Good attention and Bad attention

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Mr M, Sep 18, 2018.

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  1. Mr M
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    Mr M Find yourself, find peace; find others, find joy.

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    Part of my fascination with chastity has been the development of my own self awareness. It has exposed the relationship between my sexuality, my psychology and my feelings. One of my recent observations is that I had a history of using sex to avoid emotions in intimate relationships. And as I have become more committed to the intamacy between me and my KH, the more chastity has prevented me from hiding from my feelings (or allowing me to break the rules).

    My psychology, the commentary on my feelings, was hogtied and went crazy to find a different way to avoid my emotions.

    Bottom line, I feel vulnerable and exposed in wanting and sometimes needing my wife and KH like I do.

    Well my psychology is pretty smart. It has figured that I can get attention instead of sex to fix that vulnerability (I agree it does not correlate). Good attention or bad does not matter.

    If there seems to be a reward potential, I serve. If I can’t get attention I break the rules just enough to get it ( not too much as there are still consequences).

    What has been tough is trying to find a new way to productively express and relieve my feelings without sex or bad behavior. My KH gets busy and can’t be there every time I have a feeling, I need other outlets.

    Does anyone else identify with this and have you worked out what to do in your situation?
     
    Breathe and Rectrix like this.
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