Dressing the part on an everyday basis...

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by Mistress Watchful, Dec 1, 2008.

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  1. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    I'm having huge problems kicking myself back into the Dominant role at the moment. I think a lot of this has something to do with the fact I no longer see myself as a Domme on a daily basis.

    When I was really relishing the role I would make the effort to wear my best underwear, skirts, boots, etc and felt sexy... at the moment I'm in this horrible student/mother rut where I appear to spend most of my time dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt and then fall into bed wearing a t-shirt. (Sorry if I'm trashing people's dreams here!)

    I have GOT to find some way to incorporate my Domme self back into my clothing.

    I can't tippy-tap around Uni in high heeled boots all day (its a vast campus and I can't keep up with my peers!) and I need to find that fine line between smart and overdressed.

    This question is primarily aimed at how the Dom/mes dress and how they feel, but I would also love to know how subs/sisses feel about what their Dom/me wears (I won't tell them... don't go all shy on me!)

    HEEEEELLLLLPPPPP!!!!!
     
  2. Miss D
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    Miss D Expert In Femming

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    Perhaps something as simple as your choice of jewelry or handbag... You can make quite a statement with either and pet will always know the significance even if no one else does. I would stick with comfortable otherwise... It just seems out of place to wear a bustier, leather skirt and high heeled boots to campus (but wouldn't that make you the talk around campus and instigate some intense fantasies?)

    About sleeping in a t-shirt - does pet wear the satin nightgown? :bigsmile:

    Hopefully, someone else can be more inventive than I am.
     
  3. Mistress Kate
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    Mistress Kate Senior Member

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    I feel kind of uneasy offering you advice, Mistress Watchful. I'm only 4 months into this and I have gained so much from your posts. However, for what it is worth, in my case, I rarely go for Domme gear all day - occasionally at weekends - but I always wear something all day that reminds me of what I want to be (yes it is me that wants to be there now & not just him that wants me to be there !). That reminder is entirely for me - although I know he is very well aware of it ! I have a really comfortable leather bra that is not at all visible providing I don't wear a white top - and even then, if it is a thick enough top, it just looks like any black bra. I don't wear the matching knickers because they are not so comfortable to wear all day ! The strange thing - and I can't really explain why - is that, when I am tired in evenings, if I don't have it on I tend to feel disinclined to put more gear on and go for a tease session (unless he instigates something that gets me turned on) but, when I have it on, it seems to serve as a reminder to sort of spur me on. I wonder if it's the smell of it - because it's pretty new and I get a regular whiff of leather. Who knows - but it seems to do the job !

    It sounds like your home & student life gives you more distractions but you've got youth on your side. I wish I'd come across this many years ago !
     
  4. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    Thank you Mistress Kate.

    There is such a fine line... I want to be semi-sexy, and if I'm honest, that's how I dress when I'm horny... I'm just in this bloody awful loop at the moment!

    Today I have boots, nice jeans, clingy black top with a dash of gold sparkles, and I feel much better!

    I think it's because I used my new sugar scrub in the shower and made the effort to put scrummy body lotion on.

    Funny life!
     
  5. Miss D
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    Miss D Expert In Femming

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    That does sound sexy... Way to go! That'll keep the other students looking.
     
  6. dollyanne
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    dollyanne Sissy who loves pink frilly things!

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    Mistress Watchful, dollyanne feels that a Princess is still a Princess and a Domme is still a Domme whether dressed in silks and satins, or denim and cotton. It is true though that there is certain "power" clothing and accessories that makes a Domme feel more like a Domme and brings out the submissiveness in men, subs, and sissies, and that power attire usually involves leather, rubber, boots, heels, etc.

    But it is probably different for each Domme and sub. For dollyanne, something as simple as an anklet would be a powerful reminder, especially if a charm dangled from it like a chastity key or something. A ring, bracelet, or necklace could do the same thing. Even a certain pair of earrings. And, of course, heels and corset are powerful, though not practical for everyday wear!

    For your pet charlotte it may be something different. She has confessed to having a minor foot fetish, so something relating to the feet might convey that power. Maybe the anklet that dollyanne mentioned, or a toe-ring, or certain flambuoyant toenail or fingernail polish would be a powerful reminder.

    Dollyanne would also be affected by a leather belt that was sometimes used to render a spanking! Just seeing You wearing something like that would put dollyanne into a submissive mood immediately! And, maybe wearing such a belt would help You feel more Domme-like too! Especially, if You occassionally used it when pet charlotte misbehaved!

    Just a few lame ideas from a sissy gurl.

    Curtsey,
    :manga_angel:
    dollyanne
     
  7. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    I know what you mean dollyanne. I think my problem is that I "need" to look the part in some way to help boost my feelings and confidence.

    True... but it's actually quite easy to conceal corsets under thick winter jumpers, and they can be good for your posture!

    Oh, pet doesn't care! That's probably half the problem. Let's face it, if charlotte thinks I'm sexy when I'm covered in baby puke, I can't really go far wrong!

    That is a genius of an idea!

    Never lame dollyanne, always insightful!

    As usual I think my main problem here is more of a confidence thing that could possibly be fixed by rituals and care routines rather than actual physical appearance.

    Unfortunately this is a "comes from within" thing!

    I know in those times when I feel good, I can turn heads no matter what I'm wearing. You just exude that "Dominant" confident air.

    Thanks everyone for your ideas though.
     
  8. ladylionzsissy
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    ladylionzsissy male chastity sissymaid

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    Dear MsWatchful, perhaps this can help a bit...

    Mistress rarely wears 'scene clothes' at home and when She plays/trains me. typically She'll wear as comfortable clothes as She sees fit, but She loves to dress 'in leathers' when She, or W/we go out to clubs or have F/friends over to play in the dungeon. but i'm the one who's expected to wear a maid's outfit (serving uniform, dress, or corselette and apron) suitable for my serving position at home!
     
  9. xcitex2
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    xcitex2 Back from the past!

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    This IS where it is at for most men. Confidence is sexy with out a doubt. You ever look at an area of people and sort them out? There will always be the blonde, thin bombshell that men gravitate to. Ever wonder why she does not have the same guy each time you see her though? Then you look at what I call average people like you or I (we could always improve type) You will ultimately find that one girl where you look at and wonder how in the heck does she have That! guy or vice versa of course. Ultimately it is confidence. Fake or otherwise it is there. You notice as a male your odds of meeting women increase when you are in a relationship, why? Confidence is high and you are not looking (hopefully) therefore there is this ability to be yourself. Look deep within Mistress and you will see you already have what you need.

    Now in clothing all have offered great ideas. At uni find yourself what we here in the US call a Power Suit. Fits perfect in the campus but tells pet " I am the boss" Believe it or not it will tell others as well you are a force to be reckoned with. Put two powerful CEO's in the same room, male or female and put one in a power suit and one in casual business attire and people will automatically assume the former is more approachable but the other must be in charge. Have no idea but I studied with behavioral specialist for 8 weeks in the FBI. (Long story PM me f you really want to know) It is just odd.

    Now make no mistake about it. My wife could wear a pair of jeans but put on those sexy 5" heels and I am butter. If I get to see her getting dressed in the morning "knowing" what she has under the clothes say a corset, etc can be powerful. So it goes without saying that what is known by pet and not seen by others can have the same effect. I do hope that helps.
     
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