hi! and thankyou for letting me join!!

howdy everyone! today I want your help to get into the chastity lifestyle. I started when i was 12 and well now I'm 20 totally

regretting the fact I was able to view porn when i was little. no one showed me to masturbate, but i learned from porn heh.


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tl;dr : I fucked up my body from masturbating so much. Now my brain is fried, in constant fatigue like an orgasm is always in my brain never leaving. A foggy headed feeling, with alot of memory loss / forgetfullness. I can move around, im not bed ridden but imagine feeling like you are at 50% energy in your body from being sick. You can still move around though it takes a hell of alot more effot and is awesome when you finally feel that "return to healthy" energy again. I bought the CB-3000 black color to make myself, force myself to stop and being my only keyholder sucks. So now I need help/support from you folks.

Yes, that is me with "chastity mansion" i wrote my stomach to show that I AM REAL!!! AND I AM TO STAYYY!!
Thank You for reading the tl;dr
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WARNING LONG LONG POST!!!!

when i turned 20 this past october in 2009, I ordered a CB-3000 the black version. I kept trying to learn to stay in it being the

only key holder I'd give up. over and over i'd keep failing. I need a community to put me in my place and no key holder ANYWHERE my age , lives where i live in medford, new york. And no girl wants to date a freak like me who wants to get into her pants.

If everytime you view a girl you want to get into her pants, I feel corrupted. I want to control myself and have the ejculation

control of a master sex man!! i wanted to even go into penis exercising which I did butttt i could never get hard when I turned

18 i signed up for a program and still am a life time member. When i told the penile excerise site how i coulldnt get hard, the

reaction , the flaming, the laughing. You be 20 and take your penis and i pretty much killed it at this point in my life lol.

my reason to be in chastity :

addicted to masturbating

As a result from masturbating soooo much. I now have:

dark circles under my eyes which I hate! I feel like a criminal whose finally been caught. i have no medical conditions and my eyes are actaully bloodshot too. :/

i cant get an erection. if I want to orgasm I have to literally yank and sqeeze my penis until i force ejculations. im literally semi-soft when i cum.

constant fatigue which makes me feel "foggy" headed. i feel like i had an orgasm that never went away and I cant think straight.

memory loss- like when i pour a bowl of cereal and if i dont really really concentrate. I will put the cereal in the refrigerator and the milk the cabinet. when I pay the pizza delievery man, acciendtally i have the money in my hand then put it down go and ll.....when the door bell rings I couldnt find it so the pizza compnay stopped to deliever after it happened. the first time i found the money in the freezer. the second i found the money in my medicine cabinet in the bathroom.
I'll have somethig in my hand one moment go do something then forget what I just put down. :/

jealous of guys I've seen on the internet from many many many websites who's cum is creamy, thick and shoots so much.

my sperm right now is very little it usually dribbles out of me, its clear and watery. basically my body wants to heal itself and i keep fucking it up.

I want to be with a girl and learn that you dont need a cock to make them orgasm. i orgasm within 1 minute flat and would rather not be greedy cumming so fast. besides its known fact that 70% of girls dont have orgasm from a penis anyways, thats why so many fake them.

****end of reasons****

So I wear a CB-3000 the black color because i want to feel like i dont deserve to look at my penis/cock. When you fuck up your body as much as I have (btw i dont drink and dont smoke). I just wanted it all to end. And i know its possible to make the CB-3000 feel natural and apart of your body.

I really hate how my penis pokes out of the vent holes, and it swells out so I wonder is swollen skin poking out of the holes for long-term harmful? My scrotum does get hurt from the ring that wraps around, though over time if i put up with the pain. Will it become tougher like a blister that heals into a callus?


Thank you for reading the long post too! I did make an xtube profile, under the same name "tomfucker" so i put up my first photos , though i dont know if they uploaded yet. and 1 stupid video. its my first time even taking photos of myself and getting into this whole wide internet world

 

Thank you very much everyone for the warm welcomes all around! I honestly felt that I would anger or break the rules here from my introduction. Since well I used some harsh language and my own health issues. This isn't a health website. A response to each poster is in order!!

