First time in Chastity, The beginning of my journey

Question: Is male chastity a submissive act? Not necessarily. Does it take a real man to realise who should come first in a relationship? Albeit with a little help from a locked device. Certainly, this has been my choice, one taken lightly perhaps, but I am not a total submissive. Perhaps just a romantic without the right line, the right encouraging word at the right time. Unable to stop myself from making poor choices. Perhaps I am learning to think before I speak.

Sorry if I ramble a bit sometimes. My thoughts can be all over the place at times.

Had a good day, with people over for food. Attended to the ladies well enough I think. I just should think of all of you as an extension of her. The mothers of the world. We owe you our lives, going back to the dawn of time. You nurture and help us grow, and we protect. Not that I'm against role reversal, just saying/rambling in general.

 

Realising that it will take time for L to get fully on board. I must show patience. I have been dreaming of this for a long time and she needs time to catch up.

I was awoken to a lovely edging session this morning in chastity followed by PIV out of my cage. Told her that just because she had released me didn't mean that she had to allow me to cum. I was allowed. Thank you Mistress L.

Made love twice this week, but other than a daily clean and a few self releases in the early hours just to get some sleep, I have been locked up. I am only slightly tempted to play with myself but always lock it up before it gets edgy.

Got my first racy text, referring to my predicament. That was fantastic. We continue to grow closer which is the best thing of all. She knows that this is working for us as a couple so that's really positive. I love saving myself for L. It has now been two weeks without cumming on my own, and I don't miss masturbating at all.

 

It's like red wine. I would rather enjoy a £20 bottle once in a while, than drink a £5 bottle every day. There's nothing like that heady feeling that you get when that lovely Burgundy slides down so smooth with a nice bit of cheese and a hunk of bread. Food, Wine, Sex and Weed... Does life get an better than this?

 

I texted her:

Handing you the key after locking myself back up in the small cage not knowing when I would be let out was psychologically powerful. I am yours, always.

Telling me that you felt I "had your back" (with relation to the kids) was also a great affirmation of how the last two weeks have been going.

I love you.

Making love to you feels different than before. Does it feel different to you? Do you think about how I have saved myself for you when we make love, and does it make you feel good?

Feels good becoming the man of her dreams.

 

Texted when I got to work:

J. I forgot my spare key. Now I'm really stuck.

J. I'm not kidding...I really did leave my key at home...

L. Oh no ru going to be ok? Xx

J. It is making me think about you more...So I will be ok even if a lot more frustrated by the end of the day. But then it's the frustration that feels soooooo good.

J. You are a Godess to me

J. One good thing....the day does seem to be going quite quickly

J. Oh shit. I was reading the wrong clock
(UK daylight saving and the security cameras don't reset themselves)

L. Lol I am not surprised, I thought my day was going rather slow

After telling L that I had the rest of the week off, I texted...

J. My week just got shorter though...

J. Shorter than my caged manhood.

L. I got a R.O.F.L. emoji in response.

I think about L so much now. When, this evening, I said "is there anything I can do for you honey?" I got the smile I love so much and an quick response "Oh, I'm sure I can think of something"

She went to bed early. I massaged her back while she pressed into my cage with her behind. Very edgy. I asked, but said she didn't have to answer, if she knew when I would be allowed to touch it. Though probably because she was nearly asleep, she remained silent on the matter. Good girl. Keep me guessing.

I played with her hair and softly sang "Always on my Mind" Presley version, the lyrics of the first verse I had texted her half an hour before, for her to find on her phone in the morning. She sent me downstairs and told me not to break any rules. I love this woman.

Trying to think about how to broach the subject of edging and ruined orgasm. Needs a delicate touch, pun not intended but enjoyable nonetheless.

I did explain that I discovered that not cumming was very satisfying when I was trying not to wake her when spooning. (As my penis relaxes I find my.mind and body relaxing too) I said that saving myself was like having one Ferrero Roche at the weekend rather than a Mars Bar every day. I told her that when I last climaxed inside her, and it took so little effort, and just the right amount of time hope, I could feel everything so much more, it was really intense. She agreed it was good.

The time after, Sunday morning, when we made love, she had her fill long before I did. It was less than 48 hrs after the last PIV. It took her a while to tell.me.she'd had enough, I think she is still holding on to some guilt if I don't cum. I must pay more attention to when she is done and stop it myself. Then reassure her that I don't have to cum, that it would be better for her if she locked me back up and waited a bit longer. It will bring us even closer I'm sure.

