Full circle?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Finn-egan, Oct 11, 2018.

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  1. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Member

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    I'm not sure how many other guys here are in the same boat chastity wise. The basics of my chastity agreement with my wife and my keyholder is that the boy parts are not for sexual use anymore. As the months have been piling up, I've noticed that I'll see something on Tumblr and such, and 1) realize that I don't get to do that anymore. 2) I realize that it's been months or years since I've done many of the things. 3) I'm looking at stuff in much the same way I did when I was young, and viewing it as a fantasy that will never happen.

    The difference is that in reality, I've actually done most of the stuff I'm viewing, but the reality of being chaste means that I won't get to do them from now on. The emotional feeling though, is very much like back in the day, looking at porn and thinking how amazing and crazy it would be to ever get to do some of this. Chastity has been a sort of mental re-set to an earlier way of seeing. At some point, I swear my virginity will return, and if somehow I ever do get to "get lucky", it will be double deja-vu! Anyone else experience anything along these lines?
     
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  2. tegelad
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    tegelad Class and sophistication in all things

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    Congratulations. I do believe you could say you are a born again virgin.
     
  3. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Member

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    Not quite yet, but maybe when I get to a full year!
     
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  4. harddenial
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    harddenial Member

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    Yup all this is certainly true for me too. One major mental reset for me is that
    if I'm attracted to a female (photo or real-life), any sexual thoughts I have are dominated by the thought of what it would be like using my tongue to give her pleasure.
     
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  5. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Active member

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    I very much understand this! For example, we have no cuckold fantasies, but I often look at cuckold-themed Tumblrs and experience this incredible wistfulness, this feeling of loss, and this feeling of sympatico with the cuckold. I wistful for those days of fucking, those days of alpha manliness, those days of shooting semen in my wife's pussy. I know I've lost that, that I don't have free erections anymore, that I don't duck anymore, I still remember what that was like, I wonder, doubtfully, whether that will ever happen again. I'm so jealous of the bulls, of their firm hard erections, of the way they get to have sex with the wife. But like the cuckold I know that my penis is not for satisfying her and that I must help and seek out new ways to satisfy her (without another man of course) that I will lick her and worship her, but that I will still just throb in my cage, wondering what it would be like to be an alpha male.
     
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  6. Cincy
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    Cincy Active member

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    I no longer get to shoot semen in my wife's pussy, but once in a while I am allowed to dribble cum on my wife's pussy via a ruined orgasm, and the best part, she allows me to do my clean up duty.
     
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  7. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Member

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    I'm the same way. I realized at one point that both in real life and images, my hard wiring now is to give pleasure. With my wife and I, we have me wear a strap-on for sex. When I wear that, it's like a real part of me, and I do both feel part of it, and at the same time, cuckold to the dildo, if that makes sense. When I'm not wearing it, I don't have any inclination to hump, go figure. With my keyholder, I'm locked and I have no genitals. I function largely as her manservant, massage therapist, and bottom. Our relationship involves bdsm (and cbt) but isn't sexual as such.
     
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  8. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Member

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    I can relate!!!
     
  9. tegelad
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    tegelad Class and sophistication in all things

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    Does your wife enjoy penetration still? I.e. do you use toys etc? One doesn't need to have another human being to put you into that headspace.

     
  10. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Member

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    Yes, we use a strap-on with a leather harness that has room for my parts/CB. My wife hates cum, and likes to stop after her orgasm. As a result, I gave up having orgasms from piv sex many years ago. We do what we call "reverse 80's porn sex".....That's where we focus on her orgasm, she cums, and I'm left high and dry. Even using the strap-on, I really enjoy this, as the longer I've gone without ejaculation, the closer I get to orgasm, just from the stimulation of the dildo pressing on my CB and base of my genitals. We both get close at the same time, and when she's ready to orgasm, I know I'm out of luck....which feeds my denial fetish perfectly! :)
     
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  11. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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    The knowledge that you'll never need to cha up, try to impress, seduce ever again is liberating
     
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  12. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Active member

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    So true.
     
  13. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Active member

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    I also share this. When I see a photo of a beautiful vagina all I think about is licking her. When I see an attractive woman on the street my mind acknowledges that I'm a caged chaste male and I wonder when the last time she was properly orally worshipped was.
     
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  14. tegelad
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    tegelad Class and sophistication in all things

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    I believe you are using a version of a kareeza, which is pretty awesome fwiw.

     
  15. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Member

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    That's it exactly. We based it on Tantric and Karezza! When I share her orgasm perfectly, I get actual relief, like I've also climaxed. It actually works with the strap on as well as real sex, which was amazing to discover, since conventional sex is now off the table.
     
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  16. tegelad
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    tegelad Class and sophistication in all things

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    A fun fantasy (I am not as lucky as you with the quality/type of sexuality in my relationship) that I have had is to have the primary orgasm from myself be through the prostate and for my partner and I to orgasm together with a strapless strap-on.

    So penetration happens, just not in the traditional way, with the main advantage being there is no time of the month for a guy :)

     
  17. SubmissiveSlut1
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    I think all chaste men go through this. I feel bourne again but as a slave to her pleasures. When i see other woman i only see them for my Mistress. I find it as a betrayel to my Goddess to fantasies about other woman when im serving her pleasures not mine. So i look for woman to point out how much my Mistress would enjoy a beautiful woman. Mistress would never unlock me again if i was to do this! My contract i have to be 100% honest. Mistress only wants me to think about huge cocks for me to pleasure for her fantasy of me sucking and fucking them. She is my owner so i only do as she wishes.
     
  18. jasonpatalonis
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    jasonpatalonis Active member

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    Finn-egan,

    Thank you for a wonderful post. You make such a simple point, yet I've never seen it made before. I, too, feel the ache. Not so much an ache in my balls as it is an ache that I am not likely to ever have intercourse again--not with my wife, and especially not with another woman. I shall never feel a "blowjob". I won't ever cum inside of a woman.

    And the kicker? My wife no longer even allows me to see her naked, despite her being very attractive for her age. She actually calls me a "Virgin Boy" and postulates that it's not appropriate for the Virgin Boy to see an adult woman in the nude.
     
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  19. Cincy
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    Cincy Active member

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  20. Cincy
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    Cincy Active member

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    "I shall never feel a "blowjob". I won't ever cum inside of a woman". That statement also rings so true for me.
     
  21. tomf_22033
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    tomf_22033 Active member

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    Sorry I had to laugh. I’d rather give a blow job than receive them. And I’d rather do oral on a woman over PIV. It took my ex awhile to get this. It was also a bit funny as she was an amazing lover in all ways but oral. And it took awhile to convince her that I really didn’t like getting blow jobs.The fact that she wasn’t good at giving them really was a challenge at first. But once she found her place as the sexual dominant it became a non issue as she didn’t offer them anymore.
     
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  22. Cincy
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    Cincy Active member

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    I don't think my wife ever enjoyed giving blow jobs, but she would do what she considered her wifely duty. I think she was very happy when I told he that I thought that a dominant wife should not give blow jobs to her submissive husband.
     
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  23. Joey love
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    Joey love Active member

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    When my wife said “I do” that meant not anymore:) that’s ok though. I agree with Tomf about much rather giving oral than anything else actually. It took her awhile to realize that I didn’t need anything afterwards and was completely satisfied with satisfying her
     
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