Down the rabbit hole.

The Journals & Blogs section seems like the right place for me to keep track of the goings on between my wife and I. I've already given a description of sorts of who we are and what we're doing in the Introductions section but I'll give a little recap and then take it from there.

I'm 44 and my wife is 36. We've played the chastity game several times in the past and mixed in some cuckolding, crossdressing and a few other satellite fetishes to chastity. I was locked back up again 8 days ago in Locked In Lust's The Vice Mini. I chose the Mini as I did the homework and knew it would fit. Previous devices have done the job but I felt that there was just a bit too much room in them. I'm 5.75" erect on a good day and slim in girth. I'm 6ft tall so certainly average in the manhood stakes. My wife is 5'8 with a curvy size 14/16 figure. We're a good fit but for a long time, I've wanted her to experience better endowed men and she has had a couple of such men but with limited success. That's enough of the recap for now.

So here we are, 8 days in to an unspecified amount of time with me in chastity. The longer the better as far as I'm concerned. Our previous best was 5 weeks and that culminated in a BDSM event here in the UK with me being paraded about fully feminized, plugged for the most part and being pegged privately at the end. It actually ended on a bad note. The event was a camping event, the weather was poor and we went ill prepared. "Let's not do that again" we both agreed. That was a year ago.

Similar talk has ensued about the direction I, or rather my wife, would like to take things. This past Friday night, after a little drink, my wife talked about how we have very little sex life these days as a result of careers and a growing young family. So chastity works for my wife. She can pick me up and put me down as she chooses. I get no release through masturbation so my horn levels increase daily (especially as a result of using BDSMLR and the now tame Tumblr), my attentiveness towards my wife increases also. Be it me showing her more affection or simply helping out around the house more which I have always done anyway, but she notices the little extras.

Going back to the camping event, only 5 weeks of chastity had rewired my brain quite a bit. Being plugged all day, every other day, obsessing over Tumblr posts relating to cuckolding and creampie eating/clean-up duties and other depraved thoughts had led me on one occasion to confess that I'd found a certain pop star, in his heyday, to be someone I found to be good looking. This confession tickled my wife pink and then she got the bit between her teeth. If she was going to "play" with someone at the camping event, then she definitely wanted to see me fluff that person. It was a goal of hers. For one reason or another, as I said, it didn't happen. But since that confession, my curiosity on the subject of forced bi activities gradually increased. Even during the chastity free months, creampie eating, clean-up duty on both my wife and imaginary lovers was usually at the forefront of my mind when I did get a chance to masturbate. Although I'd usually only edge. Occasionally I'd edge too far but I would stop and ruin my own orgasm normally. When I did, (often dressed in at least one of my satin pussybow blouses) I'd ejaculate into my hand and eat it, or on to another satin item and lick it off. It was like I was sub-consciously training myself to like semen.

One of directions that the conversation took on Friday night was her wish to see me with a cock in my mouth. She follows me on BDSMLR and Tumblr and referred to the posts I had been reblogging. Up until this point in the conversation we had been talking about chastity duration, buying lingerie together and even her looking for a regular lover whom she could receive creampies from for me to clean up and then she mentioned the fluffing. Being wound up, I made the mistake of not choosing my words carefully. I said, "It is something I've been wrestling with". She quoted me back immediately, followed with, "If you've been wrestling with it, you've been considering it. It's no longer a hard limit. I will take the doubt from you and it will simply be something that you do for me!" It made her SO horny. In one fell swoop, she was taking the choice from me but I found myself excited beyond words!

So that is where we are. A lot of talk. A lot of ideas. In the past, many plans have come to fruition but on the flip side, many have fallen by the wayside. What I am feeling about this latest episode of chastity and denial is a sense of purpose for my wife. As mentioned before, life has made it difficult for us to have sex anymore than 2-3 times per month so my wife has kind of gotten used to going without for weeks at a time, as have I. What I do know is that unless she chooses, I get nothing from my dick apart from pure chastity arousal. When my wife chooses, she can get the toys out if she wants a sense of being filled. The hollow penis extender if she wants to get the sense of having a male inside her or the option, should it present itself, of having another man altogether. I know what I want for her. The latter. Preferably regular and preferably bareback once she's gotten to know him.

