Due to a mistake on my part that caused my Beloved to second-guess Her authority and my obedience W/we have agreed to a gag order/moratorium imposed on me. In order to allow Her time to regain Her confidence and control i am forbidden making any mention or insinuation concerning sex and chastity for the next 6 months. Today is the 20th of January and unless She brings it up, i won’t mention any facet of it or hint at it before July 20. Anyone else ever used this method to help strengthen and empower their wife/partner/keyholder?
Simple, selfish and stupid—all on my part. i had asked for some sexy sleepwear, all satin and lace undies and camis. She wanted none of that and said She’d find some to her liking that weren’t so fem. A few days later i showed Her some satin pjs and She was very upset with my selection and impatience. She was hurt. i mean tears and self-doubt about Her place in my eyes. So, i accepted the blame and responsibility and made the offer of 6 months silent chastity to reaffirm Her control and restore Her confidence so She can determine this is going exactly as She envisioned.
Is there more to the story or some backstory that explains her response? Tears and self-doubt seem like an overreaction to what seems fairly minor. I'm also confused as to how ignoring an issue for 6 months is supposed to help her gain confidence, but I've always been the type of person that gained confidence from trying, failing horribly, trying again, then eventually getting it right.
Her tastes and desires have changed over the years and mine are kind of stagnant. In O/our earlier years W/we were quite adventurous and experimental. Both were bi swingers. As a couple She would occasionally even make me up and there was a small collection of lingerie just for me. Move forward a few years and at 68, Her desires have wained a bit and She knows mine are still running at 120. Her views of the alphabet people have changed, also. She still feels they have the right to be who/what they wish, but She doesn’t like the militant force they use, so she put that part away and finds the ‘in your face’ group very distasteful and doesn’t wish to have it in O/our lives. That includes the fem lingerie that i enjoy. So, i have to learn to put it away, also. And when i continued pushing it, She felt i was taking back over and didn’t trust Her judgement anymore. She feels i’ve been a little pushy lately, and She’s right. So, the silence on my part doesn’t end or ignore anything. It puts Her voice first, foremost and only so She can see i can behave, once again. She doesn’t demand much, but when She does, She expects Her little chippie to perform exactly as prescribed. She doesn’t want to be challenged, at all. So now, She has 6 months of no input from me, unless requested, to prove to Herself that i’ve learned my lesson.
I don't read him as saying they're "ignoring" it. I read it as he has a bit of a topping from the bottom by trying things issue, and they're working on that by silencing his suggestions and allowing her to make all suggestions.
If she thinks your needs make you one of the “alphabet people” (a term which I think is somewhat belittling), and more importantly if that’s a problem for her, you may have issues that six months of non-communication will “surprisingly” fail to fix. Just MHO.
I don't get it. What do you mean by ''desires running at 120' and who are the 'alphabet people'? Do you mean you have a higher libido than your other half and she dislikes LGBT folk? What relevance does that have to your discussing your desires to wear femme nightwear (interpretation on my part) and her confidence. If she is forbidding you and expecting 'her little. Chippie' to perform, then it does not read like a lack of confidence on her part to be honest.
I have been failing for two plus years now. A wise man once told me “it’s ok to burn your hand more then once, just don’t burn it in the same spot”.
Sounds to me like you have become increasingly incompatible over time. You may have some tough conversations ahead.