Into the Wild

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  1. Ms.Linda
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    Into the Wild

    I answered a classified ad in our local newspaper. That was 19 years ago. Who could have predicted that it would turn out like this? True, during those first late night phone calls he had held nothing back. What did he have to lose? We had never met face to face and if my reaction wasnt favorable, all he had to do was disconnect and it would be over. So, he laid it all out for me. He liked bondage. Blindfolds, gags, tight restraints. He was kinky. Probably more so than anyone I had ever met. He had a sense of adventure and wasnt afraid to try anything at least once. I thought I could handle that. I mean, how bad could it be? Different would be a nice change. My last relationship had been so unadventurous. The guy actually thought kinky meant girl on top! So, I was ready for a change. Or so I thought.

    After a week of talking on the phone, we decided it was time to meet face to face. I chose a supper club near my home where most of the patrons and the staff knew me by name. It made me feel safer meeting someone for the first time on my terms. I had arrived earlier than our scheduled time. Standing behind the swinging kitchen door, I peered out. Watching. Waiting. I knew it was him the moment he walked in. He didnt belong. In a bar full of regulars, he stuck out horribly. My heart was racing. My palms were clammy. I was breathing like I had just completed a marathon. What now? My brain kept repeating. But I already knew the answer. I had to introduce myself. So, taking a deep breath, I released my grasp on the door and strode out to the bar, up to the stool he was sitting on, thrust out my right hand, and introduced myself. That was the beginning of my journey.

    We began dating and little by little, mostly without my even being aware of it, he introduced me to his world. One night, several months into our relationship, he showed up at my house with a bag full of chains and locks. My initiation into bondage. He gently restrained my wrists and ankles all the while telling me how exciting he found bondage. He explained that a blindfold allowed his mind to be free. To be wherever and whoever he wanted to be. To say I was a bit anxious would be an understatement. But the evening turned out to be one of the most exciting I had ever experienced.

    Soon, we moved in together and I got my first taste of what kinky really meant. Having come from a very vanilla upbringing I was quite naive when it came to kink. I knew that there were alternative lifestyles out there, but I didnt think I would ever find myself smack dab in the middle of one. Bit by bit more and more things began to surface. I soon learned that in addition to bondage, he was very much into getting a reaction from me. One evening in particular, I arrived home from work, walked into the living room only to find him seated on the couch dressed only in my underwear. Outwardly, I was calm and only smiled at him. Inside, I was screaming what have I gotten myself into?. His requested for bondage increased exponentially. I would come home from work, shopping, etc. to find him bound and gagged waiting for me. Several times, I snapped and beat him unmercifully. Only to discover that the beating was what he had been hoping for. Our actual sex life began to diminish. Replaced by more and more bondage and discipline.
     
  2. Ms.Linda
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    Then, came the chastity request. At first, I thought he was kidding. I could not imagine that a man would willingly elect to have his most precious parts locked away. He must have sensed that I was not ready for this step and jokingly dismissed it. But, as time went on, he would approach the subject again to gauge my reaction. Finally, after about five years of this, in a moment of anger, I ordered the Loris #9 he had been pushing for. His reaction was one of some surprise, He didnt think I would actually go through with it. Unfortunately, when it arrived, we were both sorely disappointed. Long term wear was a myth. The bulk of it made wearing it not only uncomfortable, but painful as well. Hygiene was another problem. The device would have to be removed daily and since I was unable to replace it without his help, the point of chastity was somewhat negated.

    About the same time the chastity was ordered, he introduced me to a chastity site on line. There, for the first time, I saw many men in many forms of womens attire. Most in a chastity device. Others waiting for devices to be delivered. Still others dreaming of what it would be like to be locked away. I was curious and excited. Here was a whole community of men just like him and women that were what I wanted to be. How wrong I was. Most of these men were nothing like him. They were serving dominant women willingly. They were eager to do the bidding of another. They wanted nothing more than to see the approval of their significant other. My man, on the other hand, was entranced by the thought of being an unwilling participant, forced to do my bidding. To become my doormat by the sheer force of my hand. How could this be? I am a kind, big hearted, accommodating person. I dont know how to force another to bend to my will. I have always gone out of my way or done without to make others happy. Forcing someone to do my bidding was beyond my comprehension.