 

There I was. Cock-fire sure that I had the Locked In Lust - The Vice device on correctly. The second smallest ring and spacer in use. But oh no. Pass me the face-palm emoji. I'd noticed a little movement between the cage and the spacer but thought that it was part of the design. I should have known better. I was busy painting at work when I felt something slip down the inside of my trouser leg. On lifting the trouser leg, the entire device, completely intact and with the padlock on, fell out and on to the floor! I didn't look to see if anyone had spotted the debacle but just hurriedly picked it up and put it in my pocket. I quickly messaged my wife to tell her, who thought it was hilarious.

When I got home I took the opportunity to give myself a thorough wash and shave and cleaned the device. I then got the smallest ring and smallest spacer out to try. It was then that I noticed the correct spacer installation method. The smallest ring wasn't going to fit so back with the second smallest ring and the smallest spacer. All correctly fitted this time!

It's all snug in the device and actually feeling much more secure. It's testament to the Vice's manufacturing quality that after 8 days, incorrectly installed, it didn't break or crack.

Fingers crossed that the next update will be a little bit more interesting.

 

Crossing the fingers didn't work. Only a day after commenting about how I found Locked In Lust's The Vice Mini anti-pullout part to have caused little, if any discomfort, upon removal for cleaning, I found bruises and swelling at the foreskin. Doh!

I've left it off for a few hours and the swelling has pretty much disappeared. Back on with a larger spacer to give a little more room and the wider anti-pullout part.

Always learning!

 

So here I am again, a year down the line. Our last dalliance with chastity was very brief and ended abruptly for reasons I won't go into, other than to say, my wife lost her mojo.....big time! Anyhow, I'm not sure how we got to where we got to recently but I'm going to enjoy it for what it is and not what hope it is to become.

It really came out of the blue to me but we were I indulging in some tenderness together and mutual masturbation when I told her to stop her actions. I asked her to stop for two reasons. Firstly, I didn't want to cum. Secondly, I didn't want to deal with the mess of cumming. A minute or so later and she started again. It was Divine! Lots of kissing, and whispering sweet nothings at each other and before long, I was approaching the edge. I left it as long as I dare. A dangerous game when you don't know if your partner is or is not going to stop when you say, but stop she did! Some more kissing and general effection later and she told me she wanted to feel me in her but not to cum. A third edge and PIV style! This was going to he tricky now!

A long story short, I held off tipping over the edge and we repeated this the following two nights. The last one ended with her telling me how she liked me so much more when I haven't cum and my reply was, "You know what to do then. Lock it up". And with her immediate blessing, we locked it up as soon as it had settled back down. I really couldn't be happier right now.

About eight months ago, I returned to work at a place I had worked at before. Only this time, my wife is the general manager of the hotel and now and again, she has me meet her in rooms for some fun. Today, she told me to make time for her, which I did. I found a vacant room and messaged her. A few minutes later she appeared. I asked her what I could do for her and with that, she sat down, hitched her silk dress up and told me to give her aural pleasure. After her muted climax, I very carefully put her nude coloured satin panties back on her and lowered her dress down again. We then parted ways.

It's safe to say that within 24hrs of putting my Vice Mini device back on, it is being tested! I love it!!!

 

Thanks!

 

Even though I have only been back in chastity 3 days, I hadn't had an orgasm for about 10 days prior, and a lot of my waking time now is spent thinking about everything you could think about pertaining to my chastity and fantasies around it and the thought of sucking a cock for my wife is never far away.

Who knows. We have no plans. We're taking it day by day for now. She is going to need a real "fucking" before long though and if she releases me with the intention of having me provide her with it, she's going to be disappointed. I know I will last only a matter of seconds inside her. In my twisted mind, I'm happy to be of no use to her in the bedroom department. In my mind, it seems inevitable that she will seek satisfaction elsewhere and I will remain locked indefinitely. But that is in my mind.

