I visited a few pro domes who advertised KH services , but didn't find them interesting enough to suggest it . I had one time visits with each. Oh there was one I fell completely in love with ,but sadly she was only in town a week , and visits 3 or 4 times a year. Having attended many kinky meetings and been a member of several groups ,I always noticed there are 4 times the sub men than there are dominant women . These men are pretty sad looking to me as they watch alone . I was always with my hot commonlaw wife at the time . I looked at Backpage ,(put the name of any city next ).and clicked on domination and fetish and there are always plenty running ads. My thought back then was to have a relationship with a hot KH,who would be cheaper than a non pro that wants a lot of my time, and running errands and abusing me when I'm not really feeling it . AS it turns out I'm committing my self to my long term on,off again non pro Lady tomorrow,and giving her the keys to my padlock on my jailbird. it's very erotic thinking of giving my self up to her. I'm fantasizing asking her to photograph me in very embarrassing situations and holding them over my head to insure I don't take off for months at a time anymore . Don't know if I will suggest photo/videos, but while I'm aroused it sure is attractive . Thing is while caged I'm always aroused . We are not lovers ,just 2 people who share a need for each other. My Queen has never allowed me to hug,kiss ,or cuddle with her ,and I have no desire to . That's whu a pro Domme sounded interesting.
I have known some but never hired any. I worked my way through college working at my uncle's strip clubs in NYC. Two were famous. Some of the girls dominated guys off premises and just seeing how they were with the guys in the club and then how they talked about them, even laughed at them afterwards, turned me off to pay to play sex. They viewed men as ATM's and their job was to use a man's weakness to extract as much cash as they could. Some girls were nice while others were more jaded and had a low opinion of the type of men who visited strip clubs. Some were lesbians and not interested in men at all but acted like they were. I was never tempted to go to a pro domme. I went through a lot of girls to find those willing to try things and then train them. I was lucky in that my wife's girlfriend of 30 years has a dominant personality and took to S&M like a fish to water. She would sigh with pleasure at my pain and get very wet. She actually dripped down her leg while hurting me. That is what I need. I need to know that my domme is doing it because she enjoys it and not because she is being paid. I know you can do both, but as a consumer there is no way for me to tell if it is an act or not, knowing what I do. I cannot get into it with my wife because I know she is acting. She is tiny at 4' 11" and 90 lbs. She is submissive and a people pleaser. She can act the domme and we play at that but the fact that I know she has feelings for me and vice versa, I can accept the play. With a stranger I could not be submissive. I cannot even hire a prostitute and in Vietnam they were $3. I went to Sydney instead and spent a few weeks with a girl I met there. I need real feelings and knowing that my domme really wants to hurt me and not just pretending to because I am paying her. She can say she enjoys it but the fact that she will only do it if I pay means that she enjoys my money more so therein lies the problem. BTW, most of the women on sex forums are men. Try to get some to verify they are female anonymously and you will see what I mean. Pros of course are real woman but the rest are suspect. I know this from my younger days when I was a sub, non paying, to an online domme who turned out to be a guy. Then we found out when we went on the internet looking for a girl for a threesome and none ever verified in any manner of their choosing, that they were actually females. YMMV. I would say that there are about 10,000 submissive men to every real female domme on the internet. As far as chastity goes, I cannot think of any reason why I would want to forego orgasms or control of my penis for a stranger that I have no emotional feelings for. I am not anti orgasm. In fact there is a lot of evidence that more orgasms are medically better than fewer. I gave up my orgasms for the person I love who asked me to so that she no longer had to share me with other women in real life on in porn. I think that very few men actually pay for sex. There are a lot but as a percentage of the male population, they are a tiny percentage. Personally I know that if I look hard enough and not waste time with women not interested in non vanilla sex, I will find someone that is willing to learn to be a domme. I got through 55 years like that. Kiss enough frogs and you will find a dominatrix. The problem is that it takes time, a lot of time and few guys have the patience to wait. They want it now and that means paying for it and as long as you get value for your money, no harm done and everyone is happy. Nothing wrong with it. I think the sex trade should be legal as there are many guys who for whatever reasons, cannot find women to do the things they want done to them. It is not easy and women who will perform this service should be allowed to do so lawfully. It is just not my thing or what turns me on. When I piss off my wife and she takes out the wooden spoon or one of her paddles, that turns me on because it is a real punishment and not because I want it or am paying for it. I am funny that way but a lot of that has to do with my relationships with women whose job it was to separate men from their money. To this day I have no desire to go to a strip club but I used to bring my potential clients to them and get the girls to show him a good time and most times got the account. What they poor guy did not know was that when I paid the girl so would tell me in detail what his fetish was and laugh about it. I know not all are like that, but I just never wanted to be on the receiving end of that.
Wow ,Vinny What you say is sooo true. About the pros , I mean. My Queen never asks for a penny, and we both want what each other wants to give. I didn't give her the keys to my padlocked jailbird today ,because she noticed I hadn't shaved well enough . ( last night I removed my cage and shaved) . However , I did ask her to photograph me wearing nothing but thigh high stay up mesh nylons. I smiled for her camera in several different poses. I secretly desire to have her take me as her total slave and make it permanent . That's why I asked her to photograph me , adding the photos were so she knew I was under her control. My life began today.
I adored my pro-Domme. Yes I paid for my kink but I also spent a lot of non paid for time with her out of session. We were I thought friends too. I was eventually proved to be wrong but at the time I was happy I found my chastity commitment to her extremely rewarding. She did her masters on chastity too and that made things interesting as well. I was new to chastity and being a guinea pig was fun.