    We fought. Many times to the brink of separation. I was torn between who I believed I really was and who he believed I could be. I wanted to make him happy but it seemed to go against everything I had ever been taught or believed. Then came two weeks apart, I was house sitting for a friend. Out of town. Our communication consisted of texting. Which we did constantly. His texts always about what our life could be like if I would only take the bull by the horns, prove to him I could control him, force him to obey me. For ten days he badgered and goaded me. For ten days I tried to reason with him. On the three hour drive home, I knew something big was going to come of this. I knew I would arrive home to find him restrained and waiting for me. What I didnt know was how powerful my reaction to that would be.
     
  3. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    I entered the house. All was quiet with the exception of the television. On the counter was a 17 page letter to me outlining everything that he expected if our relationship was to survive. I read. Slowly. Digesting every word and the meaning behind it. Growing angrier with each paragraph. I walked into the living room to find him securely bound, blindfolded, and gagged. His wrists handcuffed tightly behind his back. His ankles bound by chain and lock. He sat quietly on the corner of the couch, waiting. I finished reading and quietly set the papers aside. Rising, I went into our bedroom and retrieved my tawse. Something I had only used a few times before. I feared it for the raw power it contained. I strode back into the living room, tawse in hand. Grabbing him by the ear, I hurled him forward onto the floor. His right shoulder took the brunt of the hit scrapping the skin from it in a huge rug burn. And I began hitting him. Over and over I swung the tawse, not caring where it landed. The slapping sound was intoxicating. His muffled cries were like a drug to me. The more he cried, the harder I swung. I could already see the welts rising. His flesh turning red, blue, purple, green. I stopped swinging long enough to grab the strap from the ball gag in his mouth. I pulled, hard, forcing him to a seated position, holding his head high in the air. I leaned forward and hissed in his ear, Im leaving your sorry ass. Then tossed him back to the floor. His cries of physical pain became howls of disbelief. He begged, although Im not sure what for as the gag kept me from understanding and my anger kept me from caring. I walked out the door. Standing in the yard, I began to calm a bit. I looked inside and saw him curled in a fetal position, his body wracked with sobs and criss-crossed with the deepening marks of my anger. My heart sank as my brain screamed. There, lying on the floor, beaten, bleeding, and defeated was my husband. The man I love. The one I would do anything for. Then, I realized, I had just given him exactly what he had been begging and pleading for. I opened the door and went back inside. I carefully removed his blindfold and took the gag from his mouth. His eyes burned into mine as he demanded that I release him. I was taken aback. Here I was feeling badly that I had hurt him so, and he was growling at me like a mad dog. I resolved to keep him in his restraints until he had calmed down and accepted this position.

    He screamed, He howled, He cursed. He threatened. Then, he reasoned. He begged. He pleaded. After what seemed like an eternity to me, he had finally calmed down enough for me to feel secure releasing him. It was then that I had a chance to inspect the damage I had done to his body. The bruises were profound. After carving its way across his thigh, the end of one of the thin leather straps had found his left testicle. It was a horrible shade of greenish blue with a half inch long, bleeding cut on it. The outside of his left thigh was slashed, welted, bruised and bleeding in places. His lower back and buttocks hadnt fared much better. But, before me sat a quiet, contrite, defeated man.