I've been given some chores to do around the house today and before leaving for work, she did say that if things are found to be to her satisfaction, I will be given a reward this evening. Hopefully it will involve release from the cage for a short time. I really want to downsize to the smallest ring and a step down in spacer on my Vice Mini. I wouldn't complain at an edge or two either!

 

I had my edge session a short time ago, at my wife's hand. Before coming upstairs, she did say that she was less than interested in it as she was at her most, let's say, unsexual time of her cycle but she was true to her word and she brought me to the edge pretty quickly. I kind of liked it in that, get it out of the way manner. It wasn't ruthless and cruel but business like.

Anyway, 15 minutes later and I was back in my Vice Mini with the smaller spacer and smallest ring. Bearing in mind that if what my wife says is true, and she is due on in about 8 days, then I have potentially another 12ish days of her apathy to console myself with.

I'm not going to grumble though and I'm going to continue to be extra attentive to her needs regardless.

 

The first night in smallest ring and reduced spacer was better than I imagined. Or rather, more comfortable than I imagined. Prior to having the Vice Mini, I'd had plastic and metal devices that allowed a fair amount of growing in them. CB3000, 6000 etc but now, everything is snug from the get-go. The reason for reduction in ring size and spacer was a simple one. During my first shower after being locked, things were relaxing a LOT with the warmth. Add in the soap factor and I had a testicle go rogue on me! Fortunately, I was able to manipulate it back through the ring and continue my cleaning routine. I will say this though, the actual vice part of the cage had my dick gripped and that was going nowhere so, for my money, the design works.

In other news, this morning I hinted to my wife that I wanted to go back to wearing women's underwear again. For the obvious reason of titillation but I also think that over time, my new found levels of attentiveness will only increase for her but it is up to her what happens.

In the meantime, here is my first image for the site and for reference, I am about 5.75" when aroused and 2.5"-3.0" limp.

 

Just a little update. This particular blog is likely slow down considerably for about a week. My wife has told me that she is unlikely to think anything of my chastity or sex in general for the next week or so. This always happens on the week or so running up to her period. She gets apathetic towards sex, being touched.....anything really. The last couple of days before, I have to really watch my step. She can become very hostile and argumentative.

Of course I knew all this before hurriedly putting the cage on. I've been wanting permanent chastity and orgasm denial for a while now and the teasing and edging can't continue perpetually. Rough with the smooth!

 

Something new happened yesterday evening. I asked to be released for cleaning and shaving and she agreed. She sat in the bathroom for the entire time, barely saying a word. That is the first time that I've been supervised for an unlocked service. The apathy throughout from her was quite surreal.

I kind of liked it!

 

Well, after what seemed like an eternity (almost 2 weeks), last night was welcome relief indeed! Not relief relief. Just a super pleasurable edging session! Of course, my wife's pleasure came first with a couple of orgasms from fingers and tongue combined. In fact, I don't think I've EVER felt her that wet before!

By the time she had finished her amazing edging of my dick, I was pretty wet too, with precum allover her stomach, which she had me clean up straight away. Delicious!!

We've both taken the day off work and there's talk of more fun while the kids are at school. I'm hoping for lots of satin, a strap-on and whole load more of teasing!

 

I'm coming up to a month of being locked now and so far, so good. A few hiccups with the device and it's Vice clamp part in the first week, but after ditching that, all seems ok. Night times have been very comfortable thankfully.

The only thing I would change within our dynamic (if I could) would be the amount of teasing/edging. Whilst the sessions we have had have been absolutely exquisite, it is like Crack! You just want more! We've had a handful of hand jobs and probably an equal amount of PIV edging sessions and the last one of the latter, I barely lasted 3 minutes of slow movement inside my wife it was that sensitive!

I am learning to back away from the edge a little sooner now. I used to find it all too easy get within a breath of the edge and then blow it with "one more touch". Backing away earlier means prolonged pleasure and I'm all about maximizing my pleasure while I have the opportunity.

