New to Everything

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Guest 0384, Feb 9, 2012.

  1. Guest 0384
    Offline

    Guest 0384 New member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Local Time:
    2:49 AM
    Hi there everyone!

    I am brand new to the world of chastity, BDSM, FemDom, and the like. I am very eager to learn and explore my own sexuality, and I am hoping to make some new friends and maybe have a support system, perhaps even find a mentor.

    Let me tell you a bit about myself... I have always been a very sexually liberated person. I am the woman who answers a perverse sarcastic joke with an unadulterated truth, or the woman who has lengthy discussions about sex and the taboos associated with it. I don't know, I guess I just have no sense of shame or see a reason to hide sexuality in any form. I can embrace it all, even if I don't get off on something personally, I would never disrespect or judge someone based on their preferences. I feel that it's a very low and childish thing to do.

    I have also noticed in myself a love for Dominant males sexually, but in a relationship I tire of them VERY quickly. I push them around (not physically), I become bossy, intolerant, and I feel like this might be due to my own denial of my wish for a submissive partner. I feel conflicted in relationships with dominant males, I feel an urge to lead them, and then of course, feel frustrated at their dominance so I rebel. So I guess I am trying to find my own place and role in the game, and hopefully find a partner to accompany me.

    So why am I here... Well it started with a Craigslist ad, actually. Someone posted looking for a new owner for their current chastity pet, and of course I was immediately curious. I wasn't necessarily answering in order to take her up on the offer, but I was interested in the notion and wanted more information. BOY did I ever open the floodgates!

    Next thing I knew I was tracking down every forum, article, and e-book I could find. I read about cuckolding, chastity, FemDom practices and more. So I guess now, I am wanting to take her up on her offer for her pet... But since I have never done this before, I feel sort of intimidated. It's a huge responsibility, and I am scared I will not meet my sub's needs, live up to his expectations, or maybe I will find out that I'm not really cut out for it. Or maybe I will find that I like to give pain TOO much, and that idea scares me too. I know I have left welts and scratches from biting and digging my nails into men before and not really knowing why... I hope to find a healthy reasoning and outlet for that. I don't want to "hurt" the other person or cause pain, I did it with the idea he would like to see how good what he was doing felt... I hope to channel it so a partner and I get mutual benefit. I hope this all makes sense.

    I will continue to read and explore before I do anything in real life with anyone, of course... But they do say you learn best by doing, so I hope I can get some help here to prepare. I want to be a good Mistress, I just need someone to show me how.

    Thanks!
     
  2. MistressL
    Offline

    MistressL I'm through

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2010
    Messages:
    147
    Likes Received:
    547
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Professional
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    USA
    Local Time:
    11:49 PM
    You've entered a fun and exciting world. And I am sure you will meet new friends and gain support in many forms.

    Growing up, sex was taboo for conversation, even with my close circle of friends. The sexual revolution was about to start. It was difficult for me to openly express myself sexually until I met my husband. His joyful view of life helped me find a comfortable place somewhere in the middle. We played with bondage, me tying him up and spanking him. I found out early I had no desire to receive, but enjoyed making him happy. He has always been the most kind and considerate person I've known and has always put me first in his life. I eventually found I enjoy the rose red glow of a bright red butt. I now have my own handcuff collection, go figure.

    Raising children that are now grown and have families of their own I do recall loving him dearly but truth be told, I did most of the work. It allowed him to finish his education and explore his other passions. He worked hard during the day at his job and so did I. He rarely did the dishes, kids did that, he didn't take out the garbage, kids did that, he never did laundry, I did that, and you can see where I am going here.

    When the kids left home for college and their careers I ended up doing most of the work. He finished his last graduate degree and traveled more, working on committees, doing workshops, and I got to a point where I was very frustrated, emotionally, physically, and sexually unfulfilled.

    Satisfaction was only a word for a quickie. I wanted more help from him and more of his personal time. We played very little; one of us was always too tired or lacked the interest and years passed by I knew things could be better. After discussing things with him we both decided to think outside the box. We discovered male chastity. I do not consider myself a femdom but we read everything we could find and male chastity kept popping up. I asked him what he thought about it and he was willing to try it. I ordered an MCD from ClubFEM. http://www.clubfem.com/mcd1.htm

    I saw an immediate improvement. They claimed the MCD would insure total control by the Mistress/Domme over her male slave's sexual activities. That was way over the top for me until I started putting him in it on the days and nights I worked. The first time it was for a few hours, then a day, and finally three days. That was about all he could take before it would make him sore. He did complain about the pain in the early morning hours but I was determined to try this. A few months went by using it off and on. There was a drastic change in him that was hard to believe.

    He found a site that offered plastic chastity devices and ordered a CB2000. I soon learned it was a toy. Sorry if I offend anyone but this is what I believe. He wanted to try it and we did. It became more of a fetish for him and I tested him with it. He admitted he could pull out, shake it and orgasm. I used a vibrator on him with it on and he didn't last long. I was disappointed, but not surprised and wanted something better.

    I read more and more and ran into The World of Mistress Lori. http://www.chastitytube.com/ I emailed her about certain issues. She opened my eyes to a different lifestyle, let alone a solution to some of our problems. He, on the other hand found the Neosteel site. http://www.neosteel.de/ We ordered the measurement kit and ended up with a full belt for him. I still liked the chastity tube from Mistress Lori and emailed her again. A year later, after he received a prince albert piercing he would also have a stainless steel chastity tube. On our wedding anniversary I surprised him with it.

    Having both the stainless steel belt and the cage gave me the flexibility to switch as needed, considering travel, yard work during the summer, and so on. Both are real devices and work very well. They are not toys. They are for real male chastity and control.

    Now, I would have to say we live a female lead relationship FLR with a D/s flavor. It’s our personal lifestyle. Titles and names don’t always match. He is locked until I say so. He has become the best of the best husbands. We are both still madly in love and I do care very much about him.

    I want to welcome you here, SammyKnuckles, I like that name. Search, have fun and enjoy.
    MistressL
     
  3. Guest 0384
    Offline

    Guest 0384 New member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Local Time:
    2:49 AM
    Wow, MistressL, I want to thank you for such an in-depth and well thought out reply. I really appreciate all the information and you sharing your experiences with me. I am very much looking forward to exploring this lifestyle and the different roles we can all play. I just this morning emailed my prospective 'pet'. I am nervous in one way, because I am still very new and I don't want to be "bad" at it, or not live up to his expectations (or vice versa). On the other hand, I am very excited and eager to start training.

    I have been reading book after book, tutorials, forums... They have all been a huge help. I am very glad to hear that you were able to infuse your marriage with love and restraint in a way that works for both of you. I can only hope I will find my own way, too, and find a life-mate of my own one day.

    Again, thank you for such a wonderful welcome!
    SammyKnuckles
     
  4. Strict Sir
    Offline

    Strict Sir Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2011
    Messages:
    366
    Likes Received:
    115
    Trophy Points:
    53
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    USA
    Local Time:
    12:49 AM
    Welcome to the Mansion! Nice introduction. You'll find lots of info and friendly people here... enjoy!
     
  5. Guest 0384
    Offline

    Guest 0384 New member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Local Time:
    2:49 AM
    Thank you so much!
     
  6. mikecb
    Offline

    mikecb Long term member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2008
    Messages:
    1,530
    Likes Received:
    139
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Local Time:
    2:49 AM
    Sammy, you might also considering joining fetlife. It's like Facebook for kinksters. You may find a local group in your area that has munches. It would be an opportunity for you to get out and meet other Dommes and subs, socialize, and get a feel for how people do things.

    mikecb
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice