Chapter Four

Discussion in 'Journals and blogs' started by Hubby&Missy, Dec 4, 2021.

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  1. homebody
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    homebody In awe of GoddesofHomebody

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    It is a hard emotion for me to explain. I am always in love with Goddess, however when I am able to make her come through oral that love is front and center. All my senses are completely full with her. I am closely listening to her and feeling her movements. My sight and taste and sense of smell are fully engaged. In many cases it is very close to overwhelming. And when she goes over that edge I feel like I am accomplishing the goal of fully expressing my love for her physically. It is without doubt my favorite activity in the world and I am blessed that it is such an important and frequent part of our love life.

    I would also like to say again how happy I am to see you both at such a good loving place after all you went through to get here.
     
  2. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    Thank you for your support @homebody. You have been one of our imaginary friends that helped us reach this loving place. You and a few others helped us learn the difference between sex and intimacy. Because of our imaginary friends here when the s*** hit the fan on Thanksgiving weekend, I was able to face down my mother and realize all the things she had taught me, actually indoctrinated me with, were not right. What we learned in that year here was what made that possible.

    I personally prefer PIV with Hubby but he has gotten quite good at oral and even fingering me. The surprising thing has been how much we both enjoy just being intimate and close and orgasms only happen two or three times a week for me and mostly once a week for Hubby. But we feel more in love than we ever thought possible.
     
  3. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    Monday night Hubby didn’t even want to hold me. He was definitely tender. He didn’t work in the shop the next day but he actually felt much better. Only took one ibuprofen in the morning and hasn’t take anything since. That night he asked me if he could make me melt. He said he missed holding me close. I was careful not to press against his genitals too hard but it felt nice to be held and caressed. I didn’t actually melt, not sure why, but I slept on his shoulder.

    Yesterday he did some light work in his shop and last night he gave me my “fuzzy.” I think it meant more to him than to me. He was just so happy when he put my head on his shoulder. This morning he was feeling really good and we cuddled for a bit.

    The rate he is recovering he may actually be ready to make love next week. That would be nice. I am looking forward to having him inside me again. The doctor told us he would be okay to have sex or masturbate after a week or so. He said not to do anything that causes pain or extreme discomfort. The doctor wants to check on the healing Friday (tomorrow) so we will wait and see what he says then.

    I reminded Hubby he is still not to do any heavy lifting in the shop even if he feels good. I am off to work and I hope he uses common sense and doesn’t overdo it even though he feels great.
     
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  4. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    The doctor suggested he wait till today for our first sex just to make sure everything was healed completely and he didn’t do any damage or risk infection. This morning we woke up early and he was a little anxious. He didn’t say so but I think he was worried about being able to perform. I made sure he took his time and that he remembered it was still about making love and he needed to please me as well as have his orgasm. No problem, the foreplay lasted a long time and he made love to me just like always. Afterwards we cuddled and kissed and talked a little for a long time. It was good. He had no pain. Needless to say we didn’t make it to church.

    I got a call from Jane a bit ago. She was concerned we weren’t in church and wanted to know if Hubby was doing okay. When I told her he was better than okay I could almost see her smile through the phone. Jane cares more about me than my mother ever did. I love her so much. She and Ellen have sort of adopted me. LOL They are like the mother I never had.

    We will leave his cage off until we get to the final test in a little over two months.. If he wants to masturbate to get more orgasms, I will be okay with that.

    We decided to try to have sex every second or third night. It was going to be about seventy more days till his test so this would mean he would ejaculate at least twenty three times if we did it every three nights. Hubby is still an engineer and a geek at heart. One problem he didn’t consider in his calculations though. Later this week I start my monthly visitor. He is going to have to take meeting the goal into his own hands next weekend. (Pun Intended.)
     
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  5. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    Hubby,

    Get lots of rest.

    Drink plenty of fluids.

    You are going to need it.

    Iso.
     