My wife seems to be more at home with the chastity thing these days, too, which is a massive bonus. On previous occasions, it became more like a punishment for her. She saw it as much as a denial for her as it was for me and so she would quickly lose interest. Her window of sexual needs being much smaller these days, together with my increased attentiveness have made it much easier for her to live with. Add into that that I am not bugging her for stimulation every two minutes or walking around looking forlorn, I dare say she's a much more relaxed wife! She feels no pressure to stimulate my dick and I'm giving her her pleasure (almost) intuitively when she needs/wants it.

A week or so ago, during a PIV edging while in the spoons position, she reached 4 orgasms over the course of about 40 minutes! I've always been able to go longer in that position and it hasn't changed after a stint of chastity and denial. Believe me though, I was going so slow! Enjoying every millimetre of movement I was afforded. What was going through her mind that allowed her 4 orgasms though, I don't know? She may have been imagining another man to be pleasuring her? That's what I would always hope. Or what's more likely is, the very loving nature of our movements. The slow and deliberate movements. The matching caresses and kisses up and down her arm, neck and back. The nuzzleing behind her ears and her cheek. The whispering and my whimpering of pleasure? What I do know for sure though is that her need for hard and fast sex is increasing. She's already had one highly erotic dream involving two male former colleagues and she was quite excited to tell me about it!

My fingers are crossed that we continue down this chastity line long enough to see this Covid thing out and that she does take the opportunity to find someone to quench her needs for that more animalistic sex when it's all over.

In the meantime, between the sexually charged times we have together, I will continue to use my BDSMLR account for my needs. Just because I can't enjoy a full erection doesn't mean I can't enjoy trying to burst through my device.

 

Coming up to 6 weeks of being locked and I'm finding that the Vice Mini, with the smallest gap option to be very comfortable. Maybe it's down to my grower not being able to grow at all. I don't know. When excited, it fills the tube outwards but there's no painful pulling of the balls away from the body. Maybe a little bit, but it soon stops.

The big vents mean it's easy to clean too, so it's only been coming off for a deep clean, once a week. I am steering clear of wanting to try the vice part of the device again though. The unwanted swelling was not fun.

In other news, we're once again about a week away from my wife's period so any interest in teasing or tormenting me or having me pleasure her in any way has taken a back seat. Between, BDSMLR, Pornhub and Xhamster, I'm able to get some mental excitement so all is well. I am beginning to wonder when my wife will decide that enough is enough though. Before Christmas or sometime after Christmas? My heart wants things to continue as they are for the foreseeable at least but my mind knows that she must be itching to feel submissive herself. If only the world would present her with a very charismatic man that is well hung, knows how to use it and has a kinky streak too! Not too much to ask is it?

 

I could be reading the lines here. It happens I guess, when you've got chastity on your mind a lot but a parcel addressed to my wife has arrived today from Latvia. She told me that she was expecting my 10 year wedding anniversary gift from Latvia, but said no more. Well my wife is working late today so I'm looking at the parcel quizzical.

On the export declaration label, it has the word "padlock" handwritten on it? I can think of no other reason for me to have a padlock other than for my chastity device?

 

As it turned out, it was a heart shaped padlock inscribed with the words, "Forever Mine". It just happened to be a LOT bigger than she imagined so it is literally just a keep-sake with no actual utility. What it does have though is symbolism. Symbolizing her readiness to keep me locked for longer.....which makes me happy.

 

Edging sessions yesterday and the day before have left me somewhat partially drained. Literally! Last night we were enjoying some PIV edging. I'd been close about half a dozen times and thought I had another close encounter in me. The whole point of PIV edging is that I'm supposed to be in control and I must have been in control for about 30 minutes or so.