I think, depending on how long L wants to keep me locked up, that I would want to cum eventually, but how long should I wait? She would not want to force the issue. If I told her, I really couldn't wait any longer I expect she would let me, and probably help. But that defeats the point. How long should I be trying for now? I have gone 5 days without ejaculation before. Sex is off the cards for at least another week anyway because of timing. Part of me thinks to wait until she can enjoy it again, which could mean 7 to 14 days maybe. It seems like a long time to me at the moment.

 

L forgot her phone this morning, and having the week off, I met her for lunch. The key has been on her dressing table in a drawer for the last three weeks. It is attached to a nappy pin. So in Sainsburys I hooked it on her bag when she was getting her sandwich. Not usually that observant, she noticed it as soon as we got back in the car. She moved it onto a hook on the inside. There it remains. I texted in the way back that I had put on the small cage after my bath.

Rubbed L's back, and after she asked how my small cage was and held my locked up junk so nicely I was writhing for about 15 minutes. I said my small cage felt very tight now and I begged for release a few times.She ignored my requests (I kinda wanted that anyway)Then she said that's enough and went to sleep. I thanked her for an amazing time, and asked if I would be allowed out tomorrow. "Maybe"

 

I asked L if I could change for a larger ring this morning. I was instructed to fetch the key and she asked if I wanted her to take it off. Yes please Mistress! She unlocked me and slowly pulled off the cage. She doesn't like the bit where I have to poke my cock inside itself to remove the ring, so I did that myself. I gave it a clean and put it back on. She put the tiny concealed lock through the device and locked me back up. "Kiss it for me" She asks if it's clean and I say "Yes", then she kisses it and leaves, taking the key with her. I ask if she could do more of that later. "Maybe"...Oh baby you slay me...

If I get to come later, I'm going to suggest I try not to again until after her cycle ends. That should be just over a week, which will be a good goal to reach, and an incredible feeling when we do finally get to make love again. Can't wait...well I think I can...You know what I mean.

 

Cycle just started. L is tired. We were talking while she was driving home. A first. And when she reached the shop I asked her to say something nice to me. "I don't think you are coming out tonight" "Oh baby". I was straining right away. Thank you my love. Thank you for teaching me patience.Thank you for making me the luckiest man alive.

How Sweet it is to be Loved by You

 

Had a bit of a reset this morning. L has been stressed so I wanted to take off the pressure for her to perform. To be honest I'm disappointed with myself for giving in to my animal urges. Even though she wouldn't let on I know she is disappointed in herself too. She knows I'm really trying hard to support and please her in every way. I apologised and said I would try harder. Sent lots of texts to cheer her up at work. I hope I can deserve your love.

 

I have to remind myself that this was my choice to start with. Be patient. No down time. Keep the focus on her. Keep communicating. I get a twinge of nervous excitement as I write, but maybe putting it down will help my commitment, I will try to hold out until L is ready for PIV. Edging only or ruined if it goes too far. Not that these are terms used with Vanilla wife. I don't think she realises how much I want it or how tough what might be 10 days for me. I will need some encouragement to get through, and subtly is key. I need to learn to hide any frustration I feel when it is the wrong time, so as not to add guilt to any stress L is feeling from other parts of normal life. The chastity should work like engine oil, unseen in the background keeping things running smoothly.

 

Texted L my plan and asked for help getting through...

It was this. My goal is now to try and last until you are ready for me. Which I know is going to be at least a week. The thought of it both excites and scares me a little. So, if I'm not being to presumptuous, I am going to need your help and encouragement.
It would be nice (and you have been doing an amazing job with this anyway) if it was allowed out once or twice and brought close to the edge, but (and this is important to me) only if it is what you want to do and I have earned it. I don't want you to feel obligated. Firmly telling me No can sometimes be as much a turn on as a kiss or a fondle.
Letting me out or having sex with you should not give me automatic right to cum. However much I want to in the moment, I will thank you for making me wait until you really want it. You have been so supportive and I feel so lucky to have you. Forever. Xxxxx

Been see the phrase "Top from the Bottom", and had to look it up. Having understood, I wanted to make sure that L knows I am handing her the reins, insert Ponyboy joke here...So sent this text.

If you feel that I'm trying to control the situation too much then I apologise. In some sense I know I am, but it is more in the spirit of trying to hand over some of the control I feel I have tried to have over the years. Making you feel guilty for not being in the mood when I am is one of my regrets and I am trying to redress the balance. Because I love you and you never deserved to feel that way. Xxx unconditionally yours.