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  6. enslavedbyc
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    enslavedbyc Junior Member

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    I am ecstatic to be wrong about you guys! Congratulations for getting to where you are!!!

    I never thought you two would have a chance of getting to a good place without some serious professional counseling. You definitely proved that I was wrong.

    I’m very impressed by the both of you. I wish you both continued Happiness.
     
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  7. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    We might have had something better than professional counseling. We had friends here and support from people like our friend Jane. That got us to where Missy was able to feel comfortable with intimacy and more than that she got to where she could trust me with her emotions and her heart. When push came to shove with her mother she believed in my love for her and had the confidence to stand up to her mother. She realized everything her mother had taught her about love and sex was wrong. Had the people here not helped me learn to show her intimacy on her terms instead of my selfish desires it may never have happened.
     
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  8. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    This is strange. Saturday morning we didn’t really snuggle before I got up. I told him to masturbate while I took my shower to get his orgasm requirement. When I came out of the bath room he had finished and he just went in to take his shower. He didn’t say much of anything. I asked him how it was and he just said, “I did it.” It should have been a normal Saturday but somehow he seemed different. Usually he plays around with me a little and we hold hands a lot. He just wasn’t the same. By bedtime he was some better and this morning he seemed to be normal again.

    After church this morning he told me that he didn’t like masturbating. It was alright while he did it and the orgasm was okay but afterwards he felt bad. He just didn’t like how he felt and he doesn’t want to do that again. He asked me if tonight we could do what we did New Year’s Eve. He said that may have been masturbation but he felt loved afterwards. Then he said that if I didn’t want to do that maybe we could just skip his orgasms till my period was over and make love every night for a week to make them up.

    We talked a bit more and he really did feel bad after he masturbated. He said, “You know it is not about the orgasm any more. It is about how you make me feel loved. I didn’t feel any love yesterday morning.” We are going to try to recreate what happened on new year’s tonight but without being three sheets to the wind. LOL

    Could he have been feeling what I have read here about “Drop” after an orgasm? He never has been this way when we made love and he had an orgasm. Whenever we have sex we always continue making love for a while after the orgasms. We snuggle and kiss for a few minutes. When we do it on Saturday morning after we get up, we are still engaged in loving, playful ways all morning. He is never down or distant like he was yesterday after he masturbated by himself and we just got dressed and went about our business. Maybe years ago when sex was a problem he might have been that way but I never noticed because I felt worse after sex than he ever could due to my fears and beliefs then.

    We briefly mentioned this in a post some time ago but this incident made me think about it seriously. I really believe that making love and engaging with each other during and after his orgasms must change the hormones or chemicals that he releases. Admittedly, I did not take any biology or even science courses in college so I don’t know much about how the body works but what other explanation is there for the difference in his attitude after masturbating on his own with no loving during or after.
     
  9. captivatedbyher
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    captivatedbyher romantic want to be

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    Yes! not all orgasms are created equal. Prolactin is released during love making is 400% greater than with masturbation. (I googled that years ago) I can say from my own experience that masturbation is at best a poor, temporary and cheap substitute that allowed me to ignore my wife. I'm starting to wonder if its at best a bad choice for men in relationships. I dont want it anymore. I'm just starting out with chastity, but Im finding the chase, romance, pursuit, waiting, and loving on my wife to be far more satisfying than the masturbating.

    Thanks for sharing like you are, I'm finding what you write to be more than a story, its helpful motivation to set my own desires aside and focus on my wife. The surprise is how I don't need to try to be kinder, and more romantic towards my wife, now that I've set masturbation aside these qualities sort of come naturally.
     
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  10. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    I am the same way. If I am told to "go take care of yourself" it just feels icky, impersonal, almost robotic. There is no warmth associated with it. I feel hollow afterwards. When I have been told to masterbate with her next to me it feels better but the intimacy is gone. I miss that. Now what I'm told go ahead go "take care of business" I don't do it anymore. I told her that unless she is involved, it's just not fun anymore.

