1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Did I think she would say yes?

Discussion in 'The Vault' started by ChasteCharlie, Jul 26, 2017.

  1. Well I didn't. I read about male chastity on websites and seen pictures of devices and had purchased CB6000 which seemed to be a popular choice with both wearers and key-holders. Over a period of months I had used it from time to time experiencing a strange thrill at being confined. However this is not the real start of this story for in truth my sex life had become non-existent with my wife of twenty odd years yet I still felt an urge that needed to be satisfied. I did not want to cheat on my wife yet I did not know how to broach any subject on how our sex life might recover. We had grown apart by focussing on things that we both enjoyed in our own way.

    Masturbation and fantasy became a way of life one that I wanted to share but in some way this did not appeal to my wife who I felt that I was looking to replace her with fantasy. That was always furthest from my thoughts as I love my wife dearly.

    I had stumbled on male chastity whilst surfing porn and it intrigued me. The thought of having my cock and balls locked in such a fashion as to deny both and erection and orgasm arousing; so I had bought a device.

    The question was how to introduce it to my wife and would I feel comfortable wearing it? I decided to try getting use to the cock piece and ball ring – which I did by trying different combinations of the components supplied. Once I found the right combination I wore for longer periods of time always having the key to the lock with so that I could release myself should it become necessary. Eventually I would lock myself up and leave the key at home so that I could not unlock myself, this providing additional stimulus. But I really wanted to involve my wife and the question was how to do that?

    In our bedroom by the side of our bed are two sets of drawers. In then we keep underwear and my wife when she finishes ironing she puts the fresh clothes away in the appropriate drawer. I decided to put the device in a drawer, slightly hidden so that if she rummaged around she’d find it. I thought that if she did she might say something but after a few weeks it soon became clear that if she had found it she wasn’t going to say anything and I wasn’t going to mention it first. I didn’t want a bedroom argument that could have gone seriously wrong – I assumed that my wife didn’t want the same.
    So how could I brooch the subject without ending in tears.

    I decided on further online research and came across a website ‘Male Chastity Journal’. Here was a man who had gone through a similar path to my own and had persuaded his wife to be the key-holder and was writing about his experiences and giving advice. I looked around and found more which helped me decide what to do next.

    I was due to go to London for the day and I decided to write my wife a letter and leave it in my underwear drawer knowing that whilst I was away she would probably be ironing and putting clothes away where the chastity device was kept. I typed the letter because I wanted to make sure I got my words right and wrote:


    In case you’re wondering, the lump of plastic that you can see in this drawer is a ‘male chastity device’ and it helps me to control my urges to masturbate. How it works is that a plastic ring fits behind my balls with my cock fitting into the penis shaped head. When you join the two pieces, you can lock together with the padlock.

    I suppose it may seem strange the idea of locking my cock into a little cage but it’s something I’ve been interested in for some time; with the thought of forcibly preventing an erection and orgasm being quite arousing in a strange way and if you had control of that would be doubly so.

    So, how do you feel? I purposely left the device visible so that you could think about what it was and what my intentions were. I hope you’re not shocked or disappointed and consider what I’m about to suggest.

    What I would like to try is for you to become my ‘key-holder’ and be the person who allows me a form of sexual release. I’m not sure how this plays in your mind but I would suggest that I lock myself up for two weeks with you holding the key to my release. During the two weeks we can explore how we feel and talk about it. After the two weeks we can decide on the next steps. What do you think?

    If you want to give it a go then you can do one of two things. You can leave the unlocked device where it is and take the key or you can take the key and put the device on the desk in the office. You would keep the key with an agreement that you would release me after two weeks.

    If you don’t want to participate, leave things where they are and I’ll respect that with nothing more being said.

    I don’t want you to feel pressurised in anyway as I truly love you with all my heart and there has never been anyone else

    All my love’

    I wasn’t sure what reaction I would get but nothing was said on my return from London and even as we cuddled in bed that night nothing was said. It was the next morning after we had had our morning ‘in bed’ drink of tea and subsequent cuddle that I told my wife that I loved her and she responded, “Does that include your balls.”

    I said, “Yes,” and moved to kiss her cheek saying, “do you want to lock me up?” She replied,” I’m thinking about it.”

    The subject had been broached!

    What happened next

    I wasn’t sure what to do next as I had to admit I expect her answer to ‘No, I’m not interested’ so I did a bit of research on the net and article by Saskia Zenn - He Wants You to Lock Him Up!

    I read it and printed off the article and gave to my wife saying I thought it would help her understand how I felt. I particularly liked the introduction as it summed up how I felt at the time I decided to ask her and explained what it meant to be a key-holder, a phrase I liked because I knew that she wouldn’t see herself as a ‘Mistress or Goddess’. She also doesn’t see herself as dominant but there are times when she and be assertive and brook no nonsense.

    Nothing was said when I gave the article to her and it was a week later when I asked her again if she would lock me up. Her response was only in the house and my heart leaped with joy and I thanked her and cuddled her saying she had made me very happy.

