Actually, I have always been Chased. I have only had sex with my wife of 38 years. I’m retired now and as happens to many males over 60, my ability for sex has greatly declined. It was the blog www.denyingthumper.com which inspired me to practice chasity with a Male Chasity Device. It is the idea that the Penis should not be the focus of sex. This really spoke to me, because I was having difficulty in maintaining an erection. Also, I began to realize that to be in bondage to my wife, had a real spiritual appeal to me, since scripture teaches that as a husband, I do not own my body, but it is the property of my wife. I was taught as a young man that as a man grows older, often the role of sexual submission switches from the woman to the male. The male sex drive tends to be greater than the woman’s when young, but as one ages, the woman’s sex drive tends to be greater than the man’s. I probably should have practiced Male Chasity with a device around turning 50. My letting her be my Key Holder and wearing a Chastity Device, I communicate to my wife that I am committed to preserving and storing up all of my sexual energy exclusively for her. I will not expend it unless to commands. I have learned to be the submissive, she is just starting to learn to be the dominant. In a way we have renewed our vows and deepened our spiritual lives.
I was never chaste. I had my first girlfriend who I took on a few dates, with my dad driving of course, and at 11 had two girlfriends sharing me. I have had about 30 sex partners with about 9 after I got married. We were in what is best described as an ethical non-monogamous marriage and poly triad. So for us, chastity is just another fetish on a long list of fetishes. We were into BDSM for our entire marriage of 44 years and this is our old age version of it without all the pain and physical stress. We find nothing spiritual in chastity, but can understand why it can be due to similarities to Tantric Sex. Our commitment to each other was tested and forged by the old "if you love them, set them free. If they come back they are yours. If not, they were never yours to begin with." test. Action does speak louder than words and in your case, it is being kept in Chastity. For us it was allowing each other to pursue their erotic needs from time to time. Chastity is just a sex game for us. It feeds my masochist needs now that our girlfriend is no longer with us to do so. I did approach my wife about the whole doing it for her thing, but she already knows I love her and am committed to her, so I do understand where you are coming from.
You guys are something to be admired, to be with your other for 38 and 44 years are a both amazing things...my better half and I have only been together for 13 years. Experimenting the whole time by the way, lol. But in all actuality respect to both of you!
You are very kind. I was very fortunate to marry well. Hang in there, this truly is the best part of life... SEX OVER 60!!!!
If I had carried on behaving the way I had been prior to my Wife becoming my keyholder, I can confidently say I would not have been having any sex with her by the time I reached 60. I wasn't being horrible to her, far from it, but my attitudes towards sex were putting her completely off. She was even beginning to hate having intimate non-sexual cuddles as she would know I was hoping that it would lead to sex. The subtle shift to how we use chastity has had incredible results. Before, when we did have an intimate cuddle, I would lie there, getting an erection, hope that we would end up having sex and sulk when I didn't. She would lie there dreading my erection, not wanting sex. More often she would avoid an intimate cuddle. Now I lie there, my enclosed penis trying to get an erection, the device jutting away from my body, hope that we end up having sex and am disappointed when we don't. (No sulking anymore.) She lies with me, stroking my body, encouraging the attempted erection, giggling at my moans and twitches, getting very turned on and sometimes instigating a sexual encounter. I asked her recently what the difference was, apart from me not sulking when a cuddle doesn't lead to sex. Her response was that she didn't feel guilty denying me as she now realizes how much I enjoy the attention she gives me followed by the denial. So by denying me she is getting turned on and wanting more sex. I get more attention and get more sex. The one 'payment' I have to make is the vast majority of orgasms are hers, I get one on average every two months. It's a very small price to make.
Thank you for sharing this. We are both in our sixties and married for 30 years (this year), but our sex life has faded over time. I'm secretly into chastity and lock whenever I feel the need. It is my hope that I can find the appropriate moment to do as you have done and take out the need for her to feel obliged to pander to my advances by introducing her to my chastity locking so that she can take control of my locked penis.
Very interesting topic. I'm interested in the scripture that " teaches as a husband ,I do not own my body, but it is the property of my wife" where exactly does it say that.
Try 1 Corinthians 7:4 - though it's more of a fair exchange, neither outrank the other: The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.
That is a very accurate quote. I've had lots of people say things to me with regard to scripture and they have no idea where it's even from. It's nice to hear from someone that knows what they Quote is accurate. I agree with what you say we do not belong to ourselves