    My wanting to cum is still there but the desire for it, I only want it with Her.

    Perhaps next time you tell him to masterbate, you stay with him. Make it an intimate act between the 2 of you. Play with him a bit make him feel loved.
     
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  11. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    Last night was a fiasco. We tried the mutual masturbation thing like we did on New Year’s eve. All either of us could think about was how crazy it was that night. We were talking and laughing about how silly we were. I mean what did we expect to happen when we rub each other. Last night were both a little giddy. Giggling while you try to kiss does not exactly enhance the love making mood. Neither of us was getting turned on let alone close to an orgasm.

    After a bit I actually started to get soft and Missy asked me if she needed to order me some little blue pills. She said if I can’t stay hard at 33 what is it going to be like when I turn 40? That got us laughing even more. We were having fun but there obviously were not going to be any orgasms last night.

    Finally we agreed to give up and go with plan B where we would make love extra times after she was off her period.

    She rolled up on her side and I spooned her. Eventually we calmed down and she asked me to give her a fuzzy. It took a little while but she eventually had her fuzzy and then she curled up in my arms and fell asleep. This morning we snuggled for a few minutes before we got up.

    We truly love each other but sometimes romance just isn’t in the cards.
     
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  12. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    It sounds like you had fun anyway.

    Iso.
     
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  13. maid julie
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    maid julie Long term member

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    Having fun together is also a major part of the relationship. Enjoy
     
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  14. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    Some times I swear we are turning into a couple of randy teenagers. The more comfortable we get with our relationship and our love making the more we just enjoy each other. Now that sex is not a problem it seems like the sex is not a priority at all. As Missy put it as while back, it is now about us as a couple that is in love and enjoying life.
     
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  15. maid julie
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    maid julie Long term member

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    Exactly what it should be
     
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  16. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    This is an update on how we are doing with meeting his ejaculation requirement but it ends with a little twist that was an adrenaline rush for me. He has no one to blame but himself.

    Thursday was a stressful, tiring day for me at work. My period had ended so that night I told Hubby to have sex with me anyway. He did all the foreplay and tried to make love to me in all the usual ways and finally he inserted and had his orgasm. I never really relaxed and didn’t have one. He rolled off me when he got soft and he came up and kissed me and caressed me some and then he started to go down to give me oral because I didn’t have my orgasm. I told him “no!” Just love me. He came back up and held me very close and caressed my back and shoulders and kissed my neck. He told me how much he loves me and this went on for maybe fifteen minutes or so. Finally my brain surrendered and I started to relax and just enjoy his touch. Eventually I totally melted in his arms. He just held me close and I fell asleep.

    That brings us to this morning (Saturday.) He was awake when I woke up and he slid over and snuggled for a few minutes. He caressed me and kissed me and he brushed his fingers on my breasts and abdomen. I was getting very aroused. He said, “I know the other night was not good for you. I am going to make it up to you this morning.” He slipped my nightgown off and kissed his way down. He slipped off my panties kissing my legs and then he gave me a wonderful oral orgasm. He came up and kissed me some more and caressed my shoulders. Then he took off his night gown and inserted his penis in me. He just laid quietly in me for a couple minutes while he ran his fingers in my hair and looked straight in to my eyes.

    Finally he began thrusting and I had another fantastic orgasm, even a few seconds before his. He laid there on me for a minute or so till he went soft and he rolled out and held me and made quiet love to me for a long time. Then he kissed his way back down and gave me a third orgasm, almost as big as the first two. He came up and we kissed and the juices on his lips and tongue are somehow intoxicating when he does that. We just laid there together for several minutes in each other’s arms. As we got up to start our day I told him that was wonderful. I said the orgasms were over the top but the love I felt was even better.

    This is when things took a turn. He said, “I guess that makes me the guru of love.” He said it