As I noted last night I was in pampering and cuddling mode w/ the wife. This AM a little bit of Tiger showed up. When I wen't to work out..."you are just working out NOW?"..."you need to be done by 7 to help with the kids"...Me: I let it slide off like water off of a duck..."I'll hurry, 10 minutes OK?" ..."ok" The real fun was when she stepped in a mess in the kitchen. Her: "WHAT is this I just stepped in?" I made some fun of it...oh no we may have to amputate"...her:"get me a towel"...I do, then she says: "after the kids are done please clean this all up"...now this is where in the past I may have blown up a little that she assumed that was my job. so I funly and coyly said "what makes you think that's my mess?"...her:"well the garbage fell over didn't it?"...again I could argue a variety of ways but instead I simply took a step toward her, looked her up and down, and dropped a big kiss on her. She smiled and said: "what color do you want my toes to be on vacation" Its hard to explain, but that was all hot. She got into Tiger Wife mode...I let her win, she rewarded me back. Fun stuff. It has not been easy in the past for us to find this kind of balance. Maybe making everything fun (and not about sex and submission) when she wants to lead is a better path. Off to live out day 5 self locked...
6 days honor system behind me. I let her know yesterday that I was starting to experience some feelings and emotions due to staying "faithful", that there are no expectations on her, to give me feedback if I go overboard, I compared my 3-4 day cycle to her 28 day cycle and she said: "OK so you are cramping"...we laughed. Good news is some of the cat is out of the bag and I can talk. I sent her an email explaining what I intend to do better than last time so that she is not scared off and doesn't feel pressure. I made it clear that I WANT to experience this, and don't feel pressure to hop on your back every 3 days. Let me dote on you a little, etc. She held me later and said "you are a good man" ...seems like progress...
What you both benefit from is the "What can I do for my partner?" attitude with everything and anything. When you both do nothing but give... you're both also doing nothing but receive. Win-Win.