My Wife Is On Board? A New Stage

Waxing is still not done, but it's still on the table. She told me that if she waxed me that I would be "screaming like a little bitch". I told her that that wasn't her problem and she agreed. She said she will do it. I've a feeling that it will only happen if I keep pushing her, which isn't really what I'm striving for. I think it could be fun for us, but I'm not married to the idea. It's not worth pressuring her... I will probably buy the materials and give her the opportunity. If she doesn't do it, it's not a big deal.

Last night she was playing with my balls, and I mentioned that I had some discomfort there. She said something about how of course they hurt because I had "several pounds" of metal attached to them. Mind that I haven't been in the cage for a month or more. But that didn't deter that line of thinking. She said that there was probably some lingering damage. Obviously she has some concerns about the safety of a cage.

To be fair, I haven't found a perfect fit. My base ring on the best fitting cages seem a bit tight, but the next size falls off in my sleep. I don't think a ball trap is the way to go for me. My balls are always a bit tender when wearing a device and afterwards.

But I'm not pierced, and she is resistant to piercing. She doesn't like the way it looks. She has had issues with allergies to metals in piercings causing infections on her ears. I've never had any sort of piercing, but my mother also has sensitivity with her ear piercings, so my wife suspects that I could also have a problem. It's a reasonable fear, as an infection down there would not be fun. It's hard for her to think that it is worth the risk when she's not sold on the rewards. For her, it's a risk for no good reason.

All this is to say that it's hard to imagine that my wife is going to turn the corner on this. She likes the idea of having control over me. But she doesn't care for making me serve her sexually. She doesn't like oral. She isn't really into sex. I think of this as a way to get her more sexual, but it only works if she takes an active role, which seems to be blocked by her fears of injury to me coupled with her indifference about sex. It's like trying to get a toddler to try a new food. They may like it, but can't imagine that possibility, so refuse to try it.

 

Back in the cage.

I sent her an email that basically said that I made a mistake in asking to be let out of the cage during my tooth infection, and that she had made a mistake in letting me out.

Her response was nearly instant "Put it back on bitch!"

So now I'm in the cage. I haven't been in it for a couple months, and it's an adjustment. She seems... Happy? Just a subtle bounce in her step. Exactly what I want. Exactly what I also fear. BCWYWF, right? It hasn't even been 24 hours, and already I wonder when I might be freed. I don't think we've had sex since I was last in the cage, so if I'm hoping her libido will save me, logic says otherwise. I just hope that I can handle it without any soreness.

 

It's really common for women not to want to do this. It's pretty discouraging. Hold in there, though. You can do your part to improve your relationship. It's hard if she isn't reciprocating, but if you can treat her well, and not expect anything in return, you might find her returning to you.

Chastity can't fix a broken relationship, only hard work can. I'd shelve the Chastity idea until you've fixed the relationship a bit.

 

Yesterday, I sent her a fantasy story that I wrote. Every so often, I write an erotic fantasy starring the two of us. It's usually set in the very near future, and it usually takes place shortly after a shift in the relationship, where she has suddenly taken more of a direct role in being a Dom/keyholder. This latest story was about her having me tie myself up and then teasing and punishing me. Last night, she gave me a more sensual than normal goodnight kiss, so I guess she liked it?

After she fell asleep, I reread what I had sent. It was way crazier than I had realized. Like.... Wow. As I read it, it was like reading a literotica story for the first time. I honestly found myself surprised at where the story went. Mind that I just written it over the previous 48 hours. Like... How do I forget already? But it was beyond my normal fantasy story that I sometimes share with her. It was way filthier. And while she didn't directly respond, she seemed to have liked it? It's hard to say, because sometimes she just doesn't read what I send, so maybe it's coincidence that she kissed me so passionately?