@ Jaimelynn - Your story is INCREDIBLE! You must love your sisters dearly for the dress-up games.
I have no brothers/sisters, and my family never told me about masturbation. My friends no one I found
was into it either. A really tight lock on sex.

The comfort advice and vent hole modification is really realllly goood. I bookmarked this page when I want
to alter the CB-3000. This was alot of money for me buy for my birthday present awhile ago.


I got so nervous I chose I think second-day air deliervery, don't remember if there was a next day air
from AJ Miller's website.
A fear of Mom picking up and opening up the package. Thank god I was home when it arrived and
my parents were out for the day. I just want to make my body adjust to it. I got frustrated enough to
break down and ask for help. I felt like I was alone.

I'll alter it , I'm sure I will in the near future. Thank you for the detailed post and the love too.


@ Mistress Watchful - OMG! THE QUEEN IS HERE!!! ALL HAIL MISTRESS WATCHFUL! :anim_37:

PS: I saw on your amazon "Barcraft stainless steel multi measure jigger cup"
I could make an xtube vid dedicated to you! The cup in my mind is for
taking a man's cum and making him drink it? I could do it after I spend a week
building up my reserve. Though I have to warn you my face is HORRIBLE
I have really bad acne, and I need to work out soon, I am not pyshically active.
God, muscles would be nice. An even muscle tone throughout the body. Body is
ugly ;_;

@Mikecb- Thank you for responding to me too Mkecb!!! I have to tell you my medical history, well its not really long.

1) Born into the world in 1989- I was born with an undescended right testicle. When I was 2 months old
I went under surgery. It was successful, besides that no medical conditions.

2) Young child - umm 5~9 years old ?A lot of sore throats, strep throat rarely as a young child. It got
to the point where I was 1 more sore throat away from my
tonsils being removed. Stopped having them, till this day haven't
had a single sore throat. Got over my phase.

3) Glasses- I was old, probably around 8 when I got them. I remember crying so much because I'd think
glasses would turn me into a freak.

4) Age 12- Masturbation.

5) Age 13- The stitches from my testicle surgery as a baby. It lasted for about 2 or 3 weeks. It was this
searing pain I had in my right testicle, not in my left. I was so nervous to tell my parents I never
did. The feeling of stitches ripping apart to keep my testicle down in my scrotum not up my stomach
was way worse than a CB-3000. How did I know the stitches were tearing?
Answer: I woke up in the middle of the night with my right testicle
"stuck" up past my scrotum. So I pushed it down, gently
with my hand to put it back inside of its place. Eventually
the pain went away. And to this day I can push my
testicle up, not that far but make it look like I have 1 ball.
I never did tell my parents till I was much older, never
went to the doctor about it.

6) Age 14, 15, nothing. I'd learned to masturbate and kept at it. I didn't have friends, wasn't in school activities
so I remember since 12 to just masturbate. Go to sleep, wake up do my
homework,study. Since 12 I would masturbate for fun and keep myself always happy.

7) Age 16,17 - This was when I could feel that foggy brain symptom, and physical fatigue too. Of course I
masturbated so much I remember just a drop coming out of me. That's how much I was doing it.
No friends either, just all alone.

8) Age 17- I began to feel bumps on my groin, the crease where the groin meets the thigh area. At the crease
was where it was and of course I kept masturbating even though it scared me the bumps where
there. It's not painful but I told my parents because I was afraid I'd damage my cock and balls.
A self-chastity induced from masturbation was my actual thought.

The doctor did examine me, I dropped my pants and he felt inside the crease where the bumps
where. Turns out it was my lymp nodes on each side so bi-lateral lymp node bumps. I had to get
an ultrasound done on both of my testicles and my lymph nodes, inside the crease of the thigh area.
I remember how nervous I was because it was the first time I'd drop my pants in front of these
two young doctors. I have no erection either because I was jerking off night and day and before
then too. Still I was nervous.

Afterwards I went to the chief doctor of infectious diseases. A female doctor too, she had me to
examine me. She felt the bumps. She looked all around my cock/balls, thighs, even stuck a finger
up my ass to make sure that was working too!( No erections from that and the finger up my ass
since 1 doesn't work on me, I like 2 fingers! Yea I was doing that at 14 already).

