Mistress getting lax

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by Den737, Oct 9, 2018.

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  1. Den737
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    Den737 New member

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    My Goddess is getting lax on what i call fringe benefits. Here lately she has not been as dominant to me as she should be. I am not receiving any more mattanace paddlings. No punishments at all. Not being bound for her pleasure anymore.
    I dont think she realize that she is slowly giving up control and respect.
    I love this life style and don't want to lose it.
    I was hoping some KHs would explain to her how important this is to her sub. Any and all advice well be shown to her to read. HELP PLEASE.
     
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  2. JosieLynn Jewell
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    JosieLynn Jewell Active member

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    Sorry to hear you're frustrated, but how is it about what you want? She obviously doesn't want to do those things right now - it comes with the territory. I think you could ask her once (but not pester) about the change - she'll have her reasons, but whether she tells you or not is up to her.
     
  3. Den737
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    Den737 New member

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    Everything you said was true. I no i dont have a choice it is totally up to her. But it stills it makes feel that i have not been doing my best to please her. Which is not true.
     
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  4. OscartheTurtle
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    As with any relationship you need open communication. Don’t think it could come from someone else to have an impact on her.
     
  5. Mistress Jules
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    Mistress Jules Professional Dominatrix and Owner of Lockit
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    Sometimes us ladies can get a bit fed up of so much time being spent on satisfying your sexual fetishes. Sometimes we don't want to be a Mistress, we want to be loved and adored with no sexuality or kink involved.

    Sometimes we would like to be loved for who we are, not for who you would like us to be.

    If you cannot love us unless we are being your Mistress or Dominant then we may worry that you only want us there to fulfil your fantasies.

    Maybe you need to show your adoration is not dependent on her acting out your fantasies.
     
  6. Steviepie
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    Steviepie started male.....intelligent, feminist and owned.

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    I love to learn about women as people but I confess my sexuality makes me very vulnerable to distraction. Thank you for this timely reminder Mistress Jules.
     
  7. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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    I think you should consider this turn of events more from her point of view than yours.
     
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  8. Den737
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    Den737 New member

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    I want to thank all who responded. I guess I got what I deserved for questioning my Goddess ways. Dont think i will bw setting for a couple of days
     
  9. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Her Locked Little Boy

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    Being locked up all the time isn’t always easy @Den737 as you have most likely already found out. What your realizing now is that it’s not always that easy for your Wife either. @Mistress Jules is a very highly respected Lady with more experience with Chastity than anyone I know. Listen to what she’s telling you and show your lovely wife how much you love her unconditionally. When she see the benefits to her she may become more receptive to what you need.

    I’m my Opinion you should show this post to her and she should give your backside a very serious tanning and than leave you in boundage for at least 8 hours than tan your ass again.

    You want her to take control of you and punish you “Right” Be careful what you ask for.
     
  10. Den737
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    Den737 New member

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    Yea that's what happened today. It stii hurts to set down. I have learned my lesson and place.
     
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  11. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Her Locked Little Boy

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    It’s not always easy being in our position. I know how you feel I’ve had my backside tanned more than once. You both have to adjust to your new way of life and those adjustments may not always be what we think we want. Good Luck
     
  12. Slave to a Goddess
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    I think your the typical selfish male that only thinks of himself and not the dominant , my Goddess wouldn't put up with your selfishness.
     
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  13. Skywalker41918
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    Skywalker41918 Active member

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    This is so true my Wife my Partner, my Soulmate is always number 1 and everything else as in KH, Mistress sometimes takes a back seat
     
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  14. Mistress Belle
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    Mistress Belle Mistress Belle

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    WELL SAID! You subs are hard work, the neediness is overwhelming at times. We get tired, over loaded ,and with day to day responsibilities, that can result in us being out of character, so to say. We may show you 7 different kinds of crazy, which is where you come in...shut up, listen, be there, and for god sake stop begging for a release when we are having a hard day......and don't all of a sudden try to get offended, and lose your place with us. you are there for MORE than your fantasy fuck, or kink. When you profess to give "all"...that is a part of ALL. Develop your skills to know what may calm her down, or stroke her issues, so she feels safe and accepted, not for just the times you want to be taken by force and punished. YOU must develop skills that have nothing to do with the lifestyle, because we live in a vanilla world, we carry tendancies. Learn to meet those tendancies, and truly serve your Mistress. If you can not do that fully, stop the nonsense and quit being a sub only when it meets YOUR needs. Don't get served and server twisted. Be careful what you beg for.
     
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  15. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Her Locked Little Boy

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    You make a Vaer Strong Comment. I read it over many times and was thinking since I’m locked almost 100% of the time and serve my Mistress. How much time is sexual and so called serving my needs and desires. Maybe if I stretched it it would be 2%. With a large part of time going about our daily lives.

    Serving your Mistress is as simple as bringing her coffee, opening a door for her , caressing her feet while you watch TV together and your reward is a simple pat on the backside or she touches her property.

    I totally agree and support your comments. Good Post.
     
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  16. Mistress Belle
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    Mistress Belle Mistress Belle

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    As I do yours, kudos!
     
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  17. Mistress Belle
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    Mistress Belle Mistress Belle

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    Oh Geeze really? i didnt know there was a 5 minute time frame to post a reply....sigh...and I had my reply so laid out perfectly....
     
  18. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Her Locked Little Boy

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    Ha sometimes all this technology sucks. LOL
     
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