Complicated start

It's funny but when we were talking about what had happened I actually said to her I felt like I was from a completely different solar system, let alone from Mars!

My Wife is definitely taking to this change in our lifestyle, that is one of the things that confused me so much. I honestly think that if we can ride the roller coaster successfully over the initial ups and downs that I will be wearing a chastity device for good. Not permanent chastity perhaps, who knows, but only let out on the honor system like you. That is going to happen today as I am going swimming later.

 

What an absolutely incredible weekend. I have spent two really busy days working and doing as many jobs as I possibly could with my Wife. I don't just do these jobs because of the new FLR dynamic we are reinforcing, I really love doing things that please my Wife.

For reasons I can't go into my Wife and I spent several years living in different houses. This was due to our jobs and an impossible commute distance that involved hours of trains, planes and automobiles. That period is over as of a few months ago and we are busy squashing two houses back into one. This has been particularly hectic as we are desperate for a tidy house for Christmas.

We had both been working really hard and needed a shower. I had been out of my HTv2 all day as we had been swimming in the morning. After the shower she told me to give her a body massage and I asked her if she wanted the full works and got told to just get on with it. I was busy finishing with my tongue and fingers when she pulled me up and told me to make love to her. It was exquisite and although we didn't quite manage to orgasm together I was only a few seconds after her. It had been a month, a week and six days since my last orgasm.

Everything I wanted to happen with the male chastity happened. The feeling was intense, the most powerful orgasm I have had in years. The feelings I had for my wife post sex was absolute adoration, the fact that she had in her words decided to reward me with her body meant more to me than I can possibly put into words. Even now, a few hours later, I cannot quite believe what happened. All I know is I want to continue with the chastity and FLR even more, with what I hope are at least a similar amount of time between orgasms.

After we finished making love I asked whether she had planned the session or whether it was on the spur of the moment.

She told me I wasn't allowed to ask.

Yes.

 

Something else happened tonight that in a way had even more impact on me than the love making.

When we had the shower my Wife got out first, to let me wash myself. She always gets in first and only lets me in once she has finished washing her hair. I get into the cubicle and wash her back for her, paying special attention to her lower back, thighs and bottom. My wife lets me know I have been good by washing my back for me too. She has a cute giggle if I am caged and I start to swell from her attention.

Tonight I was uncaged. The last time I was uncaged I noticed that she left the shower cubicle door open when she got out. She didn't say anything, just stayed in the bathroom until I had finished, got out and dried myself. During our previous shower though I was caged. When she got out she shut the cubicle door fully. When she got out tonight she left the door open again.

My heart soared! She had decided, on her own, to keep an eye on me, to ensure I behaved. She trusts me implicitly, she let me be on my own at the swimming pool unattended this morning. It didn't make me feel ashamed that she wanted to keep an eye on me, it made me feel like she really cared and really did want to be involved. This is massive for me, so very important. It is the perfect response to my most recent crash of confidence.

I told her I had noticed and how happy it made me. She smiled, and, well, I have already told the story of what happened next.

 

It is that time of year where life just takes over and getting everything done for Christmas takes priority. We are going to have a few days back in England visiting family so all this chastity stuff will get pushed to the background until well after festivities are over.

That said I am happy. My Wife is definitely showing signs of becoming increasingly confident that what we are doing is what I want and probably something she is now very comfortable with. Last night she asked me to do something and when I was a bit tardy she let me know in no uncertain terms that she wanted it done immediately.

I have been reading other people's posts about how chastity has changed them, in particular how not being able to masturbate changes their view of women as sexual objects. I think I can identify a change in me. If I upset my wife in any way,where before an apology would take a long time to come from me (if at all) now I apologize almost immediately. I think that the fact that I am constantly trying to find ways to please her has made me focus much more on her emotions.

Time to get up and make breakfast.

 

My Wife continues to shock me. I would not have guessed some of the things she has said or done recently. A few days ago we went shopping at a German Christmas Market and ended up in Karstadt, a large German department store. My wife bought herself some new tights (Strumpfhose!) and having looked at all the choice and designs I commented that 'you women get to wear all the nice clothes'.

Without a pause she told me to buy some for myself!

At the time it didn't really register, and now I regret not having bought some. I have never thought of cross dressing before, and had never heard of feminization until I discovered male chastity. It isn't something I seek as such, but the people on this forum who do cross dross or have been feminized are definitely having an impact on me. I think I would cut a scary figure if my Wife did decide that is what she wanted and I am exceedingly hairy, so shaving would be a mammoth task. A wooly mammoth at that!

