Found my boyfriends device by accident

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by rose_93, May 30, 2020.

  1. rose_93
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    rose_93 New member

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    Hi! I’m female and I’m brand new here! I’m not sure if this is the place to ask this but I’m in a bit of a pickle. I recently moved in with my boyfriend of 3 years and whilst unpacking the boxes I found a chastity cage, I didn’t know how to react so I decided to put it back where it belongs. I still haven’t brought it up. So keyholders, should I confront him and ask about it? Have you had a similar experience yourself? Help!
     
  2. tomf_22033
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    tomf_22033 Active member

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    If you discovered it innocently then why not mention it to him. If you were snooping then you have more serious issues.

    So hoping it’s the former. And hope you can have a mature conversation. Why not use it as a chance to talk about your fantasies and desires? Use it to establish trust and open communication. Don’t be judgmental and you may be surprised that he may be very open to your “deep dark secrets”.
     
  3. jim48
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    jim48 Active member

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    You said you put it back where it belongs, I hope that wasn't in the box. That is not where it belongs. Definitely talk to your boyfriend. He will be glad to have it out in the open.
     
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  4. undercoversissy
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    undercoversissy New member

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    I'm glad you're being open minded enough to do some research and come on here to ask. That must mean you're interested in what could happen and not completely put off by the idea.

    Best thing to do is discuss fantasies and kinks etc and see what comes up. If you want him to wear it for you, you could even suggest getting one and see if he mentions that he already has one.

    It's should be an exciting journey, would love to hear an update as it goes on.
     
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  5. steelwaiting
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    steelwaiting Member

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    As a caged man I would say you should tell him you noticed it and ask him why he is not wearing it. Maybe he wanted you to find it. If you read enough comments here you will notice a trend of men wanting their partners to take control and demand the wearing of the chastity cage.
    It's a slow journey but worth it.
     
  6. JellyBaby
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    JellyBaby New member

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    It’s probably just semantics but you ask if you should ‘confront him’. I’m not sure a confrontation is what you meant, but I would certainly avoid turning any talks you have into such a thing.

    As undercoversissy says, the fact that you have come on here to ask about it suggests it’s not a complete deal breaker for you. Your boyfriend may feel guilt, embarrassment or both upon learning you have discovered out his secret, so go gently.

    Of course it could just be an innocent prop from a recently attended stag do where the stag was cuffed to a lamp post naked apart said device!
     
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  7. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    I think it depends on you. Are you interested in chastity or is it a complete turnoff? Either way, as others have suggested, you need to talk to him about it. In my fantasy world I would want my partner to hold it out in their hand and ask "what is this?", "how do you put it on", "why do you have it?" "show me", "give me the keys"
     
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  8. Lisa43
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    You have been with your boy friend for three years , so I assume you know how he reacts if you take control of his piece? How do you feel about chastity and having control of him, does this turn you on or off? Take some time to think about this, try experimenting with him; does he like bondage, being controlled? Are both of you open to new ideas? Get him to talk about his true feelings, if both of you think chastity would be fun, give it a try. There are many books on the subject, you may want to see if it appeals to you if so you will have lot of power and responsibility. Lots of men want a strong woman to control them.
    I hope this helps, it is just my thoughts on the subject.
    Take care, Lisa
     
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  9. Eve
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    Welcome
     
  10. Eve
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    Do what needs to be done, lock him up and have some fun
     
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  11. MissyB
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    MissyB Active member

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    Welcome to our community. Please look around and see what all chastity play has to offer. I think the big key for you, and for anyone in this, is to honestly communicate with your bf, Find the best approach for you, to talk about it, or sex play in general. Find out his interests and tell him yours. Sex is not something that always comes naturally, so sharing feelings can make it so much better. I hope it goes well, good luck, and enjoy.
     
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  12. madams-sissysub
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    madams-sissysub Junior Member

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    Hi there and welcome to the mansion! Talk to him about it!
     
  13. Mrloched
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    Mrloched Active member

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    What an amazing opportunity to totally blow his mind. Assuming your comfortable with it. Don't waste this chance.
     
  14. Her_boy_joseph
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    Yes to all of of what undercoversissy said
     
  15. krystalasbaby
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    krystalasbaby krystalasbaby

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    Welcome to the mansion. You said that you innocently came across it while unpacking. Simple thing to do in an non threatening voice, without holding it. Is to ask him nicely why he has one and once he answers that question, ask him if he would wear it for you, then you hold the keys.
    It only comes out when you need to use it.
     
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  16. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    Is that the cage or its contents? Contents I hope
     
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  17. MistressS
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    Verified Female

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    Hello welcome to CM. I'd say yes ask him about, provided you want to be his KH. As they say be careful what you aske for.

    MistressS
     
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  18. krystalasbaby
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    krystalasbaby krystalasbaby

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    Just the contents
     
  19. LockedJani
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    LockedJani New member

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    I hide it a place I knew she would find it but didn't know when. Then I didn't need to be so nervous about telling it. It took over a year but it went good
     
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  20. mch2323
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    mch2323 Member

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  21. mch2323
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    mch2323 Member

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    Men use chastity for different reasons. Talk to him and find out what he likes about it and what part if any he wants you to play. Then you need to decide what if any part you want to play or let him just explore my himself .
     
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  22. WhiteKnight
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    Hi, first of all welcome to the Mansion. It's a very friendly and supportive space and you get lots of good advice and tips if you're interested. I think first question is how do you feel about it ? Intrigued ? Excited ? Disgusted ? You don't say whether you have any experience with BDSM: either with your BF or in previous relationships, I'm assuming no previous chastity play, and if so how you felt about those. Do you see yourself as dominant ? Is it something you could see yourself growing into ? You're obviously broad-minded: you're still with him and not afraid to be posting here. How did you find us by the way ?
    I think we can also assume that it something which certainly does interest your BF, and probably has done for a long time: whether he's been using it for solo-play, without you knowing, or with a previous GF. Have you considered either of those.
    Since he left it where you found it, unpacking, he's either comfortable enough not to think or mind about you finding it. Or, has also already been mentioned perhaps that's what he wanted as a way of breaking-the-ice.
    If you're happy to give a whirl then by all means why not. You, especially, could have some wonderful sexual adventures ahead of you. You will have to consider taking control and maybe moving towards an FLR - in the bedroom - and possibly the rest of the house and be happy with that.
    Most of all do take it seriously . . . because it's almost certainly very important to him . . . but both have fun at the same time !
     
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  23. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Member

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    I'd bring it up with him if you like that idea of it. He wouldn't have one if he didn't like the idea of it.
     
  24. slimswitch
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    slimswitch Member

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    I absolutely love that when you found this, your reaction was to join and post to this forum :) I'm trying to think how I'd raise it in a non-threatening way; maybe something like

    "hey, so when we were moving, I noticed something sexy among your stuff and I'd love to know if there's a story behind it - you have a chastity cage?"​

    By framing it as "sexy" immediately you put them at ease and open up a conversation about how it might get used, and if it's just the result of some sort of jape they can tell the story and it doesn't seem like a heavy conversation. If the conversation goes well then "I'd love to know what it looks like on you" is a very reasonable follow-up. Or if it's not a direction you want to go but you still want them to feel comfortable, you can say "I don't think it's my thing but I'm always happy to know about things that make you happy".

    oh and PLEASE DO ask us all about our experience, feelings etc about these things if you want to know more! This forum is full of people who are happy to share these things and delighted to help. Good luck!
     
  25. dt4y
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    dt4y Member

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    If i would be you boyfriend it would be superhot if you just put it on while i'm sleeping. fall asleep in freedom, wake up locked.
     
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