Introduction and question

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Kroskris, Nov 3, 2018.

  1. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    Hi to the group.
    I started my first lock up on October 4th and have been 24/7, minus supervised cleaning, ever since. Tried a resin cage first but that requires too much cleaning, steel is the way to go.
    I'm in my 50's and I cannot believe how great I feel, it's like I drank from the fountain of youth! I feel 20 year's younger. Lots of energy even started working out again.
    I went solo for the first 10 days to see if I could handle a cage. Then I explained it to my wife, who had noticed all the changes in me. I was a much nicer person to be around, our marriage had been on the rocks. When I offered her the keys she snatched them with a smile. It's been great and frustrating, in a good way.
    My questions to the group, do these changes last? Did any of you experience these effects? Will an orgasm bring a crash?
     
  2. Jail Bird
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    Jail Bird Member

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    Welcome.
    I think everyone has their own story of how being in a belt made them feel. I felt the same way as you and still do. Been going on 8 years now and miss wearing my belt if it's off. I get excited/erect seeing it on the counter before I put it back on. In our WLM my wife is the one who does the locking. It's much easier for us to put our belts on then to have them try to do it. Once I'm in it, my wife cinches my lock and places her numbered plastic security tag on me. I'm doubled locked. There's nothing more exciting and heart pounding than watching your wife on her knees cinching your lock and looping her security tag on me. The final check is her tugging on the security tag to make sure it cinched and her looking up at you a saying , "there, you're protected" :)

    Good luck, have fun. Your wife is about to see a whole new submissive side of you.
     
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  3. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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  4. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    8 years! Wow. That gives me hope these feelings aren't just temporary. I do enjoy being locked, and it still amazes me.
    Thanks for your reply.
     
  5. Ma’ams Slut
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    Ma’ams Slut OWNED, LOCKED, SUB TO MY LOVE MA’AM M

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    Welcome to cm
     
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  6. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Active member

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    Certainly isn't a temporary thing in our case! Chastity (for me that is), has become our normal way of life! That doesn't make it any less fun it just means everyday life is more fun! And frustrating. Which is as it should be! So nice to be protected from being led astray by all those loose women in our wicked world. Well that's how Mrs Chaste puts it to me!
     
  7. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Active member

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    Welcome to CM and welcome to your new life. Yes, so long as your wife remains interested the changes will last. I so understand your fountain of youth comment, and share your observation about how it improves your marriage to have her holding your key and controlling your erection and your masturbation. You and your wife will also learn that orgasms must be greatly limited because there is a hormonal crash that, at our age, lasts for several days; that crash can be shortened by immediate relocking and dedicated submissive service to her.

    Good luck, and hope to hear from you regularly. And maybe your wife will like to join too?
     
  8. sissyblueballs
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    sissyblueballs Active member

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    Welcome. Yes, in our (my) case, a crash is normal and to be expected. We try and factor that in. You'll find your own "groove" eventually.
     
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  9. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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    yes it does and its best not to have one. its better being milked I think now.
     
  10. Drews
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    Drews Member

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    I had the same effects as you when I started wearing the cage. I think you need to have a discussion with your wife about what she wants. Some wives prefer long periods without release which is great for some couples. My wife noticed that I was not only much nicer and caring but when she did unlock me our sex was amazing for both of us. She said it feels like we were 20 years ago. She fought the device for months and did not even want to see it. Now she refers to it is something I wear for her. I do have a slight crash but quickly get locked afterwards and it does not last long plus I enjoy my wife being so happy and satisfied, something I have not been able to do in a long time before the cage. It is so much better than the old days of masturbation habit. Good luck and always make sure wife is the main focus.
     
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  11. HeavyFeather
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    HeavyFeather Member

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    Her taking it from me has been the best thing ever for us and me. It’s much better to not have access to it. Everyday, She is at the center. Chastity reinforces Her control. It’s just one of her tools, but it has been the most beneficial. As long as you remain committed to serving her, I think the ‘high’ you describe will sustain.
     
