'Maintenance' punishments

Not sure if this applies, but I do get flogged and paddled by my wife on a somewhat regular basis. Not because I screwed up, but her need to work out stress from either daily things in life or to show she in a way owns mt body sexually. I am of free mind and spirit and we have an equal marriage in finances, daily decision making, and other normal daily functions. However, she does own my penis and loves control and over the years we have a domme bdsm chastity lifestyle in a sexual nature.

So when she needs to work out stress its down to the basement and tied to the cross or beams. Because of the crappy weather she is in a foul mood (no pool today) and already got out the enema kit, so some punishment is heading my way later today after work.

 

I have a male submissive who was fixed up with me by his step-sister. He loves being a submissive and also loves being feminized. Part of his life with me has been maintenance spankings which I started from the very beginning. I am not cruel or humiliating but I believe that maintenance spankings can keep him seeing who he is in proper perspective. Since he always gets an erection when he is spanked its obvious he enjoys it. The cock cage prevents him from getting fully hard. Every Saturday night at 8 PM he must present himself. He has to bring me whatever I will use because the straps and other discipline devices are kept in a closet in my den. Usually I use a strap. He must ask for his spanking and specify how many strokes and this is usually 20. He then removes his shorts or pants but leaves his panties on. If I decide to put him in restraints I tell him ahead of time. I use leather shackles and wrist cuffs but also have standard metal cuffs and shackles. For maintenance I use leather which he is to put on before he comes into my room. If no restraints he then bends over the padded bench and when he is in position he tells me is is ready and to please administer the strap. I then give him ten over his panties and pause at which time he removes his panties and resumes the position. He then gets ten more. When we are finished I put some lotion on his behind to cool it down. He thanks me. I then take him to the changing room. By the way, he is collared and on a leash for the duration. He is then diapered with a disposable diaper and plastic panties. He is generally diapered each night. I do not remove the cock cage for the spanking or when he is diapered. We do have regular times when he is allowed out of the cage at which times he always masturbates at least once and usually more than once.

 

When I’m caged, my Wife / KH uses one or a few different items to keep my attitude correct, usually every 2-3 days. Nothing extreme, just temporary welts and turning my cheeks bright red lol, I find it definitely helps keep me in a great submissive head space and gives me an incredible rush of feeling deeply closer to her. She’ll have me go to the mirror to see her work and then allows me to cuddle on her chest while I come down from that high. And while I’m definitely not into pain, I do find myself craving the spankings, although I do fear the rare punishment spanking, those are a lot rougher!

 

Our dynamic is a bit different since I have returned to working in the office. Before I leave in the morning my sub caged leashed and collared husband makes my coffee, worships my feet and then bends over for a maintenance spanking. Around 50 good swats with the wooden hairbrush. Then off to work for me (a little wet) and my sub a little horny. Great start to the day.

 

The first Saturday of each month is my maintenance session. It's the same as my punishment sessions but just not as severe or as long.

 

Its just a timely reminder of who is in charge around here. Not routine, but we don't do routine and severity is down to Lady C's current mood. Keeps you on you toes and better behaviour.

 

From the time I was in high school, I've been doing skydives and parachuting. For me, it was never about thrill. I'm afraid of heights, frankly, and I find jumping cathartic. I find it clears my head, and though it may sound contradictory, it reduces stress and relaxes.

Emotionally I find a similar effect from a spanking. It's not about pain. I don't like pain. I never did. I don't crave it, or get off on it, and it's no thrill. I find pain unpleasant. What I do find with a spanking, however, is catharsis, and a clearing of the mind. A brief period in the day of discomfort, balanced against calm. It clears the cobwebs, focuses the mind.

I suppose boiled down to simple chemicals, it may be endorphins and adrenaline. I'm not really concerned about the mechanics, but the results.

My wife doesn't give maintenance discipline, but will administer, on request. She doesn't need it. Sometimes, I find that I do. Participation is generosity on her part.

 

Maintenance punishments as a concept are very appealing to me, but for slightly different reasons than most I think. Punishment is meant to be a deterrent, but with my masochistic streak I worry that even heavy punishments I know I'll hate could become appealing if they're infrequent. I believe that routine punishments would diminish that masochistic craving from developing and ensure that the 'actual' punishments for misbehavior remain an effective deterrent.

 

I've pushed this idea quite a bit at my Goddess, a firm but fair lady, with mixed results. I think for a Dominant female the idea of following you around and spanking you every time you do something against her known preference seems a bit preposterous. Maintenance type disciple is in place as a steady way to enforce their position without having to in each and every case, and as such, is quite healthy in an FLR. It can add unpredictability to the scenario, in that it can happen just because, or it can be a pointed message in the bigger picture as to who is in charge in the dynamic.

Then again, maybe I am just saying that because I like a good spanking.

 

When we started FLR, I would get spankings every week and often had to say the word obey after each hit, but since then it has gone about every 2 weeks (no set time). For me it is a good reminder of my status and helps keep me in my servant / submissive mode. Sometimes she has been stand in corner afterward to reflect. I never asked her what she get out of our spankings but she seems to enjoy it.