I think if I was acting quite sane, I would have toned the story down a lot. You know.... Remove the CBT and cum eating? But I'm quite a way from sane right now. I'm a week into a stint, and it seems more serious this time (like she might just tell me no if I ask to be unlocked). My denied lust is clouding my judgment, so I sent this filthy story starring my wife and I to her. But maybe my vanilla wife liked it? Maybe she found it hot?

 

I just asked her if she read it. Nope. Not yet.


Welp. I need thoughts and prayers. This story may have gone too far.

 

It's even money whether or not she even goes back to read it. I'm just going to leave it. Taking it back would definitely raise a red flag, and I'm pretty sure that would spark her interest and increase the chances that she reads it. It's fine. It's not going to break anything between us.

 

I have been a poor chaste husband. I have continually unlocked myself without permission, and remaining unlocked without even letting my keyholder wife know. So yesterday I locked up and left the key for her. And I wrote her this email:

Dear Goddess,

My willpower is not as strong as I thought it was. It is weaker than I have led you to believe. When given the opportunity, left with access to the key, I have repeatedly unlocked myself without your permission. I have stayed unlocked without even notifying you. Most importantly, I have violated the most crucial terms of our contract on an almost daily basis. Basically, I've been in breach of our contract more often than not. Our contract allows for you to punish me however you please. If our agreement is important to you, you should not let this pass without consequences.

Moving forward, I beg your assistance to honor my part of the agreement. Please help me by closely guarding your key, and not allowing me any access to it without your knowledge. Even your direct supervision while I am unlocked may be necessary to ensure that I do not breach our contract again. I cannot be trusted to control myself, which is part of the reason why I have invited you to take that control for yourself. I beg you to be extremely strict with me to ensure that I remain faithful to our agreement from now on.

Yours truly,

A very bad boy

We'll see how she reacts. It has been long enough that I know she has read it, and decided not to respond with an email. Perhaps I will find out if she will take my message to heart, or if she will continue to be lenient with me. I do know that the key is not in her bedside drawer as it usually is.

 

Every so often, I send my wife something related to heating up our sex life. Over the past few years, it's been chastity focused.

She almost never replies. Sometimes I'll ask if she read the email, and the answer is always that she is planning to read it later. I assume that almost all of them remain unread.

So a few days ago, I sent her a link to a pretty vanilla chastity related website. Again I asked, again she says "later", "But when though? You always say later. I'll bet there is at least 20 unread emails that you said later about. Will you actually read this?"

So, long story short, she did read. She said she read the whole site. She "learned a couple of things". There is still an open dialog. Possible movement in the right direction.

Last night I asked her if she wanted to write another contract together since she never took advantage of any of the benefits of the previous contract, and she is open to doing that. I want to know what she wants from the arrangement, if anything. If nothing... I don't think it will work.

So.... Progress? Or maybe she is continuing to buy time and avoiding sex all together? We'll see.

The site I sent is https://happy-marriage.neocities.org/index.html

 

August 1, 2021.

I'm back in the cage.

I've been walking a fine line between empowering my wife to do with me as she desires, and overwhelming her with too many options and too much kink. I'm not sure how to balance that. I try to tell her not to focus on the details she doesn't like, but to focus on making it something that she does like.

I showed her a cartoon (see file) because it gave me a really positive, sweet vibe for how chastity can work between us. The scene isn't realistic for us, mainly because I don't think my back can take anyone larger than a 5 year old on a horsey ride. I wasn't trying to prescribe a scene to enact at all. But she picked up on the ball gag. She called it a choker, so perhaps she didn't even see it correctly, but she said it wasn't going to happen, which entirely missed the point of my sharing the cartoon in the first place.

I don't know how to convey that I'm up for anything she wants to do to me when any examples I provide are interrpreted as something on my wish list. Like I'm down for a lot of things that I don't particularly want to do... But if I provide an example, she thinks it's my wish list.

But on the positive side, she asked me where the feather duster that was purchased as a teasing tool could be found, so she is maybe turning a corner. And as I said before, this whole situation is in response to a website that I shared with her that talked about how a woman can use chastity to get what she wants. That website suggests a 3-12 month break in period to really drive the point home to the man that he no longer has a say about his own orgasms. So, we'll see how long she wants to go, but I could be in for my longest lock-up by far (my longest is around 30 days).

