My 1st Day

Discussion in 'Journals and blogs' started by slave4kris, Dec 29, 2009.

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  1. slave4kris
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    slave4kris Junior Member

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    Ok it's been a little over 24 hours since my Goddess locked me up. First, a little history about my Goddess and me. We met just a couple months ago but we seemed to click very quickly and I revealed my fantasies to her. She has never owned a pet before but said the idea intrigued her and I have to say she has already exceeded my expectations and pushed my limits further than anyone before. :anim_37: I am not an experienced submissive, being with women that weren't so open minded as my Goddess. Outside of the chastity device, I have also committed myself to my Goddess by agreeing to taking some compromising photos and if I am ever to step out of line she will send the pictures to my friends. One of my Christmas presents to her. The photos haven't been taken yet but she told me to be ready for them this weekend. We live about an hour apart so weekends are usually the time we get to see each other. Also, I cannot express how impressed I am by my new Goddess's abilities at being a Domme. I am not the best communicator and tend to hold my thoughts and feelings very close and I know these are crucial elements for a successful and happy relationship of this kind. Despite my shortcomings she has successfully extracted many of wants and desires from my closely guarded heart and implemented them into some of the most satisfying scenes I have ever experienced, personally. But we both know we have only scratched the surface, the farther she pushes me the farther I want to go and it seems to be mutual. Shortly after agreeing to give myself to her on a permanent basis, I had jokingly said something about her having more slaves to do the housework, she told me she WOULD be finding another lesser slave (for lake of a better term) for times when I didn't deserve to be unlocked. She then told me she loved the idea of making me suck off her other slave. I told her I wasn't very keen on the idea but I would try it. To which she responded "You might as well get over that because you WILL suck cock and you WILL do it A LOT!" Wow! How do you respond to that!?! Other than "Yes, Ma'am." Honestly, if you asked me a week ago, I would have said no way am I doing that. Now... well, let's just say I'm going to do my very best to please my Goddess. Anyway, I came across this forum when we were looking at the chastity devices and instantly knew that I found somewhere outside our relationship we could talk openly about the road we are on. I am already a fan and admirer of some the regulars. Goddess Jen, if you read this, I adore your post because you remind me so much of my own Goddess and I have a feeling the two of you will be in touch. You truly are an amazing Domme and partner in life, your pet/husband is a very lucky man. I hope my new Goddess and I can obtain the same level of love, trust, respect and kink ;) the two of you share.

    Anyway, I had a couple of questions.

    First, we bought two devices the CB-6000 and two days later The Curve. When we got the 6000 I tried putting the cage on (without any lube) and it was NOT happening. I couldn't even get the tip in. Now I was a little swollen but not hard, after sex. Now, maybe with a lot of lube I could have slammed it in there when it was completely soft but there would be no space at all width wise even completely soft and cold. So, we purchased The Curve thinking I was too large for the CB-6000. I go to put it on, this time soft, no sex beforehand, and it goes on but there is still no space between the inside of the cage and the outside of my cock, but I only fill up a little less than half the cage. I'd say I was average size length wise like 5 inches but width wise I have been told i was thick. Whatever that means. Ok, I have something that works. Until I get in the shower, I am able to slip out of the curve. Hmmm... still not really a deal breaker because in my mind it took me being completely soft and soap up to pull out, in which case I'm not going to be thinking about jacking it or so the logic goes. So here I am tonight, I send a picture to Goddess and she says it's too low that I need to pull it up and fix it. I do that and later start to get aroused and fill up all of the curve but like a fingers width at the end. I am also using the largest ring, which feels snug but I can FORCE two fingers inside the ring. Maybe I need a smaller ring? Obviously, I don't understand the fitment and really need some direction in that area so that Goddess can make sure I am properly locked up. I know piercing is the way to go, I am very close to be willing to do that but Goddess doesn't like it and not to mention the last time I got something pierced the stud pulled through into the middle of my ear and became infected overnight and when they pulled it out at the emergency room they couldn't shoot me up with enough pain killers to not get stick to my stomach with pain when they pulled it out. Ok, yes I was a little wasted that night but I do that from time to time. Anyway, I have some serious hygiene issues I'm concerned about so any direction there would be appreciated. I can take pictures if need be but I try not to be that guy that sends pictures of his cock to everyone he knows. :p

