My long term chastity experience

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Fiber66, Jun 28, 2020.

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  1. Fiber66
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    Fiber66 Member

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    It is kind of amazing how long it has been since I started my chastity adventure. I realized the other day it had been years since I logged in here and I thought it was about time to give an update.

    Life has been wonderful since my wife and I started this journey. It has not been without challenges but once we really let ourselves go and began to do whatever felt right for us things have mostly been amazing.

    When we first began discussing chastity we were very new to the dom/sub lifestyle. At least openly so and with each other. I won't bore you with our life story but we were very fortunate to become involved with a local BDSM group that has members participating in many lifestyles. The guidance and support we got from that was incredible important.
    The one thing I wanted to share with you all though is to not be afraid to give up total control. I know for many the tease and denial is a big part of their life and if that is your thing then don't let me talk you out of it. But if you are on the fence about long term lockup I encourage you to try it.

    Like many we started with a schedule. First I would be locked up for a few days. Then a week. Then a few weeks. Everytime I was released I was able to orgasm, usually sex with the wife, or at least some sexual assistance from her be it blowjobs or handjobs or what have you. And usually I was unlocked for a few days.

    It was about a year after we started with chastity that I realized that several times after I was released we would have an argument within a few days. Sometimes I had already been locked up again, sometimes not. I also fell back into a more "male" mindset. I would feel the need to call up an old friend and go play trivia or poker at a bar. Have a night out. I realized it and I hated it. When I was locked up for weeks I felt different. Better. I was a better partner for her. We don't have a traditional mistress/slave relationship 24/7, and although we do take on those roles often neither of us truly needs that. What I needed was to be emotionally and physically submissive, which put me in a spot to serve her 24/7, be it as a traditional submissive slave or not.

    It is harder to describe in words than I thought when I started writing. So I am sorry if this isn't coming through. But basically I realized how much I loved her and how much I truly adored and worshiped her. I wanted her to literally be everything to me. I needed to put myself into a position where I am willing, without hesitation or question, to serve her every whim. If that is getting her a Starbucks coffee at 9pm or sucking a cock it is all the same to me. I am making her happy and my only happiness comes from making her happy.

    I have been locked in chastity for just over 5 years now. I have been released 6 times for no more than a few minutes each. 5 for doctor visits and she is in the room with me, unlocks me so that the doctor can preform a physical, and then locks me back up immediately. Surprisingly it was much easier to find a doctor than we thought that was okay with this by the way. She even did some research on possible medical conditions and had a talk with us about them. We were already aware of them but it was nice of the doctor. The last one was just a few days ago so we could take some measurements for my first new cage since the jailbird.

    I really do feel great. I have separated myself from virtually all of my friends and family (I did not have many of either and do not miss them) and truly live to serve her now. She is my whole world and there is nothing I would not do for her. And it makes me as happy as I have ever been.

    So for those of you considering long term chastity I say give it a try. Let go for a while. Let your keyholder lock you up with no promise of release and see how you change after a month or two. Stop thinking about your physical needs and free your mind to think of the physical and emotional needs of your keyholder. My mind already wanted to be able to fully surrender to her like that and the chastity allowed me to do so physically as well. And it has been fantastic.
     
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  2. Darlydixon
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    Darlydixon hornyman

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    thanks for coming back that was well written sounds like what I want out of this. Thanks again
     
  3. mwsubmissy
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    mwsubmissy Member

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    thanks for sharing this you and your wife sound so much like us.
     
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  4. harddenial
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    harddenial Member

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    For me chastity and friends/family go perfectly well together. I wouldn't want to distance myself from the latter. Indeed I have attended the whole spectrum of friend/family events while locked, (known only to me of course), including playing football with nephews after an anniversary party. There is surely a danger in exclusiveness.
     
  5. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Member

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    Welcome back to the forums, hope you stay around a while. Is your wife registered on the site?
     
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  6. MissyB
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    MissyB Active member

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    Nice synopsis of your chaste lifestyle. Very impressed with your wife's commitment and level of control. Hope you stay and continue to contribute to our community.
     
  7. Fiber66
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    Fiber66 Member

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    I should have noted that I do still have friends in the bdsm community. We regularly go to local clubs and dungeons and play parties at peoples houses. So we are social inside of our lifestyle.

    I already barely had contact with any family anyway. The only person I talk to regularly is my sister but I never knew my dad, my mom passed about 10 years ago so I only ever had distant relatives and was never really close to them even as a kid.

    As for friends outside of the lifestyle it is kind of the same thing. I have a couple acquaintances I met at work but to call them friends is kind of a stretch really. The job I have doesn't really allow for many friends anyway since I am in management and rarely am around peers. The company would frown on my hanging out with people who work for me outside of work. I had friends in school but we grew apart before this stuff. Hell I don't even know my neighbors name and we have lived next door to each other for 10 years. We are friendly and chat every now and then when we see each other outside but if he told me his name I long forgot it.
     