    In bed that night, he held me tighter than he had in years. The following morning, I was awakened by him standing at the side of the bed with my mornings first cup of coffee. This was something I had expressed to him many times that I would love for him to do, but until that day he had not done it. I rose and accepted the mug. This may have been the best cup of coffee that I had ever had. We made our way to the living room, then out to the back yard where we sat at the table and discussed the prior evening. To me, his attitude was much more acceptable. I decided that since he had made such a quantum leap, I would need to reward it. I also began to form a plan for our lives from this day forward. I announced to him that we were going to have a girls day out. Knowing his penchant for cross dressing, I decided to take him shopping. We began by hitting a small boutique near our home. Shirts, undergarments, and lingerie. We moved on to another store. More shirts, beautiful blouses, summer wear, short shorts. I watched his face as he scanned each item I handed him. His eyes sparkled at the lush pinks, the lace decorations, the ribbons. He held each as if it were a treasure. At the final store we found jeans. Real womens jeans with sparkly belts and fancy stitching on the back pockets. His face beamed. Once we arrived home, he tried each and everything on. Turning this way and that in front of me. Marveling at the fit and the feel. As he removed each piece of clothing, I straightened and hung it. When he was finished, I gathered all the items together and retreated to our guest room informing him that from now on, this would be his room. The only clothing available to him would be that which was in this room. All female. His male clothing was securely locked away in what previously had been our bedroom.

    Over the next several days, I transformed the guest room into a perfectly pink sissy paradise. I sewed lace on comforter edges. I made draperies from cotton candy pink material and decorated them with lace and sequined butterflies. I replaced all the wall hangings with butterflies and flowers. Yards of lace. Yards of fluff, Beads, boas, feathers, sequins. When not working on the room, I was adding to his wardrobe. Two lovely pink maids dresses and a lacey pair of pantaloons. I altered some of the purchased items for a better fit and embellished a few more with lace and ribbon.

    Then, I went to work on what was now MY room. I replaced all the old draperies, table covers and bedding. This room would be mine, and mine alone. I proudly hung my collection of whips, floggers, canes, and paddles on the wall. I had him install a set of cuffs on the wall above his shoulder level and a set of eyebolts at the baseboard. Perfect for locking him spread eagle. Right in front of the window. I had him replace the lock on the door and hand me both keys. Black, white, leather, and lace. This was turning into the room of my dreams. I was loving it.

    I had invited him into my room on a couple of occasions. The first was to have him test out the shackles on the wall. While he was there, I teased him about piercing his bellybutton. This is something that I had often teased about. I had, in fact, purchased a beautiful crystal dangling butterfly that I had taunted him with on several occasions. I had also recently purchased a piercing kit which was delivered before my return from house sitting. I left it sitting in plain view. We had talked about it many times and it was one of the things he found very intriguing. But maybe more in a fantasy way than reality. Then, three days ago, in the morning, I invited him into my room again. I restrained him to the bed this time. On his back. While he was waiting for what he thought would be a tease and denial session, I entered the room carrying the piercing kit. His reaction was almost exactly what I had anticipated. His body became immediately aroused as he begged me not to do it. I placed the forceps on the spot where the needle would be run through. His eyes grew larger. Then, he began to play on my vulnerability telling me I couldnt go through with it. Since I had never pierced anyone or anything before I was a bit nervous and his talking obliterated any shred of confidence I had. Before long I put the kit away and released him. We made our way outside to the table and began talking. He knew I had lost my nerve and played on it unmercifully. I sat there feeling like the biggest failure in the world. I KNEW he wanted this. I KNEW the pain meant nothing to him. Why couldnt I bring myself to do something so simple? As he went on and on chiding me, something within me snapped. Yes! He does want this. Yes! Pain is a state of mind for him. But mostly YES! He DESERVES this!

    After an hour or so had passed, I once again invited him into my room. He assumed he would be getting the tease and denial he had been shorted out of previously. I let him believe that as I placed the blindfold over his eyes. After securely taping his mouth shut, I left the room to gather the necessary things I had forgotten the first time. Alcohol for sterilizing the area, a paper towel to set things on, cotton balls for dabbing any blood.
    I returned and set everything out next to him on the bed. When I opened the alcohol and began wiping the area around his navel, he began to squirm. I told him I needed him to be perfectly still so that I wouldnt get the piercing off center. He laid there, thinking I was only pushing his limits again. I climbed up onto the bed, took the forceps in my left hand and gently pinched the skin above his nave. With my right hand, I removed the needle from its sterile package and placed the point against his skin. I felt his back stiffen as the sharp tip poked him. I asked him one last timeare you sure? He nodded and whimpered behind his gag. I shoved the needle through. He moaned in pain but remained perfectly still as I had instructed. I placed the jewelry in and secured the ball to the end of the barbell. I used a Q-tip and the cotton to gently swab the area. Once I was sure he was settled, I removed the blindfold and gag. He stared at me in disbelief. He hadnt really thought I would actually go through with it! Well, he has a barbell in his navel to prove that I will and I did.