    Thanks in advance and hopefully I didnt leave too many words out so you can make sense of all that. :sign0090:
     
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  2. maid katrin
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    maid katrin chaste sissy maid

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    Hi slave4kris,

    congratulations, it looks as if you will have a great time of slavehood coming. Taking it from your account it seems as if your Mistress exactly knows what She wants.

    Sorry i can't help with your cb problem. I have no experiences with such devices but since you are going to be Her permanent slave She might consider a full steel belt for you one day ... and then i can certainly help.

    maid katrin
     
  3. maid_carrie
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    Hi slave4kris

    i had the same problem when i tried to get my CB6000 on the first few times until i was pointed in the direction of the stocking method by a kind adviser on this site.

    I think a popsock is possibly better.

    First off, put all of your goods inside the top of the popsock and then put the ring on - this avoids any pinching of some very tender skin! Once the ring is on pull the popsock off while pushing the ring towards you to ensure it is well back.

    Now take the toe protion of the popsock and thread it up through the slit toward the connection plate. Once it is through double it over the end and then introduce the part to be encased. When it is as far in as you can go start to pull the popsock away from you and this will gently pull the offendng item into a nice hard, yet cosy, environment.

    You should now be ready for lockup.

    There may be other ways but that's how i have been taught and it works for me.

    carrie
     
  4. slave4kris
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    slave4kris Junior Member

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    carrie, thank you for your helpful insight. That's a really good idea actually. First problem solved.

    Now it's possible I won't see my Goddess for 5 or 6 days at a time and with no room for anything to breath it kind of concerns me from a hygienic point of view. I do the VERY best I can but I know there i skin that is not getting water to it. Could someone help in this area?

    Goddess is not pleased with me at the moment. Unintentionally, I really really screwed up her bday on Monday. Sometimes I think I'm just a natural born asshole or something.
     
  5. sissified1
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    sissified1 Member

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    well, here are a few tips that may help. I am in the the 6000 also and have had to over come many issues, but can now wear it for weeks at a time. i use Q-tips and alot of lube to get it into the tube. I also use a security device that clamps down in the top just behind the head providing maximum security from pull out. as far as cleaning goes i use use the q-tips with toothpaste to thouroughly clean the skin all the way up and down, inserting them from the head hole. leaves the skin clean with a nice fresh cool feeling to boot. I do not have any issues with my skin being cramped other than the device on stop, which has left some bruising but nothing major. I hope this helps.
     
  6. PeterInCA
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    PeterInCA Dabbler in Chastity

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    Uhh... what kind of toothpaste, sissified1? I tried using it as lube for masturbation once, and... let's just say I regretted it. I think it *really* depends what kind you use.
     
  7. slave4kris
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    slave4kris Junior Member

