First steps

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by LockedinColumbus, Jan 22, 2022.

  1. LockedinColumbus
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    Hi Folks. I've had a chance to poke around a few threads and I love the diversity of practices you engage in, alone or with someone special to you. My wife and I are in our 50s. I developed an interest in chastity a few years ago when my spouse was working in a different city and living away from home for half the week. I bought a steel cage and would lock up for a few hours at a time, maybe a few times a year. We since moved to the city where she works. A few weeks ago, I told her of my desire to be locked up and for her to hold the key. She's agreed, and has locked me up a few times, for a few hours at a stretch. She's slightly ambivalent about it, but mostly positive.

    We are both still figuring out what chastity play looks like to us. Neither of us is interested in permanent chastity. She's not naturally assertive or dominant, so I'm always excited when she just tells me to "lock it and bring me the key." She likes to wear that key around her neck in a low-cut top, which she knows I love. However, she is afraid of hurting me and does not like to leave me locked up very long--a few hours at most. She won't let me sleep caged. I've gone 15 hours before, and told her she can lock me up to 48 hours if she likes. But it is up to her, and I'm not going to push.

    For those of you with more experience, I'm curious. What do you think the next steps are going to be in our exploration of chastity play?
     
  2. madams-sissysub
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    Hi there and welcome to the mansion!
     
  3. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    You are making a great start. Her showing interest is huge.

    Your story is so similar to our own and many others. As you continue, you may get to witness your shy wife grow in ways that will surprise you. That is where the “Be careful what you ask for” comes from.

    The most common advise is to take it slow, and let her lead. It can take years. Start by increasing your lockup duration, if that is what you want. Many women seem to like the desperation and desire build up over time. They also like having control over sex. You may find you are having more sex than ever once she is in control.

    One thing you may want to consider is what you want out of it. Are you exploring submission, FLR, or are you enjoying some kinky play. Knowing this will help you as you progress.

    Have fun!
     
  4. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    Hello and welcome. Just take it steady. Don't feel you have to go for long lock-ups from the word go. Just get used to it. Good luck
     
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  5. Drews
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    Drews Long term member

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    Do not push her or try for too much at once. Worrying about you locked is a concern most women have. You need to let her know that it does not hurt or bother you, be honest if it does. If it does not hurt try and do normal things, non sexual so she can gain confidence that you are fine and she does not need to remove it.
     
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  6. ozzy-one
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    ozzy-one Long term member

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    Welcome to our very diverse group, I’m happy you found us. It sounds like you are on a equal playing field with your wife learning what this thing called chastity can do for your relationship. As others have said, taking it slow with lots of communication is key to a long term success. Does she know you joined this group, let her take some time and read through some posts, she may surprise you with some new found ideas. No matter what, keep at it if it’s what you’re looking for
     
  7. sissy veronique
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    sissy veronique Long term member

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    Hello and welcome to Chastity Mansion.
     
  8. MissyB
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    MissyB Long term member

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    Welcome to our community. I hope you find it helpful and entertaining.
     
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  9. heshehimher
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    heshehimher Member

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    Welcome! I recently introduced my partner to my cage as well. She has also expressed concern over my physical well being. I can't give you advice from an established practice, but from our new-ness, I think things that work for us have been me telling my partner that being caged helps me feel connected to her as we are long distance.
     
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  10. Jail Bird
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    Jail Bird Long term member

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  11. The decorator
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    The decorator Long term member

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    Hi it was the same for me at first a few hours here n there but now it’s mostly every day ( and night) until I’m needed if you know what I mean lol
     
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