This is one of those moments where I really do wonder where all of this is going.

 

@wishful Thank you so much for your kind comment. One bit in particular resounded with me, about how it isn't the body that affects you but whose it is. I have been telling my wife this for years, and I think I am beginning to get to a point where she believes me. We are both getting on into late middle age so we are not as tight bodies as we used to be, but she above all else still gets me worked up and horny.

The fact that you have been able to come back from such a bad time as two years without affection is amazing. Did the move to chastity have anything to do with that? It is amazing how often I hear that. It didn't exactly save our marriage but it certainly has given us a very strong foundation on which to improve it beyond anything we would have otherwise had.

@Malagacouple Thanks. I look forward to reading about your own journey. I really do wish that my wife would get involved as I think it would help me massively to understand how she feels and what she thinks. The fact that both of you are doing this together and communicating with each other is so very important. I never wold have guessed how difficult this transition can be, it shows how worth the effort it is that so many people stick to it. And you are so right. If anyone starts talking about 'rules' to you, don't listen. It is a mistake I made at the start and I very nearly blew it. My Wife felt like the rules were taking over and making it not fun. Now the only rules are hers.

1. Due to how I tend to become overwhelming with regards information and ideas I can only start a conversation about chastity and sex on a Saturday. My Wife can start a conversation any time she likes. I can join in with the discussion if she starts one. My Wife always has the right to decide a conversation is over.
2. It is a penis. Call it a penis. Not a dick, cock, todger or any other name, a penis. Balls on the other hand is fine, testicles is such a silly word, scrotum is even worse and neither really describe the entire package.
3. Some discomfort wearing the Chastity Device is to be expected. Debilitating pain isn't. If the device is hurting to the point of breaking skin it needs to be removed.
4. Only my Wife has the keys.
5. My Wife decides when and how I have an orgasm.

Remarkably simple. These will no doubt be added to over time, but that is it. The rules. We haven't discussed punishments yet, haven't started any games, we are just getting used to the day to day reality of me wearing the device and my Wife controlling me. It has been a bumpy ride at times but on the whole we are really happy with how it is going.

 

Vows! What a great way to put it! As you say much better than rules or contract.

I have read about people having a ceremony in which they set up a more formal Chastity based FLR and although I cannot see us going that far a personal ceremony with vows would be an excellent way to really make a commitment.

 

Agreed. It was 18 months after she said yes before we got married and I have no desire to try and rush anything this time.

 

Hi @jemima - if you ever have the chance you should definitely go to a proper one in Germany. They are absolutely amazing, the smell of honey roasted almonds, glühwein and roast Bratwurst is amazing. I love them.

I went back to Karstadt today and bought myself my first ever pair of tights. I put them on when I got home, they feel fantastic! My Wife knows, I showed her when she got home from work, and she approves.

 

I am in the enviable position of being able to drink Glühwein whilst wearing some tights! I am hoping that this time next year I will be able to wear them more openly, as by then our youngest son should be at University, and not under our feet all the time.

I wonder what he would think if he knew all my nagging to get on with his studies is partly motivated by my desire to sit at my Wife's feet of an evening, wearing my tights with a nice little skirt, instead of hiding them under my trousers! If he doesn't pass his A levels I'm going to be stuck with him in the house. That said I now need to get the guts up to tell my wife about how I would like to wear a skirt...

I tried to tell her earlier while I was starting to get dinner ready, but didn't quite manage it.

 

By the way I cannot quite believe I have admitted that to myself yet, let alone telling my wife. The Chastity Mansion has a lot to answer for!

 

It's mild in North West Germany at the moment, but not that mild!

 

So I got the guts up, in a roundabout sort of way, to talk to my wife about what I do next regarding wearing the tights. I told her that I was nervous about asking what to wear because I really am scared of upsetting her. My confidence is low and I have identified that I have a deep insecurity about doing anything because of the possibility of it having a negative impact on her.

I asked her what she would wear with tights, knowing full well that she would probably say either a dress or a skirt, which she did. I then said that I was hoping that she would tell me that is what I had to do, so the decision was hers.

She then giggled, and said maybe I should try wearing a skirt!

I am getting an attempted erection in my HTv2 just thinking about that giggle.

This isn't going to happen any time soon, at least not anywhere apart from in our locked bedroom, not with our 18 year old son in the house! But it will happen.

Bloody hell.