My journey of becoming a key holder

I come from a vanilla background. More over - I come from a background where sex is the girls duty to keep her BF happy. Where it is very nice in the beginning, but becomes more and more a ‘duty’. As you might realize, the relationship did not last as agreeing on ‘enduring’ sex once a week is not a good foundation to share your life together.

With my current partner, everything is different though - and I think this might also be (if to a small amount) due to chastity.


We got together in May 2017. I fell head over heels for this man and - as we say in Germany - I was on cloud 7. Our sex life was also very good. I enjoyed it so much more than I ever could even imagine before.


All dates are mostly due to remembering and are approximate. My sub had the task to put together a list of the key dates of my becoming a key holder (see how well it works already, I didn’t do the work alone, but let him to the thinking )


But let’s begin from the start. So we had a very active, vanilla sex live, and I really enjoyed that. Then - in November 2017 - he mentioned chastity to me. He is a very introvert, shy person, so I know how much it must have cost him to tell me about it. And I do not think I answered well, as I was dumbstruck as I did never ever expect anything like that from him. Sure, I heard that word - chastity - but never ever had any point of actually hearing more about it than a vague idea. So it was quite a shock to hear about that. I think my partner regretted telling me about it at that point, but as I didn’t object to it totally I guess he tried on. A few weeks after this encounter, he showed me his ‘box’.

Here I might have to step in and explain. I could never really say the word ‘cage’ for it. I was too shy and embarrassed to do so. So I called it ‘the box’, which made me feel better. But the name stuck, and now we still call it ‘box’ although I gained confidence and call it ‘my box’ now

But back to the story. So he showed me his box. It looked like a transparent plastic penis, so it was quite a lot for me to take in… I couldn’t really look at it without being totally embarrassed, I remember that much.

Then another week after that, he put the box on for the first time. I remember when we were hugging in bed at night, I could feel it pressing into my bum, and that was a very very strange feeling… Very uncomfortable. It was just a short time as well…. I didn’t know what to do about that… It feels SO strange having someone want to be locked up for you and to give you the power to decide. Why would someone do that?? He didn’t mention the topic after this. But it never went out of my mind again. I continued being intrigued about it. In the end, I thought it might be the solution to my problem - not liking sex very much and feeling pressured into ‘enduring’ sex regularly. I mean if he was locked up he couldn’t have sex, right? But on the other hand - our relationship was far from that stage. So why would we need it? But then - maybe that means, it never will be at that stage??


I know now, that these thoughts are very silly. That it is not about not having to have sex, but to deny - but in return tease.


But I didn’t know it then. I thought and thought and in the end it was my life motto, that made me ask myself about it. My life motto is ‘you should use every opportunity you get to try new things’. And that kind of thing seemed to fit perfectly in that motto.

So I asked again in around January/February. I cannot remember much about that time if I am honest, just that it felt weird and wrong. But I did get more and more used to the thought of my partners penis being in my control. We got a different padlock as I didn’t like the key of the old one. I said I wanted to wear the key as jewelry so it should look nice. We then bought a heart shaped padlock with a heart shaped key.

Parallel to this story is another one. I was living in England and met my partner there, too. But I was very homesick and so I told him that I have to move back home. For now, we live in a long-distance relationship, but due to our jobs it is possible for us to see each other very frequently.

Why am I writing this? Well, because it is a key part of my journey to become a key holder. In May 2018, I moved back home to Germany. Then we were apart more frequent. I realized that it is much easier for me to write about these things than to actually say them out loud. So I think being apart seems to have worked very well for our chastity journey, as I could demand things in writing and without saying them allowed. Being demanding in writing is SO much easier for me than with my voice. I felt silly telling him off and being demanding with my voice, but not so while writing it. It was more like a fantasy in writing. And I have to admit, I still feel that way a little bit. But I get ahead of myself. We are now in May 2018. We started using the box more and more frequently.


By August 2018 we were quite into it and so we signed up on the chastity forum with one account ‘Couple4517’.


But the box…. The box was not my thing at all. It was see through and weirdly shaped. My partner also didn’t like it that much as it was a bit uncomfortable, so in September 2018 we got another one - a metal box (‘The steelworkxx looker 02’). I really liked the design and it did fit very well and I did lose a bit of my shyness and actually LOOKED as well…. BUT … yeah there always is a BUT unfortunately.
The super big flaw with this one, was the key…. It was ‘ugly’ - I mean it was a normal pedestal locker key. Usually they are functional and not pretty. But after finding some posts in the forum how people cut and glued the locking part of the key to a heart shaped head we were confident we could do it. But we are just not the most handiest people in the world - long story short, it did not work. We started looking into locksmiths and welders and asked if they could design us a key…. Nothing… How annoying. Either the box is crap and the key is pretty, or the box is nice and the key is crap

I thought we will never find anything… But then we found JosieLynn Jewell. And in January 2019 we got SUCH A PRETTY KEY. I was absolutely in love with it. ABSOLUTELY. So my sub could not remove my box anymore, because I wanted to wear my new key


Parallel to all this, we started looking into a mechanism which gave me the power to unlock and relock the key for my sub. Unfortunately we didn’t get far there and stopped looking at some point. We kept the key in a tamper evident device and so I got a new picture after everytime my sub used the key for pleasure and also for cleaning.


Also in September 2018, parallel to the key hunt, my partner mentioned FLR. hmm what is FLR? He gave me a book to read - ‘How to set up an FLR’ by Georgie Ivy Green - which was quite interesting as it includes a lot of interesting points for my journey from my vanilla background. It is very interesting and on the 4th of November, our 1.5 year anniversary - we signed our first FLR contract. Shortly after that, I created my own profile at chastity mansion and became a verified female.


We continued on that for sometime in the new year with various spreadsheets and other methods for tracking everything I gave as chores to my sub. There was more and more and more he had to track and so he missed a lot of it more and more.

Then I was sad/disappointed/mad and punished him. It got less and less pleasurable as it was just about disappointment and punishing at the end.

We also bought a lovense edge. The remote functionality is good, but unfortunately it seemed not to be very good for my sub as he didn’t like wearing it much. Another point of disappointment on top of all the other things happening at that time.

So in April 2019 we decided to stop all - FLR, chastity, everything like that - and find back together.

The impulse came from me, but I did miss my key a lot. So when my partner asked about the chastity in late August 2019 again, I was happy and thought of the time when I can wear my key again. It did take a lot longer than I was hoping for, but then in the middle of October we started using the box again. He surprised me in wearing it all of a sudden, which made me very happy as I could wear my key again. We started veeery slowly. We created some rules, but I wanted it to work. So I said the rules must be a bare minimum.


We also got a new toy - a lovense hush. It does work pretty well as we are apart so much and the remote functionality of it is brilliantly as it is much more comfortable for my sub than the Edge.


All in all it was a roller coaster with a lot of ups and downs, but I think now we are on a good way to make it work very well for us - as long as we do it bit by bit and do not haste anything again