1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

My journey to FLR marriage with husband locked in chastity

Discussion in 'The Vault' started by MeanBitch, May 20, 2016.

  1. So making her wear boy jeans, no makeup, t shirt, breast binders, tennis shoes, and short hair wouldn't take away her femininity any sense of power associated with it? There is an art of manipulation even the most submissive female can achieve through that, but that never seems to be taken away...like "having him by the balls".
     
  2. I suppose we should start a thread about it to continue, I really wasn't talking about her relationship, just a general question and observation. I certainly do not wish to overtake her thread.
     
  3. Nice response . I'm happy that you added the second part about willingness. No matter what or how people live if their not hurting anyone else and both parties are willing than it doesn't matter what other people think. People are always worried about what society thinks. Society isn't that perfect in almost everything

    I also applaud MeanBitch for expressing her views and lifestyle. Good for her.
     
    Penney likes this.
  4. @MeanBitch@MeanBitch, what "carrot" do you use to ensure his "endurance" of your required peggings?

    Or perhaps he's now enjoying them more and you may not need as much coercing...

    I quickly found that after having introduced my chaste male to pegging, he went from reluctantly enduring it, to actually asking me for it... I typically had him warm up to it by getting him on his knees and sucking my large dildo enthusiastically, while improving his technique, until I thought he was doing it with enjoyment. At which point I moved to satisfy his newfound desire for peggings --which, by the way, are also quite physically arousing to me as well. Now, I often have to tell him to stop suggesting that I peg him, as I feel he's getting too much pleasure out of it, and I'd almost rather have him service me and pamper me in more elaborate ways instead.

    Is your husband at that stage as well, or are you implementing other activities as a show of your strengthening power in your relationship?

    xo
     
    slave_m, mrfelix, Kikki and 3 others like this.
  5. Wonderful
     
  6. She most certainly has and if they are both as happy with the arrangement then good luck to them both.

    Would anybody want it to.

    Though if it did much of western society would probably be label the guyout of date and either a neanderthal or mysogynist ..or both.
     
  7. Joroincharge
    Offline

    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    3,316
    Likes Received:
    1,604
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Female
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    England
    Getting him to ask for whatever, including sexual or other control, especially if in writing (e.g. on the back of some explicit pix of him well locked up) makes an excellent handle. No contract (unenforceable anyway) needed. Just nice juicy begging letter(s).
     
  8. When we first got together our relationship was fairly typical and we were equals. His laziness and lack of ambition started to really frustrate me and I gradually became the more dominant partner in terms of making decisions and driving things in our life, until at one point I took the step of taking total control, which saved our marriage and has worked extremely well.
     
  9. Having my husband at home assuming the "traditional wife" role has been a large factor in my career advancement, which has benefited both of us. He takes pride in helping me be successful professionally and I appreciate the contribution that he makes.
     
  10. One important part of having complete control over your husband is using that power wisely. I know that I am hard and demanding but I also know where to draw the line. Another important lesson is that things need to be gradual. I know my husband wouldn't have accepted the things I demand if I had imposed them all right away, instead I have taken my time and gradually introduced more things over time.

    A male has a lot of pride, and removing that pride is important to an effective FLR, but smashing a man's pride all at once can backfire. Achieving a balance in taking a man's pride is important. I admit that it gives me a rush to chip away at his manhood and to humiliate him in small ways, but I don't go overboard either.

    All my life I wanted to own my own motorcycle, so I learned to ride and bought a badass Harley Davidson a few months ago. On the weekends I dress in full leathers and go on rides, by myself or with a small group of fellow bikers. Sometimes I make my husband come with me, sitting behind me of course. He hates this, since "riding bitch" is embarrassing to him. Of course I love the feeling and the respect I get from fellow riders. One time a Hells Angel looked at us after we drive up to a store and said to me, "you must be a pretty badass lady" and that made my entire month, to have this tough biker acknowledge me that way.

    When I am out with my husband I never go out of the way to embarrass him, but I also don't hide the fact that I am in charge. It's a great feeling and excites me to display my power. But I never take it too far which is why my husband accepts it. To summarize, its important to practice some moderation in public, its fulfilling to show off my achievement in taming and taking control of a man, but it has to be a gradual process so that the husband gradually accepts it and doesn't rebel.
     
    locked17, Mash2214, femdomfan and 5 others like this.
  11. The carrot is that he gets his weekly release from the belt, and that his mindset has evolved to where he feels pleasure from knowing that I feel pleasure and that I am proud of him for enduring my penetration without whining about it.