Exciting times. Also a little scary.

 

We discussed the picture. I emphasized that I wasn't trying to prescribe a specific activity, and that it was more the feeling of innocent young love that spoke to me. I also pointed out that I probably wasn't capable of having her ride me like a horsey. She understood, and said she knew that from the start. She just felt the need to state that she wasn't interested in gagging me. I told her that she was in charge, and shouldn't do anything she didn't want to do.

She is still very shy about taking control. I worry about being locked and forgotten. I think that I should continue to play the patience game, but it's difficult. Wearing a cage brings so many emotions to the surface that it's hard not to be needy. I want so badly to move forward and have her leverage our positions by teasing me to make it harder for me and assigning tasks to make things easier for her. I think if I'm patient enough, she will come to where I want to be, but it's so hard not to nudge her.

I had a dream that she and I lived separated for some reason, and she refused to live together. This felt like a recurring theme, but I don't know if I have dreamt it before or if it just felt like that. Either way, it speaks to my state of mind. I am trying to bring us closer, and she is resistant. Maybe because she has a different idea of what closer looks like. I don't think I can force her to realize that she can make the relationship she wants. She just needs to tell me what it is. But even telling her that seems like it's too pushy, too topping from the bottom behavior.

I feel a need to act in my gut and my loins. I feel a need for stillness in my mind. I'm not sure what wins that battle.

 

So, what's it like being locked up long term? The longest I've been locked is about a month. My wife didn't tease me at all.

Now this time, I'm 2 days into what might be 90-365 days. A totally different thing. If I'm locked and ignored for that long, will I just lose interest in orgasms?

She says she's on board with teasing, but 2 days in, and it's not really happening yet. I think she has performances anxiety about it. I'm not sure how to help. I'm trying to leave her alone about it, but... You know.

What she hasn't said is if she wants to follow the "break in period" of 3+ months suggested by a website that seemed to pique her interest. I'm just assuming that maybe she is thinking about that timeline. I'm trying not to ask. But if she isn't teasing at all, I don't see the point of locking up for that long.

But what happens if I complain? I'd be very disappointed if she caves in and let's me out. I'd probably be dispondant if she locked and ignored for 3+ months though.

2 days in boys, and I already have some regrets, lol.

 

I forgot what a tease cuddling can be. Non-sexual cuddling is a huge turn on when I am in a cage. Last night we cuddled for quite a while, and it was bliss, and it hurt as well, because I was trying so hard to get an erection. This morning she grabbed my balls briefly, so there is also some effort at explicit teasing. It's a start.

We used to have a feather. She wanted it for teasing me. I showed her a few feather things we have, but she had something different in mind, and we seem to have lost her feather in the move. So of course I Amazoned a feather post haste! We'll see what that leads to.

Today, she discovered that I fucked up last night. I neglected to put away a whole chicken that she had cooked in the pressure cooker. It sits on the counter all the time, and I'm not in the habit of checking it. This is the second time I have made this mistake, but the first time in chastity. I suspect that I haven't heard the last about this. She's super annoyed.

I suggested a chore tracking app. It has points and rewards built-in, but I mentioned that she would probably want to just ignore points and either reward or punish me on her whim. She agreed with "Will do. Beatings....." I don't know how serious she is about that. She hasn't ever spanked me enough to make a punishment, and has been very hesitant to do that, but..... "Beatings..."

 

I've been locked for 16 days now. Well, 16 days and 12 hours.

Looking back, there was no punishment for the chicken, and no chore tracking.

But last night, she "punished" me. More a tease, really, but it was the most attention that I have received while in a cage.

You see, she and I are fans of rival sports teams. It's one of the oldest rivalries in baseball, and right now, my team is ahead of her team in the standings. They have been matching each other's results for a few weeks now.