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  8. CagedHubby1113
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    CagedHubby1113 New member

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    Thank you for sharing your experience..
     
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  9. Skiddish3
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    Skiddish3 Member

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    I honestly needed this. Thank you.
     
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  10. amir
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    amir Member

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    Thanks for sharing. that was very interesting. Two questions by the way:
    1. How often you guys have sex? You giving oral? I assume no PIV based on your explanation. Any pegging?
    2. What was the doctors suggestions regarding the long term chastity? Milking? Any concerns about the prostate?
    Thanks
     
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  11. Kept for her
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    Kept for her Member

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    Thank you for your story. Sounds like what we are trying for.
     
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  12. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    Very interesting to read about your total commitment to your partner/keyholder and chastity. Whilst I could do the same, I know that my keyholder would never allow it. Giving up friends and family is just too much for her, and that's my friends, not hers.

    But I can confirm that mentally you are in a different place when your chaste, even for a few days. Suddenly the nights at the pub are more reserved and the focus is on how we're going to get home safely and not who's buying the next round of drinks.

    Well done both to you for managing long term, and for your keyholder for making it work
     
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  13. Dr MBogo
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    Dr MBogo You heard the lady! In you go.....

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    This sounds pretty similar to our experience. It started gradually, and as I found devices which worked better for me, my lockups became longer and longer. It's now been nearly 3 years of more or less 24/7. It comes off about once a week for cleaning and inspection. I leave it on for doctor visits now, and just take the key to use if she asks me to remove it. My last real orgasm was almost a year ago. I've had emissions from pegging, but haven't gotten a full erection since then. And we're both very happy.
     
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  14. Fiber66
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    Fiber66 Member

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    I have not had sex with her, in the normal sense, since 2013. She has sex with other men and women at her pleasure. I do occasionally give her oral but that is pretty rare. She does peg me but that too is rare anymore. It used to be very frequent but over time her sexual activity has moved to other people. My main sexual activity is with men now.

    The doctors suggestion was limited to telling us that I should ejaculate at least once every three months. She did not give us any advice on how. I cannot imagine that most doctors would get into that conversion. We knew that, but the time varies a lot based on who is giving the advice. I currently ejaculate once every 6 months. Most commonly she uses a hitachi to vibrate my cock and balls until I ejaculate, while I am still wearing my cage. It is not pleasurable. In face as we are also into BDSM she makes it even more unpleasurable ; )
     
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  15. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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    welcome back. Glad you've both found a solution that appears to be working well.
     
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  16. madams-sissysub
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    madams-sissysub Junior Member

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    Thanks for sharing, and welcome back!
     
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  17. remyruff
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    remyruff long time member

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    welcome back and thanks for your epic post. Amazing results for the both of you!
    One question about your sexual activity..you mentioned it's more with men now, is this due to your KH/ wife's wishes with motives of humiliating you sucking cock etc. or is this from previous tendencies you had that you are exploring now?
    Thanks for explaining it as we may be on a parallel path.
     
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  18. Fiber66
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    Fiber66 Member

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    All of the above?

    As long as I can remember I fantasized about being forced to be with men. I was never physically attracted to men. Like, I would see a girl and think she was hot, but I never thought that about men. I never saw a hot guy. However I always wanted to be used by men but mainly because I desired humiliation and that was a pretty depraved act.

    That fantasy came true as we started becoming involved in the lifestyle. It started with me eating her out after she had been fucked, then quickly to me using my mouth on guys mainly for domination/humiliation reasons. Physically I really enjoyed both oral and anal sex both with dildos and with other men, but the more I was sexually involved with men the more I because physically attracted to them. I don't explain things well, so please forgive me if this is hard to understand, but somethign about the raw power and energy of a truly horny and powerful man really turns me on. I mean my wife is powerful and strong too, but in a different way. To be used as an object for a mans pleasure is a pretty big turn on and I think by and large men are more able to transmit that raw energy.

    I would say now I am definitylu bisexual. I still am sexually attracted to women but I am sexually attracted to men too. I now appriciate a mans body and think they are hot unlike before. Some of that may come from the large amounts of gay porn I have watched too
     
  19. remyruff
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    remyruff long time member

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    great response and an eye opener,...you explained yourself very well.
    It seems that continued denial pulls out deep seeded desires in many of us bringing them to the surface and taking them beyond.
    Where you see yourself in 5 years is anyone's guess.
    Best wishes to you and your obviously victorious Wife.
     
  20. Consensus
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    Consensus Member

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    Thank you for coming back to share all of that. It sounds like you and your Wife love each other very much! All power to Her!
     
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