Initially I started off with a good pace in the Spoons position, my wife's favourite. Not a rigorous pace but a good one and within about a minute, I could feel that unmistakable sensation building rapidly and so backed off to a glacial movement. I savored every millimetre of movement and during it all, spoiling my wife's body with lots of hand attention and kissing. As I said, I took myself to the edge at least half a dozen times and then I stopped for a minute knowing that I was on the razors edge. Everything seemed to have subsided when I started again. My movements slow and small. The edge came quicker than I anticipated and so I withdrew quite quickly and rolled on to my back. I was kicking myself before the first sign of a cum leak and sure enough a few moments later, a small dribble emerged from my dick. At least it was a ruin and the mess was contained to a small one. I would guess that I lost between a 1/3 and 1/2 of my usual emission and as I lay there, my wife was a little sad for me too. I was then wondering if i was going to be instructed to eat the mess? My wife ran her fingers through the little mess and even scooped a little up but then just smeared it elsewhere on my torso. I left it a few more moments before getting up to get something to wipe it up with. My wife never said a word.

I sit here wondering if things would have been different had it happened inside her? I think it would but can't be sure. I then wonder if in the future, if that same thing happens, if I had began to consume my mess, how would she react? Do i want to go that route? I'd much prefer for her to instruct me to do it but then if she sees me do it voluntarily, would this trigger her into being more comfortable with the idea of procuring cum from elsewhere? So many thoughts!

I also asked her when everything calmed down if she was missing a "good fucking", to which she said that she wasn't yet and that she was enjoying the very close and intimate love making and that she would let me know when she did need it.

So yeah, in my book, an epic fail on my part but I think it could have been worse. Hopefully, the next time we're playing, things will come to a head quickly!

 

Here we are, coming up on 2 months of being locked up and I think (only think), that things could become quite long term. My fingers are crossed at least! The festive period along with the transition into 2021 would have covered the period of time in which my wife would have been sexually active with me and we would have indulged one and other with physical pleasure, but with all the mayhem that comes with any Christmas and new year, any such activities were pushed aside. Disappointing for sure but just one of life's little hurdles to overcome.

Last night, both of us feeling jaded from events and a 5km jog earlier in the day, we'd collapsed into bed and just put on the TV as a means of winding down. As time went by, my wife snuggled closer and her hand went down my torso and rested just below my navel and she then mindlessly played with the parts of my penis that were exposed through the device. No intentions. Just because she could. It belongs to her after all. It was a nice reminder that she hadn't forgot about it and it was a signal to me that she wasn't bored of the chastity thing, which could VERY easily be the case at this stage.

This whole pandemic malarkey is scuppering things a little as we have said that once rules are relaxed enough, we will ship the kids off to grandparents for a night and we'll have a hotel break for a night or possibly two and indulge in some kinky fun. She knows that I would love for her to take me with her strap-on as well as doing some dressing up and I know that she is chomping at the bit to have a really good and hard fucking. Obviously I will be wearing the sheath/extender for that. I literally wouldn't last 30 seconds with a vigorous pace!

 

And just like that, it was over. The fun was brought to an end and a vanilla life followed. Maybe if I could muster up some dominant soul from within myself, then maybe the fun could continue but when you're a natural born submissive and your wife is a dominant force of nature, that's a BIG ask.

Even the act of bringing the chastity period to an end is a form of control and when we do resume "kink" and I'm in charge, my wife will be calling the shots. Topping from the bottom, and I am somehow to find enjoyment from it? Brandishing a crop with my dick swinging limp and then being questioned about why I'm not enjoying myself? I could go and hire a nice looking prostitute and have my wife's cucquean fantasy played out but it would be a very hollow play and I'm not sure that I could rise to that occasion either. If I could, I'd last about a minute. That would be expensive, wouldn't it! And there would be no visibile signs of intimacy with a prostitute. It would be very mechanical and cold. That doesn't play to the cucquean dynamic either. Let's not even talk about how you get a nice looking prostitute into your house or hotel room without paying an absolute fortune in money.

The swinger and adult classifieds and various dating sites are absolutely pointless for procuring women that would entertain the cucquean gig. It's literally end-of-rainbow stuff. Bring into the equation my lack of confidence these days in terms of dating and it's a disaster waiting to happen. You can imaging the conversation. "Hi. Yeah, so my wife wants me to fuck another woman. Ideally in front of her. She wants us to humiliate her a bit too. By the way, I'm very average in size and have next to no stamina these days. Do you think you can get into that?" Any prospective accomplice would dry up and run for the hills so fast, you wouldn't see which way she went!

