Help with unwanted hard done by feeling

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by Boneless beggar, Sep 21, 2021.

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  1. Boneless beggar
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    Boneless beggar Active member

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    My goddess has turned into a super goddess lately. She has discovered fetlife recently and has been hunting other little cocks to lock online. she is very attractive and I'm sure the you can imagine the interest she is receiving which is making her feel good, like she should.

    The last few weeks since she has discovered fetlife she has been horney more than usual and life is great, some of the stuff she has done lately, people would shout me down and tell me to put it in the fantasy section. She has also in the last 6 months has become more strict and I know if she says do something or you will stay locked for extra time. She now means it and it's such a great feeling. Knowing she's in charge and means business.
    The house is tidied and decorated how she wants and she has final say on all my free time, life is great.

    I am still a work in progress. We have had the device in play full time for about 3 years. But the longest I have managed without release is 2-3 weeks. I know some of you will find this pathetic but I guess. I'm someone who likes them to be controlled,not taken away.
    In the early days I confused her. She is a genuinely a kind person and it would hurt her to think of me genuinely unhappy. In the early days I didn't know my self if I wanted to cum or be denied I guess I just knew I wanted her to decide.
    I used to top from the bottom which I have also improved on.
    I used to tidy the house because I wanted to be let out. Now I tidy because I like seeing her happy and relaxed.
    I love seeing her happy face when some one is complementary to her on fet life.
    When we argue (rarely)I feel sick that I upset her.
    I guess I'm try to say I'm much improved as a slave in our full time flr.
    I'm having my cake and eating at the moment. Most people would give there right nut for what I have with her and she is my best friend too.

    I'm a much improved player but have a real weakness that when I'm denied (as I rightly should be if she decides) I can go abit sulky. I don't know if life/ work pressure gets to me.
    I have become much better over the last few years and now most of the time I fucking love it. But every now and again I get sulky. I feel hard done by. I shouldn't. I don't want to go back to the way it was before, her not knowing if shes coming or going.
    I sit there telling myself this is what u want. But something which usually turns me on agitates me and keeps me from going to sleep and stops me performing my best for my goddess for the rest of that evening. Being quiet and slightly salty. I usually wake in the morning even more eager to please.
    I have suggested not dealing the denying blow until just before we go sleep but she likes to sit for abit and chat after her pleasure and sometimes I'm ruining that and I want her to be in control.
    I feel it rarely happens if I know I'm not being let out until the weekend and this is Thursday night, pleasure was only ever going to be hers but once again that kills the spontaneity and takes back control which is not good.
    I need to fix this in me, she is flawless.

    As I said it's happening less and less but when it does its a horrible feeling. I try and hide it from her but she knows me and cares about me to much to be fooled.
    I come onto the mansion to remind me how I should be which sometimes helps. Sometimes she will just have to say. "It's locked cus I want it to be" and that helps but I wish I could just push selfish thoughts out of my head so I can concentrate on her happiness.

    Has anyone else dealt with this?
    Did it get easier over time?
    Did u have any tips to help you through it?


    Sorry for the long winded message but it made me feel good sharing. Which I don't often do.

    Thanks guys
     
  2. Jessica Alexander
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    Jessica Alexander Trans woman not a mistress or Dom

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    Maybe you need to buy a Kitchen Safe keybox so she can put the keys in and if you are going to play. She can retrieve in the morning and it would take away that “little bit of hope” for getting unlocked. Once you have it in your head 100% that you aren’t going to get out for play, you are relived of the irrational thought of release and surrender yourself to focusing on her.
     
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  3. Jessica Alexander
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    Jessica Alexander Trans woman not a mistress or Dom

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    It's that sliver of hope that is crushing you. You need to find a way to remove it to be happy.
     
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  4. Boneless beggar
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    Boneless beggar Active member

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    Thanks guys. Like I say it gets less and less the further on with it we have gone. I just don't want spoil something that is going so great. So do you to think I need to be sealed up for longer durations but know when release date is?
    Like I was saying I didn't want to remove spontaneity but if perhaps its just for abit.
    Do people find there sex drive slows down abit the older they get?
     
  5. cumslave_2002
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    cumslave_2002 Ms. Shauna's Hubby

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    My sex drive has definitely slowed some as I’ve aged. 58 now. But being permanently locked and denied for months on end. I’m hornier and frustrated more then I’ve been my entire life. It’s a satisfying and frustrating experience.
     
  6. Jessica Alexander
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    Jessica Alexander Trans woman not a mistress or Dom

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    It might be better if you go a while without release and absolutely know that you arent getting a release. You can't be disappointed if you get what you expect.
     
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