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  12. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    Thanks for your reply, and thanks for the immediate relocking idea, I will mention that to my wife. I'm really worried about the crash, it tends to make me an asshole.
    Speaking of asshole I royally pissed her off the day I was going to get out to play after 30 days locked. Now I stay locked until my birthday December 3rd. I deserve it of course. Somehow it bothers me more that I upset her.
     
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  13. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Active member

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    It's good that's she's strict and committed to using her key to improve your behavior and make you a better husband and improve your marriage. And you should be more bothered that you upset her by being an asshole than by her punishment -- that's growth. Let her lead, she'll show you the way.
     
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  14. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    You are definitely right, she's enjoying the the power of the key. We've tried various kink play over the years, but nothing really excited her much, but as a KH she's noticed the change in me and that's what she really likes. Plus the almost daily neck , shoulder and foot rubs are a big hit.
     
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  15. Drews
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    Drews Member

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    Let her know how upset you are about the situation and apologize. Do not ask for an earlier release date. I know the asshole feeling after the crash, I have the same problem. I do see how happy I make her with my performance after she keeps me locked and try to focus on her happiness, it really helps. She is like the girl I married many years ago.
     
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  16. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    Thanks for your reply. I'm glad your life is going so well, inspiring to me. It seems like a win win that I hope to emulate.
    I however will be locked for a while, she likes the change in me but doesn't trust me yet. Things were very bad in our marriage for sometime. I am lucky I found out about chastity before it was too late..
     
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  17. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    I not only apologised, got flowers, wine,
    and was on my knees. She saw it was more stupidity than intentionally trying to hurt her. That's what saved me, but it's still a set back.
    I also see her as the girl i married over 30 years ago, we're actually making out again and she is really enjoying the attention. I am trying to keep the focus on her, and it takes some getting used to.
     
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  18. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    Thanks for replying. I hope you are right. I plan on trying my best.
     
  19. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    I'm sure that works, but my wife is to vanilla to try that. She might enjoy doing a ruin on me though.
     
  20. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Active member

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    Think about that -- you've been married 30 years and "it takes some getting used to" for your focus to be on her. We can become so distant when the daily days pile up and take each other for granted, and solo sexual relief, masturbating, only makes it worse. Making out again is so cool. You're lucky you found the cage and even luckier that she loves you enough and loves the changes in you that she's seeing to hold the key and to use it to improve your marriage. Women are so much better at relationships!
     
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  21. Joey love
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    Joey love Active member

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    I was making out with my wife the other day and it was great and I had also thought how it had been a while. Then she let me give her a nice long foot massage. I gotta admit I think I enjoyed it more than her!!
     
  22. Living Curious
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    Living Curious Long-term lockee

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    The post-orgasm crash is purely physiological and not something that can be prevented. You can't speed up the time it takes your body to find equilibrium again but you can learn what the crash does to you and find techniques to try and actively counter those unwanted attitude changes.
    The crash is different for everyone and can vary in severity and duration from person to person. It's also something that can vary in intensity and duration for the same person each time. Some men are tragically depressed for several days and some men don't feel anything because it's less intense.
    I'm with @jemima at this point in my life. Better just to avoid it altogether!
     
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  23. Kroskris
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    Kroskris New member

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    Thanks for the reply. I haven't had a crash yet, so i will need to experiment to see how i react. It helps to know what might happen so i can be prepared.
     
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  24. Joey love
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    Joey love Active member

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    I like the experiment idea
     
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  25. DonnaSue
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    DonnaSue Active member

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    For us, it's been a 5 year experiment. From honor system to longterm lockups and everything in between. And those Post O crashes took their effect, too. I am now locked up from the time I get out of the shower in the morning until She gets home from work at 5:30. (She really sees the cage as a wank prevention device!) I am milked periodically to make me docile and to thus prevent the crashes. I don't seem to mind that very much.

    The point is that each couple evolves based on their relationship and their communications. We found that open communication is the key and we can work through any problems that arise.
     
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