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    Ok, it's been awhile since I posted. It's been a bit of a bumpy ride trying to work out the logistics of chastity. LOL Since my last post I had some nice razor burn that made sex rather painful let alone the chastity device so Goddess gave me a week to heal up but made sure she wasn't too happy about it and has been on my case until I went back yesterday. I think we finally got the size thing worked out. CB6000 was just too small when it came to width otherwise it was fine and I would have actually preferred it over the curve. She also questioned me whether I was ready for true submission. Which for the first time, really made me step back and re-evaluate everything. Goddess, is very adamant about me becoming a sissy girl and learning to please men. A scene here or there intrigues me as far as being a sissy but actually having to suck cock and more than likely other ways I wasn't sure I was ready for. Behind closed doors is one thing but Goddess doesn't have any shyness about any of this. I know most of you are reading this asking what is wrong with him? This is like many of our sub dreams come true but honestly am I ready for true submission? It's a lot of trust and a lot of sacrifice. Neither of which I've ever been good at. I can't help to think about what she told me at the start. "I will ruin you for every woman that comes after me." And it's that statement that sums my de lima up perfectly. Of course, I want to be pushed to my limits but RUINED for life? I'm terrified I'm going to wake up with a set of tits or something. I don't think Goddess would do that but I never thought she would push me as far as she has with very little sign of slowing down. But it is that unknown, her own real interest in what started as my life long fantasy that make me want to jump right in head first but makes me cautious at the same time. I have to admit though, nothing seems to do it for me like the idea of of her whoring me out as her little sissy girl. Friday she told me she couldn't wait to make me suck cock for the first time and that she was going to be right there to push me down on his cock when he explodes in my mouth to make sure I don't spill a drop. I do love the mental picture. Perhaps some of the other sissies could give me some advice? I'm this close to my dreams I know I can't turn back now but maybe some advice on how to keep myself in subspace even when I'm not feeling so subbie?
     
  8. jaimelynn
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    jaimelynn Senior Member

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    slave4kris,

    Use a body wash like Oil of Olay's, "Body Ribbons", my doctor actually prescribed this to me for my rough elbows a couple of years ago, then, use a baby oil gel to keep things lubed, the gel stays in place better than plain baby oil and is less expensive than silicone oil.

    i was trained and locked up by my first Mistress who, unfortunately for me took a job in a different state. This left me unowned, unlocked and wandering aimlessly. If you read in a couple of different posts i've wrote, Mistress R. followed me in a mall and when the time was right She trapped me up against a wall. Well, we sat in the food court talking for about 4 to 5 hours. We laid everything on the table. what to expect, likes, dislikes, and limits. Even if you thing this is the right Goddess for you, if you don't have common ground on these items, you could be ruined for life. i thought after my first Mistress left me wandering, i was ruined but, after meeting Mistress R. i am happy again.

    As for the first time giving a BJ if you're not ready, then, find a way to take another type of punishment until you're ready, also, practice on a strap on if She has one. My first Mistress, introduced me to licking my own juices up for a while before licking up somebody else's. Also remember to love and honor your Goddess, you will do as She says obediently.

    As for being in subspace, the longer you're locked up the easier it is to get there.
     
  9. slave4kris
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    slave4kris Junior Member

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    I am now officially undeniably a cock sucking sissy boy. Goddess took me to the naughty store, where she picked out a new outfit for me. Nothing out of the norm, a guy shopping with his girlfriend for lingerie. Goddess had on this sexy sexy black short skirt with silver sequences that got compliments from everyone and a black silky blouse. She looked absolutely amazing. While we're doing that Goddess runs into an old coworker, immediately my mind starts racing. I already know this is my big night and I know I will lose my sissy virginity before the sun rises. He's obviously gay, so he could be the one. Oh, I forgot to mention I've already been locked for five days, and Goddess has built up the situation so much that honestly I was expecting disappointment. So anyway, I know Goddess has made a lot of effort to make this night happen so I am trying to be the best obedient little sissy I can be and so I start thinking "Well, he's pretty cute. I could suck him off if he's the one." So after a several minutes, Goddess brings the conversation to a close and has made no mentions of my secret desires. So, Goddess moves on and begins talking to the woman behind the counter, asking about sizes. The woman behind the counter comes out and start yelling "What size of men's shoe do you wear? ... Ok so you need a 12 in womens... We have guys in here all the time buying women's shoes." Ok, so she wasn't yelling and there was only one other female employee and Goddess's old gay coworker. If this is it, this isn't too bad. Although the other guy being there, gay or not, was a little intimidating and not just because I think he may have some involvement in the night's events. So I eventually find myself in a side room sitting in a pink chair shaped like a heel with no shoes on waiting to try on shoes. It's just Goddess and I in the room but the woman at the counter can possibly see me if she looks this way. Ok, no big deal let's just do this and get it done. So, I try a few pairs on until I find one that pleases Goddess and fits my feet. "Those are adorable!" Goddess exclaims. I just close my eyes and take a deep breath, "This is what you wanted." I think to myself. Goddess, examines the shoes on my feet and offers her hands to help me stand. Then stands back and instructs me to walk around the room. "HEY, COME HERE THESE SHOES ARE ADORABLE!" Goddess yells to the woman at the counter. OMG is all I can think. Before it's over everyone is in the room looking at me in the shoes and I'm just waiting for door chime to announce even more viewers. Eventually, Goddess and the woman at the counter decide on a price since there was no price listed. It's a pair of black heels with sort of a red stripe/ribbon in the middle of the front. Don't worry pictures are coming. She let's me remove them (whew I thought I might have to wear them to the car) and we eventually make our way home. At one point, the gay guy says "I would look like a drunk crack head if I tried to walk in those." Now, I thought that was a bit odd. Did that mean I did a good job? On the way home Goddess had me so drove up I probably should have been pulled over for DUI. I even told her I was having a difficult time focusing on driving, her response "So, I can't take my panties off and touch myself?" Like I said, probably should have been pulled over for DUI.

