I am a male married for over 20 years with a much younger wife. Unlike me, she had very little sexual experience when we met. As is often the case with that combination, after 15 years of marriage my wife became curious about being with another man. We dabbled in swinging. We had some good experiences but discovered we are not swingers because we both needed a deeper connection with a person before we could have sex with them. My wife REALLY hit it off with the husband of one of the couples we met but never played with. They became friends and she communicated with him regularly with my knowledge. Their connection grew deeper. One day she showed me the website blog "iplayhewaits". It was the first time I heard the term cuckold. She said, "I think the man of this one couple we met is a cuckold. She had me read 4 or 5 articles to learn about the cuckold lifestyle. After reading them I jokingly asked if she wanted to cuckold me. I was shocked when she said, "To be able to play with other men while you remained totally faithful and never touch another woman, hell ya I'd want that." I had a dream that night about her with another man while I watched. Maybe it was a mistake to tell her about the dream and that I woke up with a hard on. A couple months later she showed me some articles she found online about couples where the woman decides when the man gets to have an orgasm. Again maybe it was a mistake but I admitted getting hard as I read them. I didn't understand why but I did. About a month after that I went away for a business trip and didn't get myself off for five days because I was just too busy and too tired when I finished work. She went on and on about how great the sex was upon my return. The next day she commented again how great the sex was the night before and said maybe you should wait 5 days more often. Then she said why don't we try what some couples do and let me decide when you can come. I didn't understand why but I was turned on by the idea, so I agreed. We agreed to give it a month and see how it went. The first time she made me wait only 3 days. I was surprised how turned on I would get when we had sex and she would get off several times then tell me I couldn't. I didn't admit how much I enjoyed being denied. She is too nice and could not say no for more than 2 or 3 days. I suggested we take the decision away from her by drawing numbers out of a hat. She decided to use playing cards and put an ace through 10 on the table and drew one. She sealed it in an envelope with the date she drew it. She wouldn't tell me what it was until after I was allowed my release. Then she would open the envelope in front of me, draw another card and repeat the process. The first time she drew a 3 and the second time a 2. The third time however, she drew a 10. She immediately recognized the benefits to her around day 5 but she didn't tell me until after my release. She explained to me how she noticed that I became far more attentive to her around day 5. She went on to say, "and after that it just got better and better." She declared, "We are no longer going to play the game and you are not going to cum more than once every 4 or 5 days from now on. How long you have to wait beyond that will be depend on how well you treat me." We never discussed the one month trial period. We started having more sex then ever before, pretty much every day. I would quickly get a hard on, she would use it to get off 4 or 5 times then kiss me and go to sleep. The first month or two I was allowed to cum twice a month and after that it was once a month. Then she showed me this meme and said she didn't even realize what had happened to her until she saw this. She said once she read it she realized "Wow that has happened to me." It said, "When we started this I would consider carefully how often I should let you cum. Now I don't really even think about it much. Your frustration rarely occurs to me anymore." For about a year we used the honor system. She would know if I came early so I never attempted to cheat. She commented now and then that she should get one of those chastity devices. Then I was away on a business trip and she sent me an email and told me to buy a chastity device. "You are to wear it through security on your flight home" she added. I was not okay with that and she agreed it would be okay to have it delivered to our home. I was surprised she made me wear it for 24 hours the very first time. The next time she made me wear it when I went on a 3 day business trip. The next time was a 4 day business trip. She sent along a key in a sealed envelope in case of an emergency but I never had to open the envelope. She has me wear it around the house for 3 or 4 days now and then. When I go away it is understood I will wear it the entire time I am away from her. This is now my life.
I married a virgin and like you we both learned that we need some sort of emotional bond with sex partners to really enjoy more than the few seconds of an orgasm. In our case my wife wanted her best girlfriend, not a man and we formed a poly triad with her girlfriend that lasted 30 years. It has been wonderful. I never dream of my wife with another man. I have seen her that way and it never aroused me. Watching her with another woman and her watching me with another woman, was our thing up to 7 years ago when we relocated. We started chastity on the honor system too and after awhile my wife and I wanted to go longer between my orgasms so we bought a cage and I wore that for 4+ years. Start off slowly or you will develop pain. Let your skin get used to it a little at a time. It took me 3 months to go 24/7 wear and even than I needed a custom made metal device to be very comfortable in it. We have been just a couple again for the last 7 years but we are now in our mid sixties so sex is not a priority as it used to be and we have tasted all that sex can offer having gone through every fetish on Fetlife and more. We are now a monogamous vanilla couple for the first time in our 45 year marriage and I cannot honestly recommend it. It suites our circumstances but so does a hospital when you are sick.
Welcome to the Mansion, that is some journey to get here. I do hope you will continue posting and have fun on the site.
yes to clarify I meant the part where she learns to understand the benefits of denying you (that is great)...but...then takes it "too far" and totally forgets your pleasure. I know that is the goal of many in chastity and I have the same fetish...was mostly making a joke. I hope you are enjoying your predicament!
Interesting evolution for you both. What about the possibility of her cuckolding you? Sounds like she'd really enjoy it. How about you?