My journey 2 weeks in after the wife finally “got it”

Discussion in 'Novices and newbies' started by Subbysubsub, Mar 27, 2023.

  1. knightly
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    knightly Long term member

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    Ahhhh, takes me back to the Sears catalog days of my youth.
     
  2. Marcus_Fappington
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    Marcus_Fappington Mid-Life Crisis Haver

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    I think you're thinking about this all wrong. Being desensitized to female bodies is the problem of modernity. What you're describing is normal male attraction to sexy fertile women. This is something I've observed in Europe, in both Germany and Sweden, that the boys/men get so used to seeing women nearly naked or naked all the time that they can be in a sauna full of naked fertile women and not even get an erection. They call this normal. Meanwhile some recent arrivals from the Middle East are raping women in the streets due to "sexual emergencies", oh also their religion forbids masturbation and pornography. Now which is healthy and natural? Well okay the 2nd one is too extreme but at least those men are men with normal hormones and functioning sex drives and sexuality.

    tl;dr - you SHOULD find beautiful fertile aged women attractive and sexy and you should NOT need to see them choking on a BBC to get hard.
     
  3. BavarianWoman
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    BavarianWoman I rule

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    But you came more often than the catalog?
     
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  4. Her_good_boy
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    Her_good_boy Evolving sub husband

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    Its definitely a 'I have the power' dynamic with my wife. She genuinely enjoys the idea of controlling my orgasms, even going as far as teasing me a few days ago when I was uncaged and then walking away just as my arousal peaked. Which in reality I asked for, because part of selling her on the idea of chastiy was wanting to establish her 'female parts' as a prize to earn and lust over rather than just something I'm automatically entitled to because of marriage. Its proven to be an instant confidence booster for her.
     
  5. Subbysubsub
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    Subbysubsub Active member

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    It’s definitely a case of “I should be the only woman you look at and desire” for my wife. She certainly enjoys seeing me get hard for her for literally no reason. If she’s fully clothed and I’m taken out of my cage, she finds it a compliment that I get hard for her. That’s good boy behavior as she says.
     
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  6. littleguy3
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    littleguy3 Adoring husband

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    You are SOOOOOO BAD!!!! haha
     
  7. GinaInCharge
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    GinaInCharge Member

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    Hi @Subbysubsub your journey sounds wonderful. I have been inspired by your wife's efforts. Is she on Chastity Mansion, I would love to chat with her. I love all of her amazing challenges for you and how you responded. Please have PM me.
     
  8. Subbysubsub
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    Subbysubsub Active member

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    She is not on this website unfortunately.
     
  9. Kfb47
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    Kfb47 Long term member

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    Well, introducing her to Gina seems like the right thing to do….right?
     
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  10. NsToy
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    NsToy Long term member

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    fantastic journey @Subbysubsub. I can only hope this clicks for my wife at some point but I don't think it ever will. She is certainly stuck in the old mindset for the 1950's housewife at some deep level. Not 100% mind you but it is still there for the most part.
     
  11. Subbysubsub
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    Subbysubsub Active member

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    Maybe leverage the 1950’s housewife and flip it on it’s head. Say I love that idea I just want to reverse the roles.

    Additionally, I’d recommend taking two weeks and demonstrating the benefits to her in a non sexual way. Tell her this is what she could expect week after week month after month. Make sure to make all meals, clean up, do all the laundry… make it so she can relax and focus on her hobbies. After two weeks I suspect she won’t want to go back to doing laundry and cleaning after that.
     
  12. NsToy
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    NsToy Long term member

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    Even though I say she has the ideas of a traditional marriage, I already do a fair amount of cooking. She kind of like doing cooking though. I do try and help with laundry as much as possible. What I need to do next is every morning, she makes the kids lunch for school, I could start doing that every morning. I could also do the kids laundry, which I don't ever do.

    I think I'll try that and we will see how it goes. I just don't expect her to take charge though. She never seems to talk about sex. She would cringe at me if I asked her to lick her pussy.
     
  13. Subbysubsub
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    Subbysubsub Active member

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    Well if permanent denial is a thing you could live with, it sounds like you might have a perfect domme. If she’s in charge and sex isn’t a priority to her then you just don’t cum anymore…ever. If your committed to trying to be her submissive, she should have every right to just take that from you forever. It sounds like (and I don’t know more than what you’ve told me) she may be having sex occasionally to appease you… now she doesn’t need to do that at all. What a win for her.
     
  14. NsToy
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    NsToy Long term member

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    Don't get me wrong, she like sex. In fact, she prefers PIV. I can lick her to one orgasm and then she gets to sensitive. I can give her multiple orgasms with PIV. She just doesn't need it as much as I do so that is why this works for us, if I have the right mind set and don't put expectations on her and then feel disappointed that she isn't living up to some fantasy in my head. I think I'm finally in the right place for that to happen.
     
  15. Subbysubsub
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    Subbysubsub Active member

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    Got it, I understand now. Well you could always submit to her without her knowing…it’s not as fun but a good first step. Commit to not cumming outside of sex and never ever initiate it, wait patiently until she wants it. I don’t know if you ask for BJ’s but you could stop asking/requesting so when the two of you do it, it’s on her time/terms and the pleasure is 99% focused on her.
     
  16. NsToy
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    NsToy Long term member

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    I don't ask for BJs. TBH, I've never derived much pleasure from them. They feel good but seldom get off from one. The only issue I have if I never initiate would be he not thinking I want her any more and having her question if I am attracted to her or not still. I will try my best and let you know though.
     
  17. Subbysubsub
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    Subbysubsub Active member

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    you can demonstrate you still are interested in her in other ways. A kiss out of no where, an unrequested back rub, reaching out and holding her hand, etc. honestly in my experience women feel more loved and wanted with small gestures like this than sex itself.
     
  18. NsToy
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    NsToy Long term member

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    Excellent advice!
     
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