Does online ever work?

Discussion in 'Online chastity and self locking' started by Feather Falling, Dec 30, 2018.

  1. Feather Falling
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    Feather Falling New member

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    This seems to be the best place to ask.

    Has anybody here ever had a long distance, online relationship envolvie chastity that has ever worked?

    If so, please tell your story.
     
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  2. latexbound
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    latexbound Not Locked

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    It can work when both people have trust, dedication and imagination, and of course, the time to invest in such a connection. I would say it helps if the two people have gotten to know one another before entering into a chaste-based relationship. I don't believe it can be effective (or satisfying) between two complete strangers. Folk on here may prove me wrong. Just my experience.
     
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  3. Feather Falling
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    Feather Falling New member

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    I think I would concur with your opinion
     
  4. Adam444
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    Adam444 Active member

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    I think it very much depends on what you're looking in that relationship. Are you seeking someone who will just keep you locked, perhaps with other submissive components or are you seeking an actual relationship with chastity being part of that relationship?

    In the former, I would imagine that you might be hard pressed to find a woman looking to keep you chaste just for kicks. At least for any period of time. If you want to go that route, then you'll probably need a professional domme.

    Certainly long-distance, relationships can work but they probably require more effort than dating someone locally and can get a little expensive. Finding someone who would be into chastity is probably going to take a little bit of work too. Let's face it, many women are going to be pretty put off by the notion of your penis being locked in a steel cage. If you do go that route, then it's important to discuss chastity early on, otherwise you could just be wasting her time.
     
  5. aussie_chaste
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    aussie_chaste Member

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    I went 28 days in a cb3k with the help of an online keyholder over 15 years ago. We used numbered locks and a webcam, and myself wanting it to work.

    You really need to be careful of topping from the bottom, and demanding all your kinks to be satisfied. Maybe all she wants is to know that she has someone's cock locked away and that is enough for her. What if she disappears offline for a few days or a week and ignores you? Can you deal with the lack of attention? Maybe your own thoughts will get the better of you and think she has abandoned you so you unlock yourself.

    But first you have to find a like minded person.
     
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  6. Breathe
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    Breathe Be true to yourself

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    Our story didn't start with chastity but it did involve meeting online and long-distance D/s from the beginning. I've written more about our relationship at length elsewhere if you'd like to do some further reading about us. I'll give you a brief summary here.

    We met online in a chatroom, five years ago. He lived in Canada; I was in the US. When our relationship started we were +1,300 miles apart. I moved for school a year later and cut that gap in half. We were close enough to meet by driving halfway. We did this roughly once a month. That arrangement lasted for about three years.

    We got married in 2017 and started the immigration process. A year and a half later, we're done and he's here with Me in the US. It's been a long journey to get where we are, but it's been indescribably worth it. We're about six months into living with one another full time and while there will always be ups and downs in any relationship, being under one roof has been life-changing.

    As others have mentioned, it takes work - just like any relationship. However, I found it comforting to connect with him on a transparent level through conversation first. It can be easy to jump the gun physically, when you meet someone intriguing in the flesh. We were forced to 'wait' and it heightened the experience for us both in the long run. The patience we've gained through living with distance has helped in other areas of life as well.

    As far as chastity goes, I brought it to the table while we were still long-distance. Just over a year ago now. It helped bring Me comfort in our physical separation and strengthened our bond by exploring a new facet of D/s. I'm not sure how this would work in a 'fresh' online arrangement, but the main thing our relationship has taught Me... is that anything is possible.
     