The doctor asked me if I shaved the area, and I told her yes. I wasn't having sex with any guy, or
girl. I always shaved because I loved the feeling and the sensitivity, such a turn on. Still is today.
The doctor asked if I had a pimple and if I squeezed it. I said yes.

Result: Doctor said from me squeezing a pimple from shaving. It caused my lymph nodes to get
bumps on them. The lymph nodes are a warning sign from the body about an infection.
So the bumps were there, the doctor put me on an antibiotic and they went away.
Later on they did return again and still there today.

9) Age 18- Braces. My parents could afford to get me them and I was told by dentist serveral times to look into
braces to fix my overbite.

10) Age 19- Staph Infection- My uncle has a wood burning stove, it is made out of metal and looks like
a stove you wold cook in. Though it is a way to heat up your house.
He bought a TON of extra logs for the wood burning stove and there was so
many stacked in his drive way. I had to help take the wood from the piles in the
drive way to the back where he wanted to pile it, then store it by wrapping a
strong plastic tarp around each pile. We did this in June.


There was so much bending over to pick up the wood, putting it onto a cart and
repeat. It was only me and my Uncle and Aunt who helped too. The amount of
work to move it was 3 "quarts" of wood took all my energy out of me. I wanted
to spend the entire day until it was finally all moved and I didn't stop at all. The
bending and lifting, the bending and lifting.

I could feel this burning in my left thigh, near my groin. Since I was never physically
active I felt as if I had a muscle pull. I never had a muscle pull in my entire life.
The pain increased more in my left thigh, I feel it traveling deeper, and up more
to my body. Eventually it went right at the crease where my thigh meets the groin.
It was like something was cutting me open from the inside out. The pain did go
to my abdomen. And the pain stayed right in that spot. It became a little hard
bump I could feel but it was painful.

It took another 3 weeks until the pain went away, and I felt that hard bump in it's
place. Now that bump made a line in the crease of my skin, how the pubic area has
the crease of skin that goes right underneath your stomach. Right there the line
appeared. It kept moving and moving, and it got bigger.

It was now a day or two before Christmas. I didn't want to help out my Dad put up
the Christmas tree because I was being an ass to him. I just felt lazy and didn't
want to do anything to help him. He kept bugging me more and more and more.

This christmas tree was plastic and connected from other pieces. The tree is on a
metal base then a longer metal pole which slides down into the pole. From there
you connect the plastic tree branches to it. From moving around the tree branches
it rubbed against my stomach, near that crease. It cause that line I had there to
burst!

I couldn't keep this a secret from my parents any longer and told my Dad. He
drove me to the hospital where they had to emergency surgery on me. I had
a serious staph infection that was growing more and more inside of me. To get rid
of it. The doctors had to put me under anesthesia , cut down deep to squeeze out
all of that icky staph. The doctor found out that it was a stitch from my surgery
as a baby , the stitch never dissolved into my body. As of this writing there is no
explanation for why stitches wont dissolve in the body. The stitch caused an
infection, caused the staph. The burning I felt was from other stitches I had inside
my body. It would have stayed in my thigh but my stitches broke from the wood
moving marathon.

11) Age 20 (today!)- I got my braces off after 2 years of treatment! I fully healed from the staph infection, I have
a scar down on my groin but I was ok.


The entire time I had gone to the regular doctors, for your eyes, teeth, skin,
got an ultrasound. Got blood tests and other tests. All showed up normal.
I'm not a doctor though I know that it was from masturbation I felt more and
more of the symptoms of over masturbation, also called sexual exhaustion. In
my medical records I'm a healthy man of age 20. Though I do eat well. I stay
away from sugary, junk food. Eat plenty of fruits, vegetables, don't drink soda.
Don't smoke, don't drink, don't do drugs. I'm not an athlete but I am missing
physical exercise. I NEVER was physically active. I've heard physical activity does
alot of healing in the body. It's the best free medicine there is, soon I want to do
it.

That's the end of my medical history. Thank you Mikecb for your advice and everything!!!


Thank you all everyone here at Chastity Mansion!!!