    Its been over two weeks now since Ive returned home and administered that beating. Some of the bruises are still visible. I havent done dishes or made a pot of coffee since. Ive allowed him to sleep in my bed since the piercing since my bed is far softer than his. That will come to an end as soon as he heals. My estimate is by the weekend. He still throws little hints my way that he would like things to progress a bit faster, but I remind him that we are playing on my turf now! If he gets out of hand, theres always the wall shackles and a cane. The tawse Ill save for serious infractions!
     
  4. maid madeleine
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    maid madeleine Senior Member

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    Wow. This is a great read. Thanks for sharing. maid madeleine xo

    :chores012:
     
  5. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    Ms. Linda, I'm so pleased you have given us the complete picture of your life.

    I knew I'd seen you around here more often lately, and I'm so happy for you and the way things are going.

    We're always here to support you, and hopefully soon I will make that trip to see you and Ms Michelle.

    :anim_26:
     
  6. Rachel
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    Rachel Owned by Mistress Michelle

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    Ms Linda just wanted to thank You for sharing Your story. :happy0030:

    Rachel
     
  7. Mistress Michelle
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    Mistress Michelle Magical Mistress

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    Ms Linda,
    For as long as we have been chatting I have always known your tiff is more than a handful, but I have to say...speaking in sentances in YM in no way compares to reading it like this. WOW
    I think you have a whole lot more in you than I do, I would not have been able to tolerate all that tiff has put you through but we can all see from your story how strong you have become because of it. I am looking forward to the continuation of your journel Linda.

    Mistress Michelle
     
  8. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    Yes, tiff has been and can still be quite a handful. But, as I once heard somewhere....what doesn't kill us makes us stronger! LOL

    Ms. Watchful- Even tho something has come up every time Mistress Michelle and I have tried to make plans to get together, rest assured that when you decide to make the trip NOTHING will get in the way!!!
     
  9. Miss D
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    Miss D Expert In Femming

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    I had to read your account twice, Ms Linda - and I must say, it stirred up several different emotions on my part. I sense the heat of your anger - pent up over a very long time and released in quite short order. A cleansing for you, perhaps - and certainly a shocking surprise for tiff.

    I've always thought that sissy gurls, at some point in their life, reach a kind of tipping point where their need for femming finally overwhelms their sense of shame. Perhaps, the events you described were a kind of tipping point for you - pushed until you reached a tipping point and your Domme side took over. I wonder how tiff will be over the long term now that her bedroom is suitably ultra-sissy and she is outfitted with such a lovely sissy wardrobe. I suppose, we will find out in the ensuing weeks and months.

    Thank you for such a vivid and emotional post. You are clearly in charge now and I don't think tiff will be forgetting that anytime soon.
     
  10. Sissy_Aline
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    Sissy_Aline Senior Member

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    GREAT writing

    Ms. Linda,

    Powerful writing from a Domme who wants to put things in perspective. tiff is lucky to be with You, Ma'am. This is a second read-over piece. Your decisions are so sound.

    Can i beg for more follow-up on this someday?

    Aline :butterfly:
     
  11. dollyanne
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    dollyanne Sissy who loves pink frilly things!

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    Ms Linda, thank You for this riveting, well-written, and heart-felt story. What an up and down and sideways roller-coaster of an experience! It sounds like it has been such an emotional catharsis for both of you, and dollyanne is sooo glad things seem to be working out in the end. Dollyanne admires You for having the inner strength and courage to work Your way through such a challenging time! Thank You so much for sharing this real-life amazing adventure with us.