    The following morning, which was a Sunday we were having a drink in bed when I gave her the CB6000 along with the lock and one key. I explained that if she was going to be my key-holder she could have custody of the device and choose when to lock me up. She took at the device from and then asked where the second key was. I showed her that it was in a safe place and was in case of emergency. She then asked if it fit because it looked uncomfortable and I told that it came with different rings to aid correct fitment and the combination she held was correct for me.

    She then explained that she had never heard of male chastity before and her only knowledge was through history and female chastity; I sensed that she was a bit overwhelmed and gave her a cuddle telling her how much I loved her. She then put the device away.

    So the next move is up to my wife and at her pace; she may lock me up, she may not, I’ll have to wait and see.

    First Lock-up

    As I went to bed two weeks later and with my wife already in bed that I saw the chastity cage sitting on my beside table. At first I thought she had rejected the whole idea of locking me up so I put the device in the drawer of the table and then realised that the key was missing. I then realised that this was the signal that that she was prepared to give this ‘male chastity thing’ a go.

    Picking up the device I took my pyjamas and went into the bathroom to do my ablutions before fitting the cage.

    I have to admit that there was a stomach churning excitement as I tried to fit the device around my hardening cock although some cold water enabled me to get it on.

    Going back to the bedroom I can’t explain how I felt as I got into bed and cuddled my wife. Nothing was said but my affection for her soared as we kissed and said goodnight to each other.

    Through the night it was mostly uneventful although we did cuddle each other from time to time and in the morning before we got up she asked me if I wanted to be released – I declined and wore the device for the rest of the day. It’s now day three and I’m in her hands as to when I’ll be released!
  2. You seem to have approached this in a very good way, taking your time, doing your research and leaving the decision up to your Wife. Good luck with moving forwards. It has been an amazing time doing this with my Wife, it has really reinforced our relationship and brought us together even stronger than we were before. I hope you have the same amount of fun I have. I would also say it has helped to improve me as a husband by giving me the impetus to find new ways to make my Wife happy.
    MadamBelle and NsToy like this.
  3. Perfect! Do keep us updated as things progress.
    NsToy likes this.
  4. Thanks for the encouragement. I'll let you know how it all progresses.
  5. Absolutely brilliant! Thanks for sharing!
  6. Good luck it can be a very exciting and great adventure for the both of you
  7. Great post! Keep us updated as time goes by.
  8. I'm incredibly fortunate that my wife and I have never actually had an argument. What we have had are many conversations while lying in bed together about our frustrations with each other, resentments, annoyances, how we felt about it all, how we hoped to move forward. And yes, some have ended in tears for one or both of us. I absolutely hate starting a conversation while knowing it will inevitably include heartache on both our parts. But, it is absolutely essential, at least for us, that these things get out into the air. You can't fix a problem until you identify it and name it.
    How could she possibly know about a building annoyance if I didn't admit it to her? I mean, she isn't a mind reader, and I'm not doing us any favors by just swallowing those feelings. And vice versa. A handful of times we have had to let an issue be for a day or two and come back to it because we couldn't see a solution clearly, but that's been rare. Most of the time we end up on the same page. The problem doesn't necessarily go away, but we get on the same side so we have the same perspective which makes it possible to work together on a solution.

    So, I guess my point is not to shy away from a conversation just because you know it will be painful.
    MadamBelle likes this.
  9. Thought I'd give you an update........ After five full days in chastity my wife asked if I wanted to be unlocked. I said it was up to her............. I'm still locked!!
  10. sounds like she might be enjoying it ;)
  11. Just wait until she learns that her orgasm is actually the only one important. Depending on if she cums from your tongue or your penis decides if you even need to be unlocked
    Allen1987, Sublifter49 and ineverknew like this.
  12. I agree with queensbitch.
    Once she gets over any selfish feelings about you and embraces sex for her own pleasure without reguard for yours then the fun begins or your in deep doo doo!
    Allen1987, MadamBelle and Queensbitch like this.
  13. My wife is telling me she is starting to see the benefits and enjoy it as well... she has started to take more control as the weeks pass... good luck sounds like things may be moving in a positive direction. Keep us informed
  14. Last night I was unlocked so I could take a shower and clean the cage before relocking myself and putting the key on her bedside table. Later that evening when we came to bed I hoped I might be released but it was not to be.
  15. Release

    After fourteen full days of chastity I have been released by my wife. This was something I had suggested as a starting point when I had first broached the subject of me being locked and whilst she offered me the opportunity to be released during first few days I had said I was OK. It’s hard to put into words how I felt during this time but I do know that by day 12 I was feeling very horny so that when I was released I was ready to jump on my wife. However that was not to be as after unlocking and removing the cage she was keen to see had not suffered any injury. So I was happy just to cuddle up and go to sleep and the following morning we talked about how we felt. I explained that not being able to pleasure myself meant I felt a stronger emotional attachment to she said she was sure how she felt but had enjoyed the attention I had given to her over the past few days.

