My lovely vanilla wife and me

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Microdick, Jul 31, 2020.

  1. Microdick
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    Microdick Member

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    Hi All, been self locking for a couple of years right now. Got caught one time when my wife surprised me with a visit at work for lunch and wanted to have outdoor sex. Had no time to remove it. “What the hell is that” as you can understand we had no sex and drove home without a word. was so embarrassed I got rid of the CB6000s and just put in my PA bought a new one steel buts to big. Did get caught again. She knows of my kink side we sometimes speak about it but oh what would I wish she would be my KH. I adore her anyway! Trying to find some ways one day she might be!
     
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  2. Cumschot
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    Cumschot Active member

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    Welcome here
     
  3. madams-sissysub
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    Hi there and welcome to the mansion!
     
  4. Anonoman
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    Anonoman Active member

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    @Microdick there are lots of us in your shoes!

    Have you tried having a the ‘big’ conversation with your wife?
     
  5. Microdick
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    Microdick Member

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    No not yet to afraid
     
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  6. MissyB
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    MissyB Active member

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    Welcome to our community. Hope you find it helpful as you seek chastity with wife.
     
  7. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Active member

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    Welcome to The Mansion!!! Hopefully you can get to know some of the regulars in the chatroom.
     
  8. Microdick
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    Microdick Member

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    Maybe let’s see most of where I have been there are a lot of trolls
     
  9. Anonoman
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    Anonoman Active member

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    We don’t have that problem here :+1:
    This is one of the few places on the internet where people do respect each other and generally get on very well :)
     
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  10. bondinchas
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    bondinchas Active member

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    Ok, what you need to do is to get her on board, and you do that not by telling her "what's in it for you", but tell her, or much better demonstrate to her, "what's in it for her".

    There's a critical point in every chasity couple's relationship when each person finally "gets it!". Once she and you both understand that male chastity is all about her, and not all about him, then you both understand how to make it work for both of you.
    That's also the point of no return, when you should have been careful of what you wished for!
     
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  11. LockedInBama
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    LockedInBama I serve at her pleasure

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    Welcome and good luck!
     
  12. NZSenator
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    NZSenator Active member

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    Welcome.

    Your wife's reaction is probably not entirely unpredictable as she would have been confused about what you were doing and why you were doing it.

    A big conversation is needed, preferably away from any distractions and certainly outside of the bedroom. You should also think about not wearing the cage until youve had that conversation with her as she will likely be of the opinion "youve already decided for us, whats the point in a discussion".

    As pointed out above, explain why you are wanting to explore chastity, but also you need to show whats in it for her. You haven't mentioned why you want/need to wear a cage, infidelity? too much masturbation? just cause it feels kinky/naughty? want to be more submissive to her?

    Lots of questions you need to ask yourself first so that when you do have that chat, you know exactly where you are coming from.

    I got into it initially cause I liked the look of the cage and I liked the physical sensation of wearing it. Our journey is still new and we are both figuring out how chastity fits into our marraige, but patience and understanding is needed from both sides.

    Good luck

    Sen
     
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  13. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Active member

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    Honestly my friend it's worth it! Most of us know exactly how you feel as we have been in that situation! Is she your keyholder now? Well, no she isn't! If you "have the conversation" she may or she may not go along with it, either way you have lost nothing but potentially you could find she agrees! What ever happens and whatever you do, you have my best wishes!
     
  14. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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    Hello and welcome. There are numerous threads about introducing chastity to partners. You need a good conversation because she is no doubt very confused by finding a lump of metal locked round your penis. Good luck
     
  15. Ormaz
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    Ormaz Member

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    I won't suggest you talk to your wife since others have beat me to to it, so I’ll skip to my question, Why didn’t you try to give her oral sex on that day she surprised you with a cage on? Also, I understand you’re still too afraid to talk to her, but if she knows about your kink, why not use your tongue differently? What about trying to please her orally with the cage on? That could be a good non verbal introduction to “the conversation”. Remember the saying, “A licker is worth a thousand words!”
     
  16. Kylara
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    Kylara Active member

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    Got same problem with my wife, she was vanilla but with speak and time she is more and more happy of being the dominant and me the caged guy.

    Feel free to chat if you want to share experience
     
  17. Neo in Neo
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    Welcome to CM.

    sorry to hear that your introduction of chastity to you wife probably didn’t go as you imagined. I’m sure you can appreciate the thousand questions running through her head, most of which probably surround the ‘I don’t understand’ and ‘don’t you want to have sex with me’ theme.

    so a suggestion, I gave my wife the audio book “be careful what you wish for” (Sarah Jameson) that answered from a woman’s perspective a lot of the questions and formed the taking points to the conversations that needed to take place. Fast forward a couple of years and she is truly my phenomenal keyholder.

    I sincerely wish you the very best on this incredible and at times bumpy journey.
     
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