In the early days, we were both so adventurous. We visited a Pro Dominatrix (very expensive too) and had a good time. We went to a couple of adult BDSM related parties, gatherings and workshops and had fun. We went to swingers clubs and had fun. We have had adult fun with people that we know even. My wife moreso than me. But now, the idea of getting involved with other people (that aren't prostitutes, male or female) is seemingly abhorrent to her. How do you put a lid on kink like that so quickly? It's all highly confusing to me.

=================================

I wrote the above the morning after our chastity games ended. Somewhat gutted, not completely surprised but with a sense of unaccomplishment. There was no task or mission but there was certainly dreams. Dreams ranging from small and almost insignificant, to wildly ridiculous (in a vanilla context) ones that would, to my imagination, have grown out of smaller ones. A snowball effect. Dreams that I whole heartedly believe that we could have grown into together and with great enjoyment too.

Sure, I'm a man and I think and behave differently to women due to chromosomes, but I have often sought out the opinions of women on various kink related sites in order to form a balanced perspective. I'm also aware that for every real woman, (not porn actresses, or Twitter so-called "femdoms") that posts first hand advice and experiences on the internet, there are likely to be at least 100 men doing the same, but I think that that ratio is slowly closing as sexual taboos become more normalised and accepted within the wider community. So much so that a woman within our (extremely close) circle of friends and family has confided to my wife that she has slept with other men with her partners knowledge and consent and continues to vet potential suitors to this day. Am I jealous? You'd better believe it! Had this woman been exposed to that kind of activity 5 years ago, she would have been extremely judgemental and not in an encouraging way either. 5 years ago, my wife and I were perhaps at the beginning of the end of our sexual activities that involved 3rd parties and we were trying our best to ensure that things were kept under wraps.

I guess what I'm saying is that I dearly want my wife to find the sexual liberation that many other women are discovering and enjoying in growing numbers. Yes, of course I would benefit greatly myself from such liberation but I'm pretty bloody confident that so would my wife. I love her dearly and have every confidence in our marriage. I just wish that my wife shared my confidence.

So I'm in charge again and after pondering the dilemma I'm in, I think I'm going to play it with elements of what I hoped would happen whilst I was under lock and key. Especially the feminizing part of things, or certainly bringing in satin lingerie into things. Just because I'm a male doesn't mean I can't be topping in delicates, does it? I can tie and tease my wife whilst wearing suspenders, stockings and heels. And I can certainly give her a sound spanking whilst dressed in a satin pussybow blouse and satin skirt! I might even self lock my dick during certain hours? Should she want cock, maybe she should forego the real thing and have only fake ones. Who knows? I just know that if I am to get into it, I'm going to need some sensory stimulation myself as plain old sadism isn't going to work for me at all.

See you on the other side!

 

It's been 6 months. What have I missed?? At our end, vanilla became the norm once more. Any attempts by myself to exert any dominance in the bedroom were few and futile. We tried to spice it up by having sex at work (we work in a franchised hotel), but that lasted only a couple of months. Once the restrictions on leisure travel were lifted and the restaurant rebrand occurred, opportunities became much less frequent for that kind of thing and so quiet, missionary sex at home was to order of the day, a couple of times a month.