    I think he's gotten used to the occasional pegging but he's never indicated that he likes it or wants it.

    My power in the relationship is clear and absolute so I don't feel the need to find ways to confirm it, however I am gradually making him get used to me demonstrating my control in public.
     
  12. Mean Bitch
    You need to get you one of those shirts that reads on the back side so that he has to look at it if you can read this b**** fell off
     
  13. MB is quite wise. Men must be broken gradually but irrevocably. The woman's control must be absolute, her husband's submission total. That is what my wife demands and deserves.
     
    Penney and spider203 like this.
  14. But, doesn't he get his weekly release anyway, assuming he behaves well? It's interesting that no other other 'carrot' needs to be offered for the additional endurance you're imposing on him, such as peggings... To me, that's a pretty clear indication that says he does like it, and even wants it, but he's ego and his stubborn male pride are still a challenge, and are preventing him from expressing himself honestly and sincerely with you.
     
    slave_m likes this.
  15. In my experience with males, it's always --at the very least-- a good idea, and often times even critical, to ensure power and control over them are strongly affirmed and reinforced/confirmed regularly, even if it's apparently understood to be clear. Gradual, yes, but reinforced both in small and big ways as well --and quite often. Don't forget males are not just brought up to think they should lead. There's thousands of years of masculine evolution that unfortunately we are fighting against as women when it comes to adjusting their behavior to make it right. That just doesn't go away easily... Ensuring he obeys, serves and worships you is fine. But what's important is that he's also absolutely convinced and happy to do so, and that he's able to honestly and openly express his pride and enjoyment in doing it.

    Otherwise, if he's not adjusted completely and he's merely tolerating it to please you for now, who's to say the gig may not be over for you one day, if/when he grows tired or fed up with it...?

    What 'small ways' do you find most effective?
     
    Mash2214, Junebug15 and slave_m like this.
  16. Joroincharge
    Offline

    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    3,316
    Likes Received:
    1,604
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Female
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    England
    Twisting his balls regularly (just to show you own them) is pretty good for getting the right mindset.:):):)
     
  17. Mistress B
    Offline

    Mistress B Mistress B
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2012
    Messages:
    2,357
    Likes Received:
    2,878
    Trophy Points:
    153
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Business Owner
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    United Kingdom
    Some do insist on maintenance beatings but I feel that this is rather unfair and leaves the subbie wondering what's the point in trying to behave if they are to be punished anyway.
     
    Mark Owen and Alceste like this.
  18. I've never seen a guy "riding bitch". I'm sure that would be hot to see. It's rare to see women on bikes, but I saw one just the other day. Must be something new going on - I'm not a small guy, but I must put on femdom/FLR vibes. Just today a mail lady was aggressive with me and she must be 20 years younger than me! It's a hot new game ...
     
    Mash2214 and spider203 like this.
  19.  

    Attached Files:

  20. Not sure the policy on this site - but this is a girl on a bike - from a femdom artist Dmitrys from Russia.
     
  21. Assuming the male is not one who LIKES the beatings I quite concur with Mistress Bs thinking (as usual) but I do know of a Russian woman blogger who used an initial 1 month period of regular (daily) discipline with her partner just to establish her authority and expectation of obedience in their FLR. Then she went back to a fairly vanilla lifestyle but with a new standard of respect and deference to her wishes. For those not pandering to male fantasy I think there is much wisdom in her approach and recommend it to women finding their way into an FLR.
     
  22. Mistress B
    Offline

    Mistress B Mistress B
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2012
    Messages:
    2,357
    Likes Received:
    2,878
    Trophy Points:
    153
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Business Owner
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    United Kingdom
    Perhaps the Russians need a little more persuasion. :)
     
    Joroincharge and slave_m like this.
  23. Perhaps Mistress B but he is Irish actually....
     
  24. Have you thought of presenting your strap on to your husband for some oral worship. A very powerful gesture I'm sure you would enjoy.
     
  25. To earn his weekly release he doesn't only have to behave well but also complete a lengthy list if chores. So enduring my pegging is really just another chore that is required. He doesn't enjoy it but does what he has to do.
     
    slave_m likes this.