Love / Hates

Self Locker here. On and off for about 2 years. I love the slow build of constant arousal that starts a few days in, and just continues to build. It simmers after a while, but after that, when something gets you aroused, it really gets you aroused! With a significant other, I can only imagine this becoming more intense.

I hate how it just gets in the way sometimes. I play a few sports. A supporter helps a ton, but I still feel a lot less mobile with my cage on.

 

i would say one of the biggest improvements in our relationship is our communication is much better and I am a much better listener when my mistress is speaking to me. Even though we are both very busy with our lives we now spend much more time together. Now that I don't masturbate, our bedroom play is much more intense and my orgasms are more intense. I love how my mistress has grown into her role as my mistress and she is enjoying herself very much she really likes being in control of when I'm allowed to cum.

The things I hate.... I'm not allowed to have actual sex with her hardly at all anymore. Even though she'll give me a release at least once a week we've only had sex like 4 times this year. It's always very special and very good when I'm allowed inside her but I do miss it. Also she doesn't let me pleasure her as much as I'd like too. We are somewhat mismatched in that regard, I would happily go down on her everyday while locked up if she wanted that but she rarely ever wants me to give her oral even though I send her through the roof with incredible orgasms literally every time I've been allowed to go down on her. So it just depends on your situation if the pros outweigh the cons. We were having a lot more PIV sex in the beginning and then it tapered off towards around month 6. Now 95% of my orgasms are by handjob because she loves making me cum that way. On top of that, now that I've been locked for a year it doesn't take much for her to make me cum which she also likes. So it's kinda hot because it's a power trip for her and I see how much she enjoys it but I don't have a say in how I get to orgasm which can be frustrating at times. Either way I wouldn't go back, I like that she is my mistress and I am her sub. Even a whole year into this and we are still learning a lot about ourselves.

 

Some of the pros: we are definitely focused on each other. We send naughty texts all day and we are definitely very in tuned with one another's needs/wants. I get the sex/pleasure when and how I want it (which includes him being in total control at times). I am in control of all of his orgasms. He trusts me with that control and knowing that is a huge turn on. He is always making sure all my needs are met sexually and otherwise. Making love can be very intense and amazing. We also communicate very well about what's working and what isn't.

Cons: it has taken me some time to be more confident in my keyholder/mistress roll. I like being dominated (which still happens often) and it was hard to find a good balance for us. It also took some time to wrap my head around the fact that there is no right or wrong way to do chastity, it's whatever works well for you and your partner. I feel like some of the spontaneity is missing and that things are somewhat planned at times.

 

I LOVE how it helps me see hidden beauties in so many women I meet every day........I hate that so few women understand or would accept a submissive male in chastity.