Good morning CM, I am new into the chastity world as the keyholder. We have started with short sessions of wearing and had the first successful overnight wear. I am looking for advice from both key holders and wearers. what are some of your favorite things that have been done or said to you by your key holder during your wear time? to any key holders, what was your some of the methods you used and things you did to train your sissy/sub/wearer? I am looking for all the ideas to make this fun, exciting, and not boring. We are open to practically anything. I just don’t want to lock my man up with no end game. What makes it fun for you?
Generally the first 3 to 5 days locked I'm the horniest, any attention then is both desired and frustrating. Orgasms after 7 to 10 days are often much more intense. Tease as much as you are comfortable with, don't make it seem like work to you. My wife and I watched some chastity videos by Velvet Veronica together when we started. She got some great ideas there. Of course you could watch some without him so he doesn't know what's coming, or should I say, not cumming.
There is no right or wrong way to do this. My best advice is to have open and honest communication... even if that means you telling your partner they are talking to you about it too much. Find what makes you and your partner need to find what makes you happy with all of this... then try to meet somewhere in the middle.
I serve my Mistress (wife) and an online KH. Having two in the dominance role somewhat certainly keeps me very busy. That said my KH does use some interesting teasing and activities with the Chastity Maze forum and app. I have options to reduce a lock time (I have no idea how long they will ever be in the first place though) or increase in a game of chance if I choose. I can also incur tasks...some simple and some can be "uncomfortably" difficult . My locks require I check-in daily on the Internet. If I miss a check in (there is a small 10 min window), I will be put in "pillory) where other lockees in the community can vote on the consequences of my miss. I could be good or bad ...it could be a difficult task. My Mistress always ensures I complete all my tasks and update my KH accordingly .
I am new to this lifestyle as well and my wife is just starting to show a bit of authority which I know she finds difficult at times as historically she has not been an assertive woman. We’ve essentially swapped roles and are both enjoying exploring this together. I’ve been caged for about a month now with my wife as my KH. I would say there are two things my KH has done or said that stand out. Although it may sound like I’m telling an erotic story, it’s not my intent. I’m just trying to answer your question. It might also sound “vanilla” to some. The most intense thing for me so far was that after being locked for 5 days with only small verbal and fleeting touch teasing, she offered to wash my back while we were in the shower that turned into her body pressed against my back with her reaching around to help me clean myself while her hands were lathered. She ended up stroking my cage, using her finger to rub my tip through the hole at the end of the cage and giving my “gentlemen” some gentle, yet firm squeezing. When she was content, she just stopped, rinsed off and got out without a word leaving me caged for another few days. Second, after giving her a long relaxing rub at the end of the day she merely looked me in the eyes and said, “I want to watch you make yourself cum for me”. Unlocked me and simply watched.
Your tastes and fantasies are the ones that must prevail. You can receive opinions, but your wishes are the ones that matter. As a slave in chastity I like verbal humiliation and public humiliation (in closed groups that like this lifestyle). But I like nothing more is to see my Mistress happy and satisfied because she managed to do what she wanted and did not have to act to satisfy my patetic fantasy.
Remember she is the boss, but she has to do her part as well, this ain't Rom Popiel you can't set it and forget it lol
Really, anything that reminds him of it, and/or what he's being denied for the time being. Use it to improve communication. If he's subservient, have him do things for you. Talk up the things you like and he'll pay attention. Give him feedback on what you want, like or don't like. Have him earn his way out. Backrubs / foot rubs. You know it won't lead to sex, or if it does, it's more focused on you. He'll like the contact. Tease him: brush up against him, rub your butt on him when you pass, nibble his ear. Brush your hand against his cage in public, (test it, first!). Have him show it to you from time to time. Play with the key when you talk to him. If you're on the phone, let him hear it slide on the chain (Assuming you wear it on a necklace). After you take a shower, have him put the necklace back on you and close the clasp. Wear the key on an ankle bracelet when you wear sandals or go barefoot. Have him kneel and give you a foot rub. Put the cage on him while you're both out. Find a discrete (or not, if you're into that) way to have him put it on. Even a restroom, by himself, (or if he gets too excited when you're touching him). Have him wear it when you have a friend over, and make sure he doesn't make himself scarce. Disclosing it to your friend is a whole other subject. When your friend leaves, tell him you have (or had) the hots for your friend, get him thinking of you and her (or him) togeather. Let him know that it excites you, and what it is about it that does. Tell him the crazy things you'd do to him, or make him do, now that he belongs to you.
Play games of chance... It increases the stimulation and anticipation (for both of you). Keep it simple and it's less work for you and more risk for him. Use chance to determine things like: "no release before days", "extra lockup time for punishment days", "extra time just because days", "number of orgasms you must give me before I even think about releasing you", "number of chores you must do before", ... you get the idea! Choosing a random number can be as simple as having a number of dice, and using the first single dice roll to determine how many more dice you will roll to add them all up. If you can calculate the odds beforehand, then it makes it all the more predictable for you and less so for him. So with three dice say, adding them together gives a possible range of between 1+1+1=3 and 6+6+6=18, and multiplying them together gives between 1x1x1=1 and 6x6x6=216. Another popular way is to use a bag containing coloured balls (or pieces of paper). Have many more blue balls than red balls - you can adjust the number of each as you deem fit, or he can earn changing the odds in his favour, or be penalised having the odds moved against him. The innuendo is intentional, he gets to pick blue balls or red balls! And of course you can cheat, you make the rules! Get a double sided penny, and a real one as well then you can sometimes spin the real one, and sometimes the biased one; Or only have one colour of balls in the bag! He'll think it's just bad luck but will be eager to continue playing the game (there's always a chance, however slim), but you'll be more in control than he even realises - what fun!