Ladies - Is strap-on sex better, worse or just different?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Doug Scibor, Jan 14, 2020.

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  1. Doug Scibor
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    Doug Scibor Long term member

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    My wife and KH is entering that age where proper PIV sex isn't something that she craves but that may be because I've never been able to satisfy her with anything other than my tongue. Since we began chastity, I have had fantasies (stoked by others who share their own) about introducing a strap-on to use when she has me locked up.

    She wouldn't be excited by the suggestion of using an artificial penis but I might be able to convince her if there is an enjoyable payoff for her. I've seen anecdotal evidence that some DO enjoy a different size, shape, width or maybe a longer lasting than I could ever hope to be for her.

    Thoughts?
     
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  2. locked_top
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    locked_top Caged tiger

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    I can't help you. We bought one, but she hasn't been interested in me using it yet.
     
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  3. Tom Allen
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    Tom Allen Member

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    I have no idea how we got started. Mrs Edge really doesn't care for toys. She discovered that she enjoyed keeping me locked up, and I probably suggested using some kind of dildo because she prefers PIV. I know we want through a bunch before discovering the Vixskin; I suspect that the very lifelike feel, plus a non-obtrusive harness made things okay for her.
     
  4. Jessica Alexander
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    Jessica Alexander Trans woman not a mistress or Dom

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    My mistress always seems to really enjoy it when we use it but she rarely asks for it and usually says no when I ask her if she wants me to get it out.
     
  5. Charles3451
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    Charles3451 Long term member

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    Have you considered that your wife may only get orgasms from clitoral stimulation? If that is the case it would be the reason she orgasms from oral sex. Maybe get a rampant rabbit to use on her so she gets both vaginal and clitoral stimulation.
     
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  6. ChasteCel
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    ChasteCel 7/6 on the TomAllen-Rectrix scale

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    Originally my wife seems to not have enjoyed it as much... but this could be because of the dildo we were using. Which then got ruined so I picked up a couple new ones.

    She seems to have really taken to a double-density silicone one from Tantus (based on a recommendation from @SingWithPain). So much so that in the 3-ish weeks since Christmas, we've had intercourse once and strap-on sex four times. I think we did the strap on a total of 4-5 times in 2019.
     
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  7. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    My keyholder isn’t too interested in toys. Or wasn’t.

    I talked to her about using a harness. She sort of agreed. I bought a SpareParts harness and a Vixskin. The first one was not large enough. I bought the next largest. Oh yea.

    You might think it is all about size and being stiff. For my keyholder, it is all about being able to focus on herself. She does not have to worry about me. Only herself. But, size apparently matters. I’m pretty sure anyway.

    When she gets into that frame of mind that a toy is ok, oh wow.

    For me, being able to bring her that much pleasure is beyond description. I will gladly trade every future orgasm to bring her to that level of pleasure. Even just once.

    There is nothing like witnessing a woman selflessly enjoying climax after climax.

    Give her time. Everyone recommends it’s not about your desires. It’s about her. And, it’s true.

    Follow Tom’s sage advice and warm up the dildo and lube first. Cold toys won’t make a good impression.

    When she gets the point of trying it, be prepared. It will mess with your mind like you can not imagine. You go through the motions, you see a cock plunging in and out, but, she is responding, there is no sensation. It takes me hours to come down. It is intense.

    Good luck.
     
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  8. Byrdie
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    Byrdie Junior Member
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    #8 Byrdie, Jan 15, 2020
    Last edited: Jan 15, 2020
    The second time I ever squirted / ejaculated was thanks to a woman using a strap-on with me, so I'm fine with them.

    However, if the person wearing it isn't that talented with their own penis, they're probably not going to be that great with a surrogate because they're going to be having less feedback regarding what they're rubbing against. At the same time, if the person wearing it is talented enough as is, but is:

    • being denied
    • locked
    • needs a little extra length
    • needs a little extra girth

    ... a strap-on can be a wonderful thing so long as their energy holds out.

    What's different? Well, unless I want a specialty one that ejaculates inside me, I'm the only one making a mess. I'm okay with that. Also, there's no cock-pulse/throb feeling. For folks who find that particularly pleasant, I can see how a strap-on would be disappointing. I'm usually having too much fun to notice.

    A.H. Dion even wrote a book about strap-on play.
     
