Chastity is usually built around the stick instead the carrot. One can see why. Simply adding more time until the next orgasm couldn’t be simpler, while orgasms themselves are kind of complicated to schedule, what with the sub drop and all. But carrots work too and are much more flexible. Our relationship is built around rewards more than punishments. For instance, I love showering together. It is an intensely erotic experience, especially when I have been locked up for a while, which I almost always have been. My KH knows this and only allows us to shower together when I have done something especially nice. (I am usually not released for these events, but occasionally I am, and that is truly a magnificent experience.) She usually wears a nightgown to bed, but when I have done something she wants to reward she just wears a pair of panties, or a Tee shirt with nothing else, or even nothing at all. Special moments all. And I always know what is being rewarded. Erections are a major target of rewards. She uses them as a kind of currency – “if you do X, you will be allowed an erection for (say) one hour.” I always do it – sometimes I haggle a little – and she ties my hands to my collar and lets me walk about free for whatever the time was. Or if she wants my hands free – all kinds of reasons for that -- she takes the cage off and has me wear a penis sleeve. These work. I am constantly thinking about ways to please her, and I mean constantly. I write love letters. I think of interesting dates for us to go on. I organize events with friends. I make it a point to remember and celebrate important moments in our history. Rewards work!