My Math

So, I assume that I am not alone, that when I stop masturbating, lots of feelings change. I get butterflies in my stomach, I get more sensitive to my wife's beauty, I get needy for her attention, I get sore down there, and I get sensations in my "thing". Lets call the combination of all of this "the feelings".

The problem I have is that for me anyway, "the feelings" build up much faster than they can realistically dissipate them in a normal married relationship. On a scale limited from 0 to 10, 0 being totally depleted, and 10 can't concentrate from the butterflies, fantasies, and soreness....here is "the math":

starting at 0...

Each day with little contact with wife: +1
Each day with cuddle time: +2
Each day with lots of contact or teasing: + 3 or more

Each Masturbatory Orgasm: -5
Each Vaginal Orgasm with Wife: -4 (can't explain, I just need 2, 3 to feel depleted even if they rock my world, I think that the act itself builds up the very chemicals its intended to dissipate, if you do it right

The last week:
Tuesday: Intercourse did not finish: +3 = 3 on the "feelings" scale
Wednesday: Intercourse Did finish: +3, -4 = 2 on the scale
Thursday: Little Contact: +1 = 3 on the scale
Friday: Cuddle and Teasing (gave her O): +4 = 7 on the scale, all day Saturday I was a mess and wrote about it
Saturday: Cuddle, Tease, Good O: +3, -4 = 6, Sunday was pleasant, I can handle 6
Sunday: Lots of cuddling: +3 = 9
Monday: Cuddled a lot this am: +2 = 10 max...basically, even though I have had to good O's this week I am climbing the walls...can't concentrate, feel flush with butterflies, following my wife around, and tingling all over my groin.

I can't wait to try real chastity with my wife but holy cow maybe I am not cut out for it! Last year when I was really serious about saving myself for my wife it took months for this to improve and then I gave up for a while.

 

Yea that was a really long way of communicating that I am stuck in my own head dealing with the fact that in spite of 2 nice orgasms this past week, after a life of "cheating" my body needs relief way faster and I probably need to train it to "calm down". I'm here fantasizing about chastity but can hardly handle simply not masturbating...and in a good week!

 

well again that "system" is just me trying to explain how my hormones seem to rise as the days pass.

 

yea I am working on a few things right now...1) being stoic through the highs, 2) not being too over-the-top needy or affectionate. 3) putting no pressure on her to relieve me. these were big mistakes last time. Its hard right now, I could chase her and compliment her non-stop but what works way better is to act like a very normal husband, father, man...it seems like when I get most desperate and feel like giving up hope if i can just hang on she's suddenly ready for affection. We are spending more time in bed together since I joined this site and its bringing us much closer, which is nice.