Hi, my name is...

Thanks for replying to me. I think, honestly, he was probably secretly craving it. I think he wants to have as few responsibilities as possible and I've realised over the years I'm somewhat of a control freak on certain things. I used to suffer quite badly with anxiety and for me, the FLR alleviates it a lot as I feel I'm very much in control of my surroundings and my slave. He was extremely nervous to begin with. I don't keep him totally in the dark about the finances - he has a very brilliant mathematical brain - but I make the final decisions on everything and he asks me permission before he attempts to spend money.
Currently, due to the change in our financial circumstances, we're currently staying with family. So when the family is at work and I'm not making him work on bringing in money, then yes - his day consists of foot worship and doing the chores I assign him. Apart from that, I've created a timetable that we both stick to - me becasue of the baby - him because he incurs penalties if he doesn't stick to it. I'm currently working towards a weekly meal plan too as I want him to start getting into shape and go back to the gym and stop wasting so much money on fizzy drinks. That will come into effect on Monday, although I've not finished the meal plan yet.

 

I think you're potentially right when you put it that way. I do tend to keep my slave locked up sometimes for a couple of months at a time. Sometimes, when he thinks I'm going to let him out, he might piss me off and then I'll deny letting him out as a punishment. I guess that's probably not so vanilla then.

I guess I've been doing this so long now that it's second nature.

 

Thanks for the positive responses from everyone, you've made me feel very welcome.

 

Yeah, I guess when you think about it, it's a very dramatic change in the relationship - even though it was so gradual for me. We've tried to implement rule lists etc but I find that real life gets in the way. My slave would probably prefer to have a much more slave/dog-like existence. The dream is one day for him to essentially live I suppose in like a cell where he can look up at me through bars, however, with a child I'm not really sure how to make that work without exposing my child to it. Also, living with family makes things hard.
I find personally, the best way for me in our current situation is to exploit what I know my slave hates and for him, it's the thought of public humiliation or for me to say something to him with the family in the house.
An example of this would be when we were on holiday in the summer, he upset me in public by back chatting, so I said very loudly (because I don't give a hoot what people think of me), "Is that house a slave is supposed to act, because quite frankly, I don't think so now grovel before I really lose my rag!" Things like that work extraordinarily well for us.
Sometimes, I feel like he forgets that in my opinion, owning a slave is one of the most effective ways to live an authentically feminist lifestyle and that I'm not ashamed really of how we choose to live our lives. For him, though, he likes to hide it as he feels he still has his "alpha male" persona to live up to. I'll indulge him around family and friends, but beyond that IDGAF lol.