We were in the car and I asked if she had read my texts. "Yeah, something about teasing you" she laughed. I asked her to read it properly, which she then started to do out loud. "Read it to yourself" I said "somethings I text you because I am too embarrassed to say it aloud"

I would like to believe, and I think the evidence backs it up, that things are going very well in the Jahrubbings household.

Yes I have access but I'm going to honour myself and if I feel weakness be open about it and get that access removed.

By saying, and writing my intentions I am honour bound to see it through.

 

L is telling or asking me if I am locked up. I was released, with a bit of gentle persuasion, then edged and denied this morning. Very happy with how I feel charged and focused on her. I asked for and got a countdown from 10 to lock up. It was amazing. Happily locked back up with a cat on my lap

 

L brought me to climax with a helping hand earlier in the week. Bit of a lull midweek, and I have needed to rein back a bit to allow for acclimatisation. I might have been overdoing the sexts.Had a good chat at lunchtime today and we are moving in the right direction I think. I reassured her that I wanted this to be about her. To beat my porn addiction and improved focus. I said that porn was not really turning me on anymore, that only thinking of her did. She liked that. ( Anyone else experience this?) I told her my fantasy was to make her come first and then not be let out until she is ready for sex. We tslked about perhaps reading some stuff together to help us move forward in a productive way. One step at a time.
Got a text later on that was positive for tonight. No pressure. I hope she doesn't release me for a couple more days to build up a bit more tension. 4 weeks in and I just want to cum less. Quality not quantity like a good expensive bottle of Hospice de Nuit or a Cote de Beune

Cold day at work the other day. One of the fellas popped out. Moved to the 2nd largest ring. HTv4. Ossasional heat sensation but not too much. Better the longer I wear it. I think I prefer the small cage over the standard, and I'm better at sleeping in it.

All in all. I'm learning about myself more than ever. Good thing, right?

 

Making love this morning was amazing. It didn't last too long and both of us were very satisfied. I was happily locked back up. I told her quietly when we were out shopping it felt like movie sex. That made her smile.

 

I was released again for a lovely her on top fuck. I lasted longer than yesterday and felt just a good.

Was being a bit cheeky with my banter in the garden, and was poked into place with the pointy end of the broom. Asserting her dominance in a good humoured "Are you questioning me" way. Obviously I backed down gracefully in a nanosecond. Lol. I love that woman.

L doesn't like talking during sex. So rather than try to persuade her to say naughty things about my predicament to me, I ask her rhetorical questions or tell her how horny I am for her and there is nothing I can do about it etc... She has always liked when I talk dirty, at the right moment, so that seems the natural thing to do. In time, maybe as her confidence grows with the knowledge that she is respected, supported and loved, and what works for us to keep that feeling strong, then perhaps she may start to be more vocal. And hopefully more demanding. Careful what you wish for.

 

Not allowed tonight. L wasn't feeling it, so I will hope for tomorrow. In the morning it will be 5 days without FO. My longest I think. Bit frustrated as she started to edge for a minute then was too asleep after the massage. Damn my amazing hands. Wrestling with my caveman instinct and the need to prove to her that I'm more advanced. HA! That's why it's locked up dummy. Good things come to those who wait.

 

I was let out and L played with me for a few minutes. As I came close to cumming I asked her to stop, thinking to ruin it, but L carried on and a few seconds later it was all over. All over my palm. I was elated and mildly disappointed. Felt good going back chastity in for her. Had a great day at work thinking of her constantly. No subdrop really.

Today on the sofa L was playing with my hair. I was purring like a kitty. Felt so good.

 

Although I have touched myself inappropriately, in the last 5 1/2 weeks I have not come without my wife allowing it. I'm quite proud of both of us. Both really busy with work and kids and stuff. Life goes on.

The goal isn't to not orgasm again. I just want to be in tune with L, and help her to relax, clear her mind and discover herself a bit more. For me it is easy to enter that zone where every touch sends electricity through your body, but for her it's different and there are so many different factors before it feels right for her.

I just don't want to impose, when that time isn't right, or cause her any guilt because of a preconceived duty of care that any loving wife can feel due to upbringing and beliefs. I feel my own guilt for past times when she has let me and in the heat of it you finish knowing that in your heart she didn't really enjoy that.

But the old me didn't even really know there was another option to coming. Not Coming! What! Putting it away? Locking it up? Saving myself for her. Denying myself the pleasure of self gratification. My Small HT4 has been on basically 24/7 for nearly 6 weeks with my wife slowly coming to terms with the new dynamic. She loves how attentive and helpful I am and that's probably all she'd say right now. Lol.

