Chastity & WFH Masturbation Issues

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by JT_1999_, Sep 19, 2022.

Random Thread
  1. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    One of the reasons I am getting serious about trying chastity is WFH.
    Working from home has allowed me to abuse myself to a point I do not want.
    Im sitting at a computer, alone, at home, all day, most days. Its become a problem.

    Anyone here use chastity to stop their wfh habit? I know a properly secure device is rare without a PA but just having my wife be aware and paying attention to my caged status would be helpful, i think.
     
  2. DonnaSue
    Offline

    DonnaSue Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2015
    Messages:
    2,619
    Likes Received:
    3,938
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Southeast US
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    My Mistress set up a camera, viewable from Her phone, aimed at my computer workspace. I never know when She is watching. She comments often about where I am and what I'm doing, so I know that She checks on me. (Knowing this has prevented me from watching porn or being dishonorable!)
     
    Headtrip, ozzy-one, Rectrix and 2 others like this.
  3. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    I'd probably be encouraged by her to still look at what I want, just no touching. Which might make me not want to look anymore?
     
  4. DonnaSue
    Offline

    DonnaSue Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2015
    Messages:
    2,619
    Likes Received:
    3,938
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Southeast US
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    If She saw porn on my computer screen, whether I were doing anything or not, I am sure that I would immediately be wearing the dreaded KTB. With that thought always lingering in my mind, I never even consider it anymore.
     
    Madam Darling and JT_1999_ like this.
  5. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    See my wife and I like to look at porn together, she likes to tease me about teasing me with other women.
    She knows wearing panties in front of her friends is a humiliating fantasy of mine. ( one we'd likely not act on, so porn it is!)
    Or She comments on the size of the equipment or the beauty of the ladies in the videos we watch.

    but im getting off track, I want to control this habit a little and give her more power.
     
  6. johnny1
    Offline

    johnny1 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2018
    Messages:
    14
    Likes Received:
    17
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    This is basically my situation. It started when I was working from work and would masturbate when I was home for lunch every day. It felt great for those few minutes but I didn't like that so much of my sex life was me doing it alone, so I told my wife and we decided that I would ask her permission if I wanted to do anything. Even if she wasn't physically there, at least she was involved. It started with me asking both to play with myself and to have an orgasm, which eventually ended up being a a 50/50 'yes' to the first and a constant 'no' to the latter.

    We did that until the pandemic and I started working from home, where then it wasn't a half hour of temptation, but a whole day, home alone. I don't remember how it evolved to this point, but the current situation is that I lock up in the morning and give her the key before she leaves, and she lets me out when she gets home from work. It works well for us, she likes having the key with her, and I like being locked knowing that I couldn't get out if I wanted to. Usually unlocking at night is unceremonious, we're both tired from working all day so she just unlocks me, I go to the bathroom to take it off and wash it a bit, then we go about our night.

    On nights that she comes home and wants to have an orgasm, she has me help her with that before she unlocks me, which is a dynamic that I enjoy greatly.

    Let me know if you have any questions.
     
  7. Cecilia B
    Offline

    Cecilia B Long term member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2015
    Messages:
    585
    Likes Received:
    2,018
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Hotel Assistant Manager
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    One of my uses for Chastity is to prevent husband from masturbating. It's effective. I don't keep him locked up all the time. If I find out he's masturbated or looked at pornography, I usually put him in Chastity and schedule a Disciplinary Session. He usually stays under lock and key until a little before the Session. Spanking and Chastity has cut down his pornography viewing and masturbation. If I see pornography on his computer, I assume he's masturbated.
     
  8. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    Honestly this sounds exactly like the dynamic I want and need. I need a secure enough cage.
    The temptation is too much and I am worried im causing real damage.
     
  9. johnny1
    Offline

    johnny1 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2018
    Messages:
    14
    Likes Received:
    17
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    I have a few cages but mostly use a Cherry Keeper because it's by far the most comfortable one that I own, which is pretty much a requirement when you're stuck in it all day. I've never tried to get out but I have used a vibrator on it. I don't think a device exists that would prevent that, though. The vibrator is also not that great, so usually not worth doing.

    Everyone's different of course, but on days that I'm not locked the temptation is usually too great to resist. Being locked has really helped me focus my attention on my work, so I make sure my wife takes her key with her every day. On the few days that she's left without her key because I wasn't out of bed in time, I usually end up locking up and taking her key to her at work.
     
    JT_1999_ likes this.
  10. Stephplayswithyou
    Offline

    Stephplayswithyou Active member

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2022
    Messages:
    145
    Likes Received:
    130
    Trophy Points:
    43
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Colorado
    Local Time:
    9:30 AM
    I'll say for us, this was an ongoing problem for me that became a larger problem with WFH for sure like you say. It made it so much easier to do! For us, it was me recognizing that it wasn't right and I wanted to do something about it. I felt it was something hurting our marriage and took the plunge to ask for this so it was something we did together. Yes, it's still a work in progress but I can say, for us, it's working and been a great thing so far.
     
    sis_nikki and JT_1999_ like this.
  11. johnny1
    Offline

    johnny1 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2018
    Messages:
    14
    Likes Received:
    17
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    What is your method of handling it?
     
  12. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    How much trial and error did it take to land on a cage that fits well enough for all day
     
  13. Stephplayswithyou
    Offline

    Stephplayswithyou Active member

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2022
    Messages:
    145
    Likes Received:
    130
    Trophy Points:
    43
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Colorado
    Local Time:
    9:30 AM
    As for how we handle it, we are similar. Most days, I put it on in the morning, give her the key and get it back later that night. However, things are changing a bit as we're trying to go longer and as such, I'll go a couple days locked.