 

I want to add a post script to my piece on maintenance spankings. Its about how I got into being a domme. When I was 16 my mother married a guy who was 8 years younger than she. She was 37 at the time and he was 29. He was cute and there were times when I had sexual fantasies about him. My mother had always punished me by spanking. With her hand when I ws little and with a belt or strap from the time I was 14. She was still doing it when she married this guy. Anyway, when I was 17 I got a little wild and one night came home drunk and my clothes were a mess. My mother said nothing except that I was to go to bed and we'd deal with it tomorrow. The next day I went to school, came home and was getting ready to go to a friend's when my mother said I was going to be punished for the night before. When her husband came home she told us both to go into the den where I always got spanked. I asked her if he was going to watch and she said he was because he also was going to spank me when I needed it. I got a hell of a beating with a belt that night. I know he got turned on because she made me take my skirt off and whipped me over my pantyhose and panties and when she was done I glanced at him and could see he was turned on. A few months later I did something that appeared to piss him off one day and he said I needed to be spanked. He asked my mother and she told him to go ahead. I had to follow them into the den. My mother sat down and told me to get the belt and give it to Eric. I did. Then she told me to take my jeans off. I had on pantyhose and a black thong. I had to bend over the chair as usual. He asked me if I was ready and I told him I was. He then proceeded to give me twenty hard strokes with the belt. It hurt but this time something else was happening. I could feel my panties getting wet and had a very warm flush come over me while he was spanking me. Later that night I asked my girlfriend about it and she told me that I was getting turned on by the spanking. So I figured I'd get him somehow to spank me again. It wasn't long and I knew he was getting turned on by it too. I did something purposely to piss him off and he immediately told me to left my skirt and end over a living room chair. I had purposely worn pantyhose and a black sheer thong because I knew that stuff turned him on based on my mother's change in underwear after they got married. He got the belt and gave me five swats then told me to pull my pantyhose and panties down. By now I was starting to get went so I pulled them down and stuck my butt up in the air as he told me to do. He gave me ten more. By then I was really wet. The next time was a couple weeks later and this time he made me go into my bedroom, take my jeans off and lie face down on the bed. I had to put pillows under me to get my butt up . He started with ten strokes then told me to pull my panties down and by then they were wet. This time I had on sheer white bikinis. Once he started up again I could feel it happening and I started to cum. I was grinding my pussy into the pillows and having a terrific orgasm while he was whipping me. When he got done I got up without putting my jeans on just to see his reaction. He said something I don't remember and then quickly left and I knew why because I could tell he had a hard on. I was still horny as hell so I closed and locked my door, got out one of my toys from my panty drawer and proceeded to have three more orgasms.
When I told my girlfriend about all of this she told me that if I got off getting a spanking I'd probably get off even more giving one and that put the idea in my mind and now a few years later I'm a part time domme, an expert at putting a steel cock cage on a man and really good at giving spankings with a variety of implements. And my obedient, caged submissive loves it.

 

My Wife used to give me a good hot soapy enema while i performed oral on Saturday nights after the children were in bed. I would be horny and nervously anticipate the humilation all day.

 

I have maintenance spankings sometimes once a week sometimes more. We both find it a big help in keeping on track

 

What a great way to start the day

 

How women got into Domming men, what their vision is for a D/s relationship, and what she gets out of the dynamic fascinates me to no end. I'd almost like to write a book on the subject because I'm that interested. And no, not to get a cheap thrill but to really understand the person that is the dominant woman better. I am enamored of her and feel a need to know these things better anyway, for when I'm in service to someone again.

Once I began to be taken into the confidence of women I had met and served or just played with, I couldnt get enough. I adore a strong woman with a purpose and delight in how such a woman can make wayward men into super helpful, orderly and obedient little boys, or girls as the case may be, with the tools and practices of BDSM. Even while she challenges and manipulates their minds and bodies, often to the point of agony.

So thank you so much for sharing your story with us. It is definitely appreciated.

 

With us, my wife knew from the very beginning that I was a masochist and it suited her very much because - as he puts it - "she loves to torment men" .. very quickly she stopped letting me cum, she loved to ruin my orgasms, then she starved me deliberately and it came to the point that I had to to pay (we had fun like that for a year) for each of her orgasms, as for physical punishments, she knew that I like ballbusting, but it turned out that she "more" and loves the moment when I have had enough ... she can see the fear in my eyes .. lately she has been doing it without letting me out of the cage but niu uses her legs or arms (she could hit the cage and hurt herself) and a special rope with a heavy ball at the end .. usually I can't withstand more than a few blows - that's why I have to be tied to the ladder and partially gagged .. my wife treats it differently, sometimes for pleasure, not once when she is angry and then it is worst .. I remember one time when she was mad at me (I was at a company party and came back halfway) less than agreed), she was already waiting for me at home, in addition, she was drinking wine, gossiping on the phone with a friend and she put in a little intercession and this made her beating very hard without any behavior (it's good that she is tiny) .. then I was really fed up, she poured me I think with an hour off, then I was without a cage .. every now and then she took a break, drank wine and modified the way of beating - she started with a fist, then there were high heels but she was uncomfortable and ended up on a rope, I almost fainted apart from my testicles hurt me kidneys (I don't know, but sometimes I do when she hits me hard), I wanted to vomit .. in the end I had to satisfy her orally because she got very excited about the situation.