Dominating whilst in Chastity

When my guy and i first started chastity, we were under the agreement that I'd give him one day a month, on the first of the month, to be the Dominant one. When we first met he was Dominant, and I was submissive. Well, that didn't last long - no longer do i crave his aggression, bondage, spanking, etc. And he is the same way as well. He used to be the one who loved the aggression, now he needs the aggression from me. As time goes on, you may find the same thing happen to you - the tables may turn without you even realizing it.

 

This sounds similar to us, I was the dominant and over the years we started to switch. She still wants me to top her from time to time and I'm unlocked when it happens, problem is it seems to be happening less and less as we get deeper into chastity. She just doesn't seem to enjoy it as much as she used to and is really enjoying being the one with the control. I don't mind either, it's a nice change and works well for our relationship at this point and time.

 

This is exactly what has happened to us. I don't enjoy pain and bondage as much as i used to. He used to walk by and slap my behind - HARD and i'd get all frisky...now he just gets the stink eye, ha!

 

Once again, sounds familiar. I get the line "did I say you could touch me!" That's something I never would have heard in the past.

 

I had one partner that me being dominnat or the top whatever used to work very well. Not all the time but it was good when we went for it. I was equally often unlocked at the time but our main rule was I was not allowed to cum without permission and I may never ask for permission.

So it was great I got to do what I wanted, that she'd enjoy or push her boundries, I'd get to have piv sex, oral , anal you name it but I'd also remain denied.

 

I'm seeing a common theme here @Mistress_M is the same way. I've never been very good at being the dominant but occasionally she'll want that from me but it's all directed by her. I don't think she cares for me to be dominant at all anymore except for the every once in a while good doggy style fucking. As I said though she is still telling me what to do. Just like @Thatgirl and @nvrsaynvr63 said I too get the stank eye or a quick reprimand if I try any sort of spanking or show of me trying to dominate a little. My days of attempting to dominate are over.

 

I have been into BDSM for 47 years, most of that being dominated by my wife's girlfriend. Now it is just my wife and I and she is not into BDSM other than some ball and nipple torture with the occasion caning or paddling. Even when into heavy BDSM and now in chastity, we leave it at the bedroom door. I am and have alway been the dominant one. I am an alpha male to a fault and although will submit to a female during sex, that is as far as it goes.

Chastity is different because we cannot leave the chastity cage behind. It is with me 24/7. I also have to do what my wife says if I want a release earlier than a few months. She does not order me about as my Mistress used to do in the bedroom, but merely asks. I know that if I do as she asks she will be happy and more inclined to let me have an orgasm. Yet, I am in charge of our marriage so it is an interesting dichotomy since our power exchange pertains only to sex but what happens after sex can affect what happens during sex.

 

So, I think we maintain at least a very switchy arrangement and mostly with him staying somewhat dominant, so a bit different from what others have said.
For a long time we were very strongly D/s with me being the sub, and i loved that and I still do. As we had less time when kids came along things all got a bit vanilla, and there were always very switchy elements as he's very sure of himself and just naturally alpha.
The big irony as I've written about in another post is FEMALE orgasm denial is the thing we used to do loads, from the time we dated really, and I still love that (in fact right now we're doing mutual denial which is lots of fun).
But then, when buying some toys we added a cock cage to the list, and we both LOVED the effect on him. Mainly the elevated horniness, the greater desire for intimacy, it just all reignited the early passion we'd lost to some degree.
I would still unlock him at the drop of the hat if he told me to, although there are a few times where I'd stand my ground, but only because we'd have agreed terms or are having a game. And really he tops from the bottom quite a lot when we're playing, giving me guidance and subtle indication of what I should do. So it's ironic really, I can domme him well because he taught and let me!
So yes, I feel I've stayed substantially submissive while I put him in chastity, and it works brilliantly for us!

 

I have been a natural sub. My wife has always been sub as well. So we've both had to learn to be Dom. We still switch from time to time. She's become more dominant here these past few months. When I'm caged she tends to get more into it. Its a dream come true for me.

 

We are both switchy, and while I remain locked throughout the week, she really enjoys me taking the reigns so to speak when I'm free. We've both mutually agreed to have me denied as often as possible, but that still doesn't prevent me from being rough with her when I'm out. She loves being choked and manhandled, and much rather prefers me over any of our toys. It works out for the both of us, we both get dominated at different times while still having an underlying agreement not to let me cum no matter who is in charge.

 

Early in your relationship, I was Dominate over my g/f. I would get sex whenever I wanted and occasionally I would hogtie her or handcuff her to the headboard. Now that things have changed and I am in F/T chastity, I rarely restrain her anymore and if she does allow it, my device always stays and I am only allowed to give her oral, but I have to earn that privilege.

 

When we got together I was a primarily dominant switch. My GF had switch fantasies but was always submissive. Now those roles have kind of flipped, with me being more submissive and her being more dominant. We just kind of roll with the energy we create when we are together. We don't arrange the top/bottom thing ahead of time. It takes time to learn to read your partner like that.

Anyway, when I am caged and want to dominate, I make her beg me to take the cage off. It's really hot. I mean, the cage hurts me, but that just makes the endorphins run, so I hurt her more, and she's a pain slut, so she loves that, and... it's kind of a feedback loop for us.

Once the cage is off the power exchange continues like normal.

One thing we recently started to explore is penis extensions. If you want to continue to not cum while dominating and fucking her, pick up a penis extension. After experimenting a bit, My GF's favorite one is called the Oompf! on Amazon (that model can be found being sold under by a bunch of different names on Amazon, though). Anyway, I can't cum with an extension on, even after weeks of being caged. It's like fucking with a car tire on your dick. I can give her forced orgasms for hours, though, and they are much more intense than I can give her with just my normal cock (which is 6" long and over 5" thick). That is how I keep the chastity going while still giving her the fucking I want to give her when I'm dominating her.