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  9. Tom Allen
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    Tom Allen Member

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  10. Darkist
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    Darkist New member

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    I suggest the erocillator vibrator for those KH who prefer clitoral stimulation. You’ll keep it plugged in next to the bed ready to go. Be careful tho subs it may replace your tongue if your not diligent
     
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  11. Darkist
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    Darkist New member

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    We purchased a recycled bike tube harness on Etsy and I’ll swear by it it great Quality and easy to clean (Not sure why I didn’t put this in the first post too)
     
  12. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Long term member

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    99% of our sex involves me wearing a strap on! Whatever else we do she likes to finish with it! When she "wants it" she always tells or texts me "Get your strap on now!" The combination of oral sex, a vibrator, fingers and strap on enables Mrs Chaste to have anything from 2 to 5 orgasms! Now I don't think that's not bad for a woman knocking on for 60 and certainly much better than B.C (Before Chastity). She really seems more than happy! No fear of me "exploding" before she has had her fill and loosing my hard on! And she is completely in control. Another aspect she likes is the fact that once she has "finished" then she can just send me on my way or tease me if she wants. Me not having an orgasm is something she has really come to enjoy! I truly mean it when I say I prefer my wife's orgasms to my own! And if she never let me cum again I wouldn't mind as long as I got to continue being used by her for her pleasure!
     
  13. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    That seems to be the pattern developing for us as well.
     
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  14. Tom Allen
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    Tom Allen Member

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    Mrs Edge used to *enjoy* it that way, but over the last few years, she appears to actually *prefer* it this way.

    Again, I should point out that the Vixskin is exceedingly lifelike, and I warm it up to slightly higher than body temperature before we start (and I warm up the lube, as well). The harness is a Terra Firma from Stormy Leather, a very low profile harness that I can wear low on my hips for a very natural feel. I removed the backing pad on the harness to let the base of the Vixskin sit just over the cuff ring on my cage. This way, not only is my angle more natural, but the cage bumps against her ass - for some reason, that feeling just sends her over the edge.
     
  15. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    I know you were asking ladies but I would just like to offer that you are likely to get as many different responses as the number of women that choose to answer.
     
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  16. Her Dividend
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    Her Dividend Junior Member

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    Drop the question:

    "What do you think about strap-on play?"

    It says something if you don't feel that you can ask this.

    Generally, a woman has to like the idea of penetration. Keep in mind that if you go here, you need to be as clean as possible, because if the strap-on comes out dirty, its a major turn-off.
     
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  17. Tom Allen
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    Tom Allen Member

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    Umm... pretty sure that the OP was talking about strapon in the context of PIV. At least that's how I, and everybody else understood it.

    Also, in case you're new around here, not all men are in a kink friendly relationship. A lot of members come here looking for ideas on how best to approach their hesitant partners.
     
  18. Her Dividend
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    Her Dividend Junior Member

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    True, re reading the OP, he'd wear the strap on. If he's going to go there, he needs to ask about it. You can't skirt that reality.
     
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  19. b_quark
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    b_quark Long term member

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    We used to use a strap-on. She would have her orgasms that way, and then sometimes after that she would let me put my much much smaller penis inside her and quickly get off. Then she slowly weaned me off of that so that she would be satisfied and able to bask in the glow of it after without me ruining it with my tiny pecker. Now she only has 'sex' with her favorite, huge, very lifelike dildo, which I work for her while I also lick her clitoris. Whether I am locked or not, I am never ever allowed inside her at all anymore. If I am unlocked, and lucky, I am allowed to masturbate after she is satisfied and I have cleaned everything up.
     
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  20. sapper814
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    sapper814 Texan in Canada

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    when I have worn the strap on my wife has made noises and sounds I’ve never heard her make when it’s just my dick. We have two that we use. One is much longer than me, but about the same birth. The other is way thicker than me but similar in length. She enjoys them both, as well as my dick too. For her it’s all about her choice and what she want me to do for her. She knows it drives me wild hearing her moan and carry on with the other cocks, knowing I don’t feel a think. Loves coming and then makes me lick and suck the dildo clean while she false asleep. God I love the taste of her pussy on those cocks....thinks she might be training me for something else later.....:)
     
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  21. madams-sissysub
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    My madam has never had any interest in toys, she has a real cock to satisfy her when she wants, as mine is locked.
     
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  22. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    As a suggestion

    Meticulous preparation involving enemas is employed by porn participants before entering into anal penetration not so easy to do without practice

    For those lackng that area of expertise. on the point of withdrawl if the 'giver' covers it with a small towel as its extracted the whole thing could be put to one side for proper cleaning at a more appropriate time.
     
  23. Doug Scibor
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    Doug Scibor Long term member

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    Not sure where the anal play came into the thread. That is not in the discussion (as I presented the question) and she would never desire that.

    I'm sorry if that wasn't clear.
     
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  24. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    Well the reference was in my previous post on this thread.. i was just trying to offer some advice
     
  25. Tamed2019
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    Tamed2019 Active member

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    My wife really got off with me manipulating her dildo for her. She explained how she likes it as it proceeded to bring her to a hot O. Interesting that before the cage, I saw her with her dildo but never thought to participate. Now I look forward to the next session. She mentioned a strap on once. I need to refresh her memory on that.
     

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