  7. Lilly O'Mally
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    Lilly O'Mally beloved doll

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    Thank you Breathe, this has been very inspiring. And thank you Feather Falling for starting this thread.
    Working online/long distance relationships are hard to find and people talking about them are even rarer - I often feel that such relationships are looked down on quite often. So I 'm very happy for this opportunity to tell a part of my story.
    I find myself currently in a very long distance online chastity BDSM type relationship. Basically I agreed to try taking a submissive role out of shame of something I had done and not realizing it's repercussions. My Mistress offered me this chance of atonement by living through what she had gone through because of my fault.
    She did not loose any time And dropped chastity as part of the relationship right onto me. But she would not let me do it unless I showed true conviction I wanted to do it for her. And that was it.
    I am now in an online chastity situation, without chastity device - not allowed to orgasm without her permission, and being teased hard on a daily basis for several hours. I used to masturbate two to give times a day, now I have been allowed to orgasm once in the past two weeks. I am fully devoted to doing this for my Mistress and I know that she is using my chastity induced state of mind to reach even deeper into me. Holding and shaping me to her will.
     
  8. TheMinistressGrace
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    TheMinistressGrace International key holding services

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    I knowingly provide keyholding for males all around the world, no matter the time zone :) I also, of course, hold physical keys for local wearers but not in the capacity I'd like.
    I have no romantic involvement with any of my wearers and don't intend to have. The kind of journey they embark with me is highly psychological, where the sex part is only used to create frustration and therefore, compliance.
    That said, most of my lockees are online. I have frequent ones, that I call my "golden wearers" (those that come back over and over but also, the distinctive ones that are able to go the extra.. week); I have challengers, those who take part to my games on Emlalock (some of which have become golden wearers meanwhile) and ordinary wearers whose relationship with doesn't really last (for different reasons: no real click between the 2, bad behaviour from their side, attempts of topping from bottom etc).

    How do I make things work for so many people (I had over 250 lock ups in 2018, each of different duration) at the same time (16 my max) ? I honestly don't know, I think it's only possible cause I love what I do :)
    But let me tell you that it's not a piece of cake. It's not easy when they whine, when they crack; it's a hell of a job to give tasks and check their perfect delivery, then punish when such is not attained.
    Being ALWAYS reachable, no matter what time of day or night, remembering who likes or needs what, make them feel special, help them out and correct, correct, correct - it's all hard work, time consuming, energy draining.

    But the satisfaction of results and what I get in exchange is a pay in itself. Besides the human exchange with mostly extraordinary men (I have the privilege of locking excellent minds in most cases), feeling appreciated, lusted after, loved unconditionally for what I give at the only condition of total honesty and devotion is an incomparable feeling of power, which is my first and ultimate goal in all of my D/s relationships.
     
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  9. Junebug15
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    Junebug15 Active member

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    Thank you for what you do. Hopefully a many don't take what you offer for granted!

    And some have all the luck. Lol Not all of us are that fortunate.
    I enjoy your post. Please keep them coming.
     
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  10. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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    Last year I went 115 days using the honour system under the guidance of a wonderful woman. I am now two weeks into a second spell with the same person. Yes, it works for me.
     
  11. Consensus
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    Consensus Member

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    Sorry, I have nothing of substance to add, but knowing just how much my Holder has helped me and how much I have apparently come to rely on her - thank You @TheMinistressGrace for all that You do!
     
  12. havke
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    havke Member

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    My BDSM journey started online. I lived in a small town without any BDSM related clubs nearby. There was a dominant girl who I meet online and talked to on a daily base. We more and more started an online type of D/s communication. This went further and further and at a certain time chastity was added. Using plastic locks and sometimes number locks which I needed to find out myself to get free.
    She loved to watch me struggle in the cage while she was getting off herself. For me the hornier I got, the more I craved submission a and her controlling me... It really worked for us... but like i said we were communicating online already and knew a lot about each other's kinks or fantasies.
     
  13. TheMinistressGrace
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    TheMinistressGrace International key holding services

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    Thank you guys for your kind words!

     
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  14. krystalasbaby
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    krystalasbaby krystalasbaby

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    Trust is the main thing. I have instructions on how long i am allowed out for cleaning, and i do report if it too longer, then i will get punished. To make it simplier for me to not unlock Mistress has me put the keys in a plastic baby bottle in the freezer. Simply put time to thaw that out is not worth getting caught
     
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