1/7/2018 The first night in chastity is always a mixed bad for me. Initially, there is that rush of excitement that comes from being denied. The feeling of steel pressing against my member, the sound of a lock clicking shut that seems to echo through the halls, and the knowledge that after I close the keysafe I will be stuck in chastity until my time is up. My mouth tends to water and I feel electricity coursing through my veins, I am alive. However, as the night rolls on and I prepare to fall asleep, the reality of the situation sets in. I might look down, hoping that my cage isn't there, or check my session several times (as if that makes a difference), but mostly I feel my psyche start to breakdown and be molded into a chastity slut. I am one of the many people who, at this point, don't feel at home unless I am caged. Since I turned twenty, eleven years ago, I can count the number of full releases I've had on one hand. For over a decade, at least one person at sometime has owned my orgasms, and while it was very difficult at first, I wouldn't have it any other way. Right now I do not have a keyholder, hence the keysafe. However, I can think of three people that I have served that used chastity as their primary source of domination. In all of my other relationships chastity played a role, but now as key as the following ones. The one that sticks out the most is the Mistress I served who specialized in puppy play. Before I met her, I never considered having my belly rubbed as a reward. Despite how new I was to this kink, I stayed with her for six years, and it was easily the best experience I've had to date. During those six years my name was Waggy, as I would always wag my tail excitedly whenever I saw my Mistress. With paws raised I would greet her at the door, she would look down, smile and scratch me behind my ear and say 'good boy,' perhaps my favorite phrase of all. There were very few releases while I was under her. By the end of my service I was being milked only once every six months. Naturally, as a dog, she liked to take me out on walks and parade me around town. As someone who doesn't enjoy humiliation very much I must say it was very embarrassing, but then again, I suppose that was one of the points. Mistress also liked to keep me locked because she found it funny how much her penis had shrunk. When I first entered her service, I was a respectable seven inches soft, and about eight inches hard. According to her, one of the sexiest things is a submissive large penis, because there is so much you can do with it. However, after my six years with her were up I had shrunk to a mere one and a half inches soft, and just a little over two inches hard. The one Master which I served took me in about five months after I retired from puppy play. The fact that I could go extended periods of time without release was disappointing to him, as Master wanted me to beg and be desperate as often as I could be. Consequently, there were more teasing sessions in this D/S relationship than any other in my life. The best way I can describe it is that when I entered his service I could go four months without starting to feel the unscratched itch that chastity brings. Under him, and from the frequent teasing sessions, that number decreased down to about six weeks. Of all the times I have been locked in chastity, the two years I was with him were the most brutal. Now that the Introduction is out of the way, I want to get back to the present. As I said, yesterday I locked myself back up in chastity. In all, I was woken up four times by erections. Typically whenever I am unlocked I do not have erotic dreams or an evening erection. However, the mind and body wants what it cannot have, so every few hours the strain against the steel cage woke me and caused me to stay awake for a few hours. At one point during the night I needed to use the bathroom, and I feel this is the part of chastity that hammers home the situation the most. What emasculates a man more than anything. I'm sure most people who are reading this know that it is easier to pee sitting down, and have the urine drip out slowly as you sit there contemplating your new position. 'Am I still a man?' 'This is so embarrassing.' If you're like me, and are a sissy as well, then chances are that sitting down is already the natural position for you. Still, the first few times I had to do this I felt emasculated, if there was anything left to emasculate that is. So now it's the following morning, hopefully I have more to write about in my next entry. Until then, stay locked, stay submissive, and try to be happy.