    Deep Curtsey,
    :butterfly:
    dollyanne
     
  12. susie q
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    susie q Dear friend of the Mistress Michelle clan

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    Wow Ms Linda i type this with my jaw on the floor what a wonderful account of your lifestyle.I know we have never chatted alot but everytime i saw you online i would get very excited becouse it was always a pleasure.As you know im under Mistress Michelles control now and have felt tiffs homemade paddle that you gave her (very nice by the way)i as many im sure cant wait to read more thank you for taking the time to share with us all.My goodness Ms Linda,Mistress Michelle,and Mistress Watchful all together at once what a wonderfully scary concept. A giant curtsey Ms Linda. :party0042:
     
  13. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    Thank you A/all. Sometimes it's a bit difficult to see where someone is going when you don't know where they've been. Hence, the background. Please, don't misunderstand. This is not over. tiff would NEVER just give up or give in. The beating she received the night I got home was only one of many that she has gotten over the years. I must say, however, that this time she is actually "being good" much longer than in the past! Honestly, I rejoice in the small victories. I still haven't made a pot of coffee, done dishes, or made a meal. To Me, those are major mile stones! Any progress made with tiff is a reason to rejoice!!!
     
  14. Miss D
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    Miss D Expert In Femming

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    I guess this drama underscores a point - it seems that the harsher tiff's consequences are for failure, the longer her attitude remains adjusted... That does seem to make sense and it clearly seems to work.

    :smilies_xxx02:
     
  15. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    04/25/09

    Just a quick update for this past week. As much as I love looking at the barbell in tiffiny's bellybutton, I am beginning to question the wisdom in piercing it. It's been a little over a week and she is still complaining that it hurts. Now, I know that the navel is one of the longest healing piercings, but I would have thought it would be well on it's way by now. On the other hand, maybe a certain someone is just milking this out! Or maybe I'm just anxious to get that pretty, pink crystal butterfly in there!
    To keep myself busy during this (rotten) healing period, I made a visit to the fabric store. I found a lovely pattern for a Little Bo Peep costume. With a few adjustments it will make a beautiful dress for my darling. I picked out a shiny black satin for the major part of the dress and a sparkly white satin for contrast. It definitely shows potential. I'll post pictures when it's finished.
     
  16. Sissy_Aline
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    Sissy_Aline Senior Member

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    Ms. Linda,

    tiffiny is a very lucky gurl to be under your supervision in Your home. Having a dress made especially for her is a wonderful thing to do and have. i reread Your story once more and it is so powerful.


    Hope that the healing is coming along - after the first week, generally the real healing begins to take place.

    tiff is lucky lucky lucky.

    Aline :butterfly:
     
  17. PT109
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    PT109 Senior Member

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    Ms. Linda,
    Your story is very interesting. I guess most D/s relationships have there ups and downs but yours is as tensely edgy as any I have read about. I do have a thought about the punishment. Do you think that Tiff really desires such harsh punishment or is he "testing" you and trying your patience until you can feel justified and angry enough to punish him. I don't mean to seem like I know what is good for either of you, but in my Mistress and my relationship, the punishment is always independent of any provocation. If she were to determine that I was misbehaving in order to provoke her to punish me I would probably never get another whipping. I don't know why we sissies need to be punished but it seems to be the case with all or at least most of us. It needs to be fairly frequent, maybe so that we can be subservient. It's a perverse psychological thing but it seems to be true. Punish us and we will worship you. When our Domme continues to punish and humiliate us we continue to recognize (from some place deep within us) her as our superior. My Mistress punishes me for no reason whenever she feels like it. It is understood between us that it is always up to her and the fact that she continues to do it means to me that she continues to love me and want me as her submissive husband. Saving the punishment until the sub starts to negatively act up may end up causing a lot of unnecessary angst and more importantly draining the Domme's patience and good will for no good reason. It might even qualify in some peoples mind as topping from the bottom. Please forgive my impudence for making these remarks and ignore them if they are off target.
     