    Not long after we left, I found myself sitting on the edge of her bed wearing my new outfit with a blindfold on and my hands handcuffed behind my back waiting for Goddess to bring in the real cock. Then after what seemed like an eternity of waiting but was probably only a couple minutes I hear Goddess's gleeful voice "Look at those shoes, aren't they adorable?" My heart pounding with a flood of emotions I hear one of the deepest voice I've ever heard "Damn, sissy." obviously mocking me. Goddess tells him I've been practicing sucking cock and my stomach drops to the floor. I'll leave the rest to the imagination but before the night was over Goddess allowed me to lay next to her and shower her with kisses while she got fucked by a real man and "fluff" her lover between position changes. Of course, for my finally, I sucked and licked them both clean. After he left, Goddess told me how proud of me she was. She asked me if I liked sucking cock, I shook my head not wanting to express my objection to something I know pleases my Goddess and she told me that's too bad because I will be doing a lot of it.

    Things went incredibly well even though it was our first time. I was very intimidated by the situation but Goddess made things much easier by always giving me instruction along the way. I think our only real regret is allowing our fears get the better of us. Everything was very intimidating to me and I think Goddess picked up on that and didn't let her enjoy the scene as much. It was amazing kissing Goddess's neck and seeing her expressions as she was hammered by a real man. I thought he was going to be done and he just keep going and going. When I went to bed that night I was very confused with my emotions going in every direction but Goddess held me and helped me relax after which I passed out cold. When I woke up in the morning it was like I awoke a new person and I guess I did in a way. It's one thing to talk, fantasize and plan but when you gag on that big hard cock you know you just became someone's bitch. Personally, it's a huge sense of accomplishment for me, I think because I am so closed to getting outside my comfort zone but it's some of my earliest fantasies. I've questioned myself over the years if I was gay for having these types of fantasies. After the other night, nope I'm definitely straight ;) but I had the time of my life. A high like nothing else, and I've experienced a lot. I look forward to continuing my journey and doing whatever pleases my Goddess.

    On a final note, I'll pass on a VERY important lesson I learned though all of this. Leading up to all this I tried to suggest a lot of small details to the point I upset Goddess because by doing this I didn't give Goddess her due as a Domme. So I offended my Goddess's intelligence and you know when it came down to it I really regretted it because things were so overwhelming those small details really came back to bite me in the ass. I think when we're exploring these extremes we don't allows know what we want, we think we know what we want but I think it's best to give our fantasies to our better halves and let them decide where to take them.
     
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