Watching the news last night, her team won their game, and she asked me "isn't that cool that they won?" Of course I answered honestly and told her it would have been cooler if they lost.

Well, she bit my ass, and asked me again. On and on for a few minutes, biting my ass, spanking my ass, pulling my pubes, ass and underarm hair and generally making it uncomfortable for me, trying to get me to change who I root for. Her torture was mild. I don't have any marks, but it was something. She seemed to enjoy it, and I know it turned me on.

I won't change teams! But I suggested that she might want to continue torturing me for as long as I keep rooting against her team, and she agreed that it was a good idea.

 

I'm trying to get her to buy a remote control estim device for my birthday. Her initial reaction was, "I wouldn't zap you. That's messed up!" but I told her that the idea of her being able to shock me from across the property (or across the store) was a huge turn on for me and asked her to consider it. She said she would consider it.

I believe that she would love it, so long as it didn't cause any burns. I can totally picture her with an evil grin, reaching for her remote whenever I was out of line.

And now I'm hard in the cage. 17 days and 14 hours in to the current lockup...

 

Patience. It's so hard to be patient.

It feels slow to me, but my wife is changing. Today, I mentioned that she bruised my ass the last time she bit me, and she asked, "Is that a problem?".

"No. I was just..".

"Then shut up, bitch."

I suspect that some day soon, she is going to go off script and really blow my mind.

But it's really hard not to constantly drop hints about how she can own me. It seems that she already knows that my limits don't really matter, and no longer needs my help to decide what to do with me? At the same time, she is moving slowly, while I want to already be at the destination. I have to learn how to let her control the kink, and trust that it will eventually come (even if I do not).

 

My wife does not want me to get pierced. She's worried about physical problems arising. She also hates how they look. I haven't brought teather spouts up because I can't quite figure out how it even attaches to a cage. I assume that a teather spout would be even more scarry for her. Definitely more scarry for me... Which I kinda like.... Talk about invasive!

I think eventually she will want me pierced assuming she embraces chastity and realizes that she will almost never have to look at my pierced penis. If she lasts a couple months longer, I may revisit. I know that I have told her that I can pull out, but I doubt that she has put any thought into that. She may see that as problematic in a couple of months, if she likes chastity.

 

Yesterday she started mimicking using a remote control on me, and making buzzing/zapping sounds. Is she seriously considering a remote control system for zapping my junk? That would be something quite unexpected. I told her that she didn't have the guts to do it, and she told me that maybe I shouldn't be so sure about that.

I can't help but prod her. I want her to do it. And yes, the idea frightens me. I'm positive that she would have a ton of fun with it if she actually used it. It's something that could seriously make me regret bringing it up. I also know that if she doesn't do it, I will continue to bring it up until she does it, or says that it's not happening.

The idea drives me crazy. I keep thinking 'What if she says that I have to wear it all the time? What if she has an unlock date in mind and tells me that the date gets moved out farther for each day I won't wear it?' And every time I think that, I have an erection fighting a losing battle with the medal cage....

The idea of being punished and teased in real time, at the push of a button is electric. I can imagine her zapping me in everyday situations, and not being able to do anything about it aside from exactly what she wants me to do.

23 days and 14 hours into this, and I'm close to entering uncharted waters, time wise. I think 30 days is my longest, but this time is different because she is participating in subtle ways. Her participation makes a huge difference, even if it's more subtle than I would hope for. I'm quite desperate and turned on at all times. And if I end up with a zapper installed under my cage, that would certainly make it harder to keep my mind off of my wife. She could bring my services to the next level as abruptly as she wants with so much power.

I could end up really regretting some of this. I also still want it. I should really stop thinking with my dick.

 

I asked my wife today what happened to the feathers. As I believe I wrote above, she asked me for some feathers that she would use to tease me. I got the feathers, but she hasn't used them. She told me that she liked the idea of being able to zap me much better. I really think she might have purchased a system to zap me...