One thing that did go down was a conversation that I prompted about me wanting to wear women's style underwear (no bra. I don't have breaststroke, after all) full time and how orgasms for me are very disappointing. As for the panties/knickers thing, I just flat out told her that I would love to wear nice knickers on a daily, full-time basis. Not frilly sissy style but just nice, regular knickers. Ideally satin and/or silk. I told her it might increase my libido a little too, thus she would benefit from me wanting (even vanilla) sex a little more often. One of the stumbling blocks in previous years to making this change was our kids. Now they are both of an age where they want as little to do with us as possible and they want their own privacy. They really are not going to be barging into our bedroom or the bathroom when we're in them anymore. They do not wish to inadvertently see our privates as much as we don't want them to inadvertently see our privates! So that has transpired and every month, along with the new lingerie I buy for my wife, I'll be picking a set of knickers up for myself. And as it's a tactile, sensory thing for me and less so a visionary thing, I've discovered that Sulis Silks here in the UK do men's silk "underwear". Their items are almost identical in form to their basic women's briefs, only they don't do the more feminine colours so they are likely to be my next purchase to add to the collection of women's knickers that I already have.
https://www.sulis.co.uk/silk/Mens-silk-slip-brief-MB83.html#SID=104

The orgasm thing. I genuinely can't remember the last truly great orgasm that I had. The one that sends shivers through your whole body and makes your hair stand on end. More often than not for me, it's more akin to just peeing. It really is very mundane. Now the edge or the approach to the edge......that's where it's at for me. And this is what I explained to my wife. I even told her that if I was aware that she had climaxed already or at least made the sounds, then I would rather ruin my orgasm myself inside her if me cumming was something she wanted. There was another conversation there about her orgasms/faking it but I won't get into that here and now, but the cut and thrust of was that she agreed to allow this. So in essence, I'd be able to give her the sex that she needed orgasm or not, I would get to edge myself at least once and then ruin my own orgasm inside her and we'd both be happy. If I was feeling it, and especially if my wife wants the slow, grinding or gentle lovemaking, I could edge myself several times. Either way, we both get what we want!

Now for the reason for my return to the Chastity Mansion. With all that said, I do think that at the age of 46, my libido is increasingly waning. So with the best will in the world, knickers and PIV edging are not going to be enough for my wife. So after making advances a few nights ago and being rejected, the following night, my wife told me that she needed some sex. I was in a much better mindset and so I was able to oblige her. She told me the position she wanted and she told me that I was not to ejaculate......or else! Well, it was a great session and I edged multiple times but in the end, I over stepped the mark and had to ruin my orgasm. I felt it flow out of me and into her and held up my hand to it straight away. I was then told that that needed punishing and how else? Yep. I would have to go down on her and clean up my mess. Unlike the previous times (many moons ago), I didn't complain at the task handed to me. But before I did, I was made to beg her to clean her up, which I did. I then got down to the task and brought her to a clitoral orgasm as was scooping out the cum from her. I surprised myself at how easily I was able swallow our mixed juices that were HEAVILY biased towards sperm in terms of volume. She was satisfied in the end, as was I. I was then told that in the morning, I should find the chastity device and get it on and get used to it.

So that's where we are. I wonder how long it will last this time? I'm hoping that she sees how comfortable I am consuming my own cum and that after a while of doing it, she will perhaps be inspired to see if I can do the same after another man has been in her. That's a long way off and possibly pie in the sky but I need hope that vanilla sex becomes only a part of or bedroom activities. We opened the Pandora box all those years ago and my wife was able to close it for herself but I can't. Vanilla isn't even vanilla for me now. It's less than water to taste.

 

I have bought lingerie for my wife from Sulis but it was a long time ago now. I returned to the site looking for inspiration once again for my wife's needs. I just thought I would look at the silk for men part of the site and there they were! For well made, 100% silk items at reasonable prices, Sulis is good!

I would still lean toward more feminine colours. So the Ivory, Cranberry and maybe the Black from there. I may just go with their regular women's silk briefs though. Size 16 will fit nicely while I am locked up and they have an extra colour choice also. I could even splash out and get a "collection" set that would feature lace detailing etc. And although I did say that nice knickers were more of a touch sensory thing/fetish, I certainly appreciate the feminine details of "women's" knickers.

 

As for my libido, I think it is definitely more physiological than physical. I think that I have conditioned myself to find anything other than kinky adult fun, truly mundane and actually, quite a turn-off.
My wife knows that I am at her beck and call now, sexually. Last night for example, I did do as she wished by servicing her orally and I would never baulk at such a deed.

Thanks for the well wishes!