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My situation

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Simon Bee, May 10, 2017.

  1. Simon Bee

    Simon Bee New Member

    May 19, 2014
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    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Turku, Finland
    Home Page:
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    2:21 AM
    I was recently able to wake up my blog "Chaste Diary" from its months long slumber. Keeping the blog and reporting in detail about the lack of my sexual life used to be my main source of arousal, and a thing I masturbated and edged to. However, for various reasons it ended up on hold.

    The update I posted couple of days ago is basically a recap and contains very little description of sexual activities. It does, however, contain a lot of material about how I see male chastity and how it relates to my situation. It is, in fact, the longest piece I've written about the practice, ideology and philosophy behind denying yourself orgasms.


    Hopefully you find it interesting. Comments are welcome, as usual. You may also contact me via the means listed on the right hand column of my blog.
    danijean001 likes this.
  2. Vinny

    Vinny Locked up again. Starting year 6.

    Jul 24, 2014
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    Nice blog but I assume it is about self locking with is a horse of a different color when compared to chastity with a KH. Not worse, just a different experience. I admit that I do not get self locking because there is no harm to ejaculating as much as you want unless it interferes with your life. I have lived a life in orgasm seeking behavior. I am also sexuall submissive so without someone to dominate me sexually, it would be like my 47 years in S&M and whipping myself. Not the same thing as having a woman do it. So I am fascinated by self locking and I have been reading that self lockers have become the majority into chastity play. Most are honest about it but many post fantasy stories. Whatever floats your boat.

    Have you done chastity with a partner and experienced the exquisite pain of being edged for an hour each night, only to be told to lock up again. Have you had sex with someone where it is solely for their pleasure and you are the instrument of that pleasure, seeking nothing but denial in return? Have you locked up because someone you loved asked you to? The reason I ask is because if you did have a loving KH at one time, I would be interesting in comparing the two experiences and the pros and cons of each. For me I need to have a woman in control. I also need that woman to be someone I love so I can trust her 100%. I am an old guy so orgasm denial at my age than it was when I was in the 30's and having sex with a woman during my lunch hour, then going home to have sex with both my wife and our girlfriend in a threesome and then one on one. That is 4 orgasms a day. Back then I thought Chastity was stupid because I enjoyed orgasms a lot as well as BDSM play.

    Late on when I was treated for depression, I was told, true or not, that BDSM or submissive sexual play is often the refuge of the depressed. Once I started on medication I lost interest in the extreme S&M play we are into. She was right.

    Also curious about what benefit you get from self locking and how do you deal with being both the prisoner and warden? I am a firm believer in an emergency key because mine has saved the day, once when I needed surgery on my penis to get at severely infected kidney stone that has infected my chest so bad that one lung collapsed and the other was half collapsed. They had to quickly scan me after removing all metal objects and then wheeled me into the operating room where they cut off my jeans. Having a cage still on, even if they had the equipment and could find someone late at night who could remove it without cutting my penis off, would have delayed my operation and resulted in more harm. As it was, I ended up staying in the Hospital for 8 days, the last few in isolation. Then I had to have a second operation where they once again had to go into my urethra. I was out of work for over a month. There are been less dramatic instances where my emergency key had ended pain when a testicle slipped out or my scrotum started burning like heck. My point is that if I had access to the emergency key and was my own keyholder, I would use it when I got really horny. Having the key off premises or locked where I could not get it, is unacceptable to me as I learned to play safe and sane in the BDSM world. Learned that after I tore my colon after my wife and girlfriend had a vigorous pegging session with me. It was my fault because I refused to use my safe word.

    So how do you handle all of this and what are your benefits being locked up with no KH. Orgasms are the most fun you can have for free and good for you prostate. Maybe not now but when you get older it helps. My wife shared her girlfriend with me for 30 years and let allowed me to have sex with her girlfriend without my wife taking part. It actually was my wife's idea which started out as a way to deal with my high libido and prevent me from cheating since she was not into BDSM to the extent I was. So I do chastity for me to limit masturbation but mostly do it because my wife says that after decades of sharing me with various women and being way behind me in the number of orgasms, I owed her a lot of orgasms. Plus she is not a penis fan and has not allowed penetration for so long that we cannot remember the last time and I cannot remember what it feels like. Then again, I cannot remember what I ate for dinner last night.

    So compare and contrast chastity while self locking and with a KH. I do not think anyone has done that. Heck. S&M with CBT is different than S&M with whips and canes. Same fetish but different experiences. I assume it is the same in chastity.
    fatbloke6 likes this.