 

Early this morning L was in the mood. Caged, I licked and touched her pussy until she was quietly orgasming then she told me to unlock. Being inside her, pushing gently, right in, was sensational. We came pretty close together, which was really fantastic, having to push a minute longer as I came and then she did. Washed up and locked back up. Now to clean the house.

 

Went shopping. Told L that I was pleased with my progress but I now wanted to try for 7 days with one or two releases where I can be close but not allowed to cum. I would like to be able to last a couple of weeks if she is not in the mood, so that she doesn't feel pressured anymore to satisfy me. I am easing in to it and keep talking to her about my feelings. It's bottoming from the top but the results are plain to see. We have not really had an argument since I have been caged. Not that we are in a FLR or looking to go all the way down that route, but she knows more clearly now that I've "got her back" when it comes to vanilla life, so disagreements are quickly resolved.

I will try to continue to rein it in and follow a pace that L is comfortable with. Remain faithful to the promise to myself. I do not want to go back to the old me, masturbating on my own when everyone has gone to bed, to increasingly extreme porn just to get a fix.

I blame picture categories. Back in the days before the internet, an average lad would have a small stack of magazines. Hustler, Razzle, Men Only...and would be happy with that. Then dial up came. 30 minutes to see a picture, if the page loaded! Then Broadband!!! Picture categories. Suddenly you have a new kink you hadn't even thought about before. Clickbait. Drawn in and hopelessly lost. Chastity was one of those kinks. Now it is not about the kink it is about romance, love, lifestyle, my soulmate and wanting to please her.

Happy Sunday everyone
Happy Wifes to you all
Happy Subs (in a loose sense though who knows what tomorrow will bring)

 

Texted:

J. Have you got your key?
L. Yes, I am glad you reminded me, it's in my back pocket. Best put it somewhere safe. Xxx
J. It would be so sexy if you sent me a picture of it. Xxx



L. Happy?
J. Very



J. Happy?
L. Extremely
J. Looking forward to rubbing your feet later xxx
L. I love you xxx
J. I belong to L
L. Were you supposed to text that last one to someone else. lol
L. Perhaps a colleague who keeps hitting on you
J. I keep telling them! Lol

That's as close to a dick pic I'm gonna post, either here or to L. Genuinely aroused to see the key to my manhood on my ladyship's desk at work.

6 days to go. I wonder what may be in store for me.

 

So, in bed last night. I massaged her feet with oils, then her back, front and legs. I asked if she would like me to massage her anywhere else, and she said she was fine, so I kissed her once on her vulva and put her pj bottoms on with a kiss just before her womanhood disappeared under cotton. Then I held her legs and pushed my caged cock in to her crotch. Hands under her lower back massaging either side of the spine. She asked me to pull down, which pushed me into her. We did this rhythmically for about 5 minutes. L. "Oh that feels good"
J. "Yeah it does" (but for different reasons perhaps)
L. "You're not coming out"
J. "I know baby. Thank you"

It felt fucking amazing. Just thinking about it on the drive to work this morning has given me a rage on.

 

L was awake early worried about a missing cat (home now) and she asked if I wanted to make love. No hesitation here. She was on top and a few minutes of gentle thrusts and it was over. Managed about an hour sleep after that. I'm sure I will get the chance to try for 7 days soon, though I imagine L will want me once more before her time of the month. Her choice, we shall see.

 

L was holding my cage this morning.

J. What time is it?
L. 4 minutes to my alarm
J. Will you play with me out of my cage
L. Best get the key quick then
Whoosh!
OMG. Three minutes later the alarm goes off. L gets up right away. I start pushing it back in the HTV4 small. When she comes out of the bathroom I just finish locking up. I toss the key on the end of the bed, and she grabs it right away. Then come round to the side of the bed and leans in. Cupping by cock-cage and kissing me on the forehead. "Good boy for putting it away" she whispers in my ear. Great start to the day.

Got sent another key picture. This one whilst she was walking around town at lunchtime

 

A few days ago, before we made love I sent L a text.
I haven't cheated (with myself) in 6 weeks, though the temptation in the shower is strong. I think you may need to carry out surprise inspections to make sure I am behaving.
I didn't get a reply, but I'm much more aware not to succumb to my carnal desires when washing and get it locked back up quick. Just in case.

When I bathed earlier this evening I left my foreskin pulled back to see how it felt. Kind of like it. Am constantly aware of it, whereas normally i feel very little when flaccid in my cage. Don't think I would be able to sleep like that. Not without practice. I guess if you are circumcised you have no option. Which do you prefer foreskin guys?