    What was interesting was that during the rest of the day she was at pains to take every opportunity tease me with little words and gestures that had me champing at the bit to make love to her. But this was all about her and later that evening we kissed and cuddled with more passion than I could remember in a long time and whilst we didn’t have sex, she teased me by bringing me to the edge three times before stopping to allow me to fondle and kiss her breasts before we both went to sleep.

    I am now looking forward to two more free nights before I’m relocked and hope very much the I’ll be allowed to come.
    Mark Owen, Anonoman and ineverknew like this.
  16. Epilogue

    The adventure begins! After a full week of being unlocked my wife surprised me on Sunday morning by say tonight I think you need to throw the dice.

    This may seem strange but having been unlocked after a fortnight in chastity my wife and I talked about what should happen next. Although she was still felt a little wary she was not against the idea of having me caged, having enjoyed the additional attention I’d been giving her and the teasing sessions she had given me following my release. After some thought we decided that we would use chastity within our relationship but with a slight twist.

    Thinking how it could work for both of us we came up with a dice game where the throw of the dice would decide the length of time I would spend in chastity. At the end of that time I would throw a dice to determine the length of release which wouldn’t be more than five days. As the dice has six sides, throwing a six would lead to a tease or orgasm session - whichever my wife chose - followed by a throw of the dice to indicate the next length of chastity and immediate relocking - that is no release days, added an extra dimension to the game.

    So on Sunday night the dice was rolled and I’m now locked for the next seven days before I throw the dice to determine the length of my release or other.
    Mark Owen and ineverknew like this.
  17. Now three months in and for the first time I'm in chastity with no known release date!
  18. Your experience is a textbook example of how to make it work. Could you please elaborate about what happend after she agreed? She locked you up for a pretty long time. Have you studied this subject together, and how did she learn what's important and what not? What was the key to match each other's sexual wishes. Does 24/7 work for the both of you?

    I loved reading this and makes me dedicated to make it work as well.

  19. First of all I wouldn’t say that it’s a text book example as everyone is different. At the moment we’ve been using chastity as a way of enhancing our love life. I had been self-locking for short periods for some time before getting the courage to ask my wife to consider being my key-holder. I was frightened that it would go horribly wrong and her initial reaction was a relief when she said she would consider it. I had done a lot of web research and this website certainly helped in giving pointers particularly from some female members who gave a perspective on how they reacted when asked by their partner. I also didn’t rush it; once I’d asked the question I didn’t press for an answer and it was a full two weeks before she said yes. My reaction was euphoric and the initial lock up of two weeks fitted with our lifestyle and love-life. During that time I was certainly more attentive than I had been but with no expectation of her – something she appreciated.

    After the initial lock-up we talked about the experience and she was more concern with the impact of the device on me rather than being demanding herself. From the forum there was some mention of ‘topping from the bottom’ but our relationship wasn’t about male or female domination it was about a shared experience with each of us leading. For example to remove any pressure I put together a dice game as a method where control of lock up was in the hands of the dice. This made it easy for my partner to elect the number of days locked by rolling the dice. That worked well for a month or so and then she changed the rules which lead to longer lock ups.

    As what on the forum would be called a ‘vanilla wife’ she is only interested in what works for us and hasn’t studied any particular aspects of male chastity. She knows what she likes and what she doesn’t and I don’t push as I’m happy that she now shares my ‘kink’ for want of a better word. Also without any pressure she has regained an interest in teasing me which we both love, particularly when I’m locked something that had fallen by the wayside several years ago. I think it would fair to say that chastity is helping us rediscover ourselves and our love-life that had stagnated over a period of time.

    Regarding 24/7 it has a place but doesn’t rule as there are everyday issues and events that require a period of unlock and we both agree that this is how it should be. For example I was looking for a full lockdown during October (Locktober) but my wife decreed a 10 day break. However there was an upside, when we relocked the dice wasn’t brought into play and now I don’t know when I’ll be unlocked.
    Pietje12 likes this.
  20. I take off my hat for you and your wife. I wish I could deal with this in such a patient and respectful way. I especially love the part in which you describe your wife. A definition of this forum could apply to her, you are not saying it yourself. Again, you're an example to me as I let my emotions take over too quickly, causing unfair judging.

    Your wife is pretty awesome too based on your description. She doesn't judge either, plays along and even takes it a step further with teasing. To me that's a clear sign that she sees you, loves you and tries to make you happy. The both of you focus on the good parts. Again, I love this experience, please keep us updated.
    ineverknew likes this.
  21. Perfect!

    Again, perfect!

    IMO, you did all of the right things. Congratulations ;)
  22. Hi ChasteCharlie,
    I am glad to hear that were able to turn that situation into a win-win for both of you.
    I am facing a similar situation where my wife does not see the full benfits yet.
    I am planning to use the following audio file to convince her, let's see what happens.
  23. Good Luck, it wouldn't work with my wife she hates the sea!
  24. I very much wish I had taken an approach much more like you did. I might be enjoying some chastity play with my wife now if I had. Happy for you two.