    As for trial/error, still working on it and tough to say exactly how long it takes as each person is different. What works for one, doesn't necessarily work for others. Started with a HT V4 knock off. Any device that offers a few rings with the cage is a good place to start. That gave me a rough idea of where to go when decided to go with a Cherry Keeper. I still don't have it 100% dialed in, but I can wear it daily. But does require a bit of cream (I use Aquaphor) to assist. Hoping as time goes on, that will go away.
     
    johnny1 likes this.
  14. johnny1
    Offline

    johnny1 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2018
    Messages:
    14
    Likes Received:
    17
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    It wasn't too bad, I started with the normal cheap ones from Amazon, where you can size the ring but otherwise you just get the one cage size they have for that particular model. Cherry Keepers are 3d printed, so once you have the ring size down you can experiment with different cage sizes. If you have the money I'd suggest getting a couple different ones at a time, so you don't have to wait a month to get the next one you decide you want to try.
     
    Stephplayswithyou likes this.
  15. MissAmysPlayThing
    Offline

    MissAmysPlayThing General submissive owned by MissAmy

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2022
    Messages:
    88
    Likes Received:
    79
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Newcastle Upon Tyne
    Local Time:
    4:30 PM
    What do you wear for work? I don't wank at all as my self discipline of stopping is limited and I wouldn't cum without @MissAmy there and she can easily get me to edge rather than cum, however I have found that wearing sports clothing or soft material shorts with no pants on makes it much more likely I'll find my hand on my cock.

    If I wear jeans and a belt etc it's a very deliberate act and one that I'd not subconsciously do.

    Alternatively, maybe you can just keep your hands covered in hot chilli sauce :oops:
     
    JT_1999_ likes this.
  16. johnny1
    Offline

    johnny1 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2018
    Messages:
    14
    Likes Received:
    17
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    I wear sweatpants and a tshirt, so it's pretty much open season down there :D

    I am pretty good at only edging and not finishing, mostly because I haven't had a full orgasm by myself in about 5 years, and I'm super strict on myself when it comes to not ruining such a long streak.
     
    Oldocoldoc, sis_nikki and JT_1999_ like this.
  17. MissAmysPlayThing
    Offline

    MissAmysPlayThing General submissive owned by MissAmy

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2022
    Messages:
    88
    Likes Received:
    79
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Newcastle Upon Tyne
    Local Time:
    4:30 PM
    So is edging an "issue"? I don't think @MissAmy would mind me edging myself however I just have no stop switch when I'm alone and it's not a situation I ever want to find myself in.

    Why not try wearing more restricted clothing
     
    JT_1999_ likes this.
  18. johnny1
    Offline

    johnny1 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2018
    Messages:
    14
    Likes Received:
    17
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    Any unauthorized playtime would be a problem, that's why I'm locked during the day. One of the things I love about working from home is that I don't have to wear business casual, so wearing more restrictive clothing isn't something I would want to do.

    My current situation works well for me (locked during the day and wearing comfortable clothing), so I'm not really looking to change anything. I'm just posting how we do things because @JT_1999_ asked.
     
  19. Chaz69
    Online

    Chaz69 Long term member

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2021
    Messages:
    797
    Likes Received:
    658
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    IT
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Midwest, USA
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    I recommend you find a cage that's comfortable and just wear it all the time. Even if you can technically pull out, the cage should be a constant reminder that you shouldn't, and it should give you a constant low level arousal which can be really nice. And you would spoil that if you cheated. You have to find SOME self control, because if you can't, she'll be making you an appointment for a PA.

    I'm locked 24/7 in a really nice cage that was SUPER cheap on ebay, just search for "chastity A259" to find all the sellers who have it.
     
  20. MissAmysPlayThing
    Offline

    MissAmysPlayThing General submissive owned by MissAmy

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2022
    Messages:
    88
    Likes Received:
    79
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Newcastle Upon Tyne
    Local Time:
    4:30 PM
    Sorry I thought you were OP. My bad!
     
  21. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    I think this is the way I want to go. I just need to find a ring, the 2" ring that came with the cheap silicone amazon cage i bought was nowhere near able to close. I broke it.
     
  22. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    I can wear whatever I want and my chair kinda sucks so i usually wear gym shorts or sweats. I do try to put on some shorts with a belt and sneakers just so theres more steps.
     
  23. Chaz69
    Online

    Chaz69 Long term member

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2021
    Messages:
    797
    Likes Received:
    658
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    IT
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Midwest, USA
    Local Time:
    10:30 AM
    Right, I remember that from your other thread. Have you tried measuring yourself to see what size ring you really need? Most "off the shelf" cages just come with a choice of 40/45/50mm (where 50mm = 2 inch). I hope it's just that your first cage was bad and that a 50mm ring would really work.
     
  24. JT_1999_
    Offline

    JT_1999_ Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2022
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    116
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    Im not sure a 2" ring will work. Ive been looking at the sizing kits from cherry keeper and I may order one.
    Ive never seen one on a person in real life, i dont know how tight under the balls and at the base of the penis it should but but when I measure with a string, even pretty tight its closer to 4"
     
  25. Design is me
    Offline

    Design is me Long term member

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2018
    Messages:
    224
    Likes Received:
    299
    Trophy Points:
    73
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    11:30 AM
    It will probably take a few different cages to find one that is comfortable. Wear it for a few hours, then a few days and so on. It will also take a few weeks for your anatomy to change and adjust to the cage. You will have some burning where the cage rubs on your testicle. Vaseline helps with this. Just stick with it and you will get to 24/7 eventually.
    I started wearing a cage for the same reason but also for the behavior aspect that goes with it. Apparently I am a crappy husband when I masterbate frequently.
     
    Stephplayswithyou and JT_1999_ like this.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice