I haven`t posted in a while but I am back for some advice. My wife is veey vanilla and has hated the idea of chastity and wouldn`t even allow a chastity cage in the house. She did relent for a while and we had a modified FLR relationship. I could not masturbate and could only have an O inside of her. She would tease me some during the week and I loved doing things for her to please her. Well long story short I began to loss interest and wanted the kink of wearing the cage more than the FLR. This went on for a few months and she noticed that when I was pleasing myself I didn`t treat her very well. Three weeks ago we talked about it and agreed to go back to orgasm denial. It was working until she had to spend four days away on a retreat. She told me I couldn`t cum while she was gone. I knew i couldn`t do it without help, so i locked myself in the only cage that i had not thrown away. Its a steel HT3 knockoff. It was very painfull at night but i love the feeling of being restricted. Its very addicting. When she got home i confessed that night to what i had done and told her I couldn`t throw out the cage. She told me fine as long as she didn`t see it. That is a huge step. She also told me that she had dreams of me controlling her in bed. So thats what I did. We had beautiful piv sex. The next night she brought it up again so i took her clothes off and licked her to orgasm. Before she could come down i entered her and told her to use me. I have always fantasized about entering her and not being allowed to come. So she came again and i pulled out without cumming. Afterwards i told her i would need to lock myself up again if she left for any length of time. She says ok. What do I do now? Can we have an FLR relationship outside the bedroom with me being doninant in the bedroom? It seems like a conundrum. Any insight would be appreciated.
We are new to chastity, I’m locked up most of the time. My wife loves the cage, but she is extremely submissive in bed otherwise. I collar & restrain her frequently, it’s all oral and toys sometimes a strap on. So far I’ve been unlocked 4 days in June. That’s when we started going longer than a couple days locked. But yes, I have primary control in bedroom. Just don’t get unlocked without her wanting me out.
Yes, you can do whatever makes you both happy. There is no playbook, no set rules and no right or wrong way to do this. There are things that make each of you individually happier and things that make you both happier. You just need to navigate those together. It sounds very promising to me that she is open to something you want (chastity) and you are pleasing her in the way she wants (bedroom dominance). Have fun, don't stress about right or wrong way. Communicate and be patient.
Thanks. This gives me hope that this can work. The fact that she will allow me be locked at all is a huge step for her. I will keep taking small steps and keep pampering her. This could be the answer for both of us. I will post again if there are any new developments.
There’s no right or wrong way to a FLR it’s down to you both to discuss and set your rules and limitations and expectations, just talk it all through between your selves and most importantly make sure your enjoying it!