  18. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    pt109- to answer your question...yes on both accounts. tiff does desire the extremely harsh punishments. she definitely knows which buttons to push and does it quite effectively. Usually when she feels things are not progressing quickly enough or she is feeling a bit neglected. Unfortunately, I have a hard time punishing for no reason. To me there always has to be some infraction. I do realize that it should be my prerogative and there is not always a need, just a desire. I'm working on that.
     
  19. Mistress Michelle
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    Mistress Michelle Magical Mistress

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    Hummmmm....I got an idea!!
    Ms Linda...You punish tiff when shes bad and let Me whip her just for the fun of it!! LMAO
    Mistress Michelle
     
  20. PT109
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    PT109 Senior Member

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    I like the way your mind works Mistress Michelle.
     
  21. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    MM- That works for me! Between the both of us, I think We could whip her into shape!!
     
  22. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    I found this thread quite by accident this morning and decided that I would update if for anyone that was interested,

    So, here it is, October already. Having just returned home from being at O/our summer place for the past 6 months, it seems that there is so much to do.,
    For those of you that don't know, I live at home with tiff for the winter months and spend the summers about 90 miles north of home. tiff stays home due to work but visits whenever she has time off from work or vacation. W/we keep in contact daily via texts and phone calls. Anyway, back about 11 weeks ago, tiff became enamoured with the idea of permanent chastity. I wrote a brief thread on that. Since she is the one that will be wearing the device, I let her do the research and come up with what she felt would work best. she decided on the FL6J from Centurian. It is a sterling silver sheath held in place by a frenum pierceing. I ordered it and was told it would talk 4-6 weeks to arrive. After the 6 weeks had passed, and W/we hadn't received it, I called the company. They told me they were still waiting for it but it should be in the mail the following week. i waited the 10 days I was told it would take to arrive after having been shipped. Once again, it didn't come. I called again and the gentleman I spoke with asked me to call the following day as he wanted to see just where the order had ended up. As it turned out, the person in charge of shipping had left it on her desk where it had been sitting for the past two weeks. When I spoke to the gentleman this past Friday, he apologized and said he would send it out personally UPS next day air. It arrived today, When I opened the package, it took my breath away, It is definately a thing of beauty! I have posted some pictures of it in my profile.

    tiff immediately put it on and has had it on for the past 5 hours with no problems whatsoever. she says most of the time she isn't even aware it's there. W/we haven't done the piercing as yet due to wanting to make sure W/we had the proper alignment, I suggested that she wear it for a couple of days to make sure the fit is right, then do the piercing. I'm figuring that will take about 4-6 weeks to fully heal. During that time, I will be contemplating ordering the break-off screws that will lock the chastity permanently in place Because this is such a life altering thing W/we have both decided to proceed very cautiously and slowly.

    In other news, W/we are both extremely excited to be attending Mistress Michelle's fall gathering this year. This will be the first time either of us has attended anything of this sort and we are so looking forward to it, tiff, being the wood crafts man that she is has taken on the task of building a whipping bench for Mistress Michelle. I can't say much more than it is a sight to behold. After the gathering, I will post pictures of it. .Of course, her deciding to take on this task puts the Queening Chair she promised me on the back burner for now. I'm going to be patient for that because I want Mistress Michelle to have this bench as much as tiff wants to build it for her! The chair will come when W/we get home.
     
  23. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    Wow - permanent chastity, what a mindblower!

    :jumping0044:

    Very "tiff" though! :spankwhip:
     
  24. Ms.Linda
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    Ms.Linda No longer a member

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    Well, the chastity is now in it's forth day. Problems and irritations are minimal. From all indications this one is a winner! I believe W/we are going to hold off on the piercing until after the Fall Gathering. I don't think there would be sufficient time for proper healing and would not want to deprive Mistress Michelle of tiffiny at her finest! The chastity itself will, however, remain in place. The anticipation of the Fall Gathering is so thick here you can almost see it in the air. tiffiny is acting like a little kid on Christmas Eve! Of course, to say I was any less excited would probably be an untruth!
    The work on the bench she is making for Mistress Michelle is consuming most of her time. And, the ideas are ever more evolving. she has such a devious mind!
     
  25. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    Not long now till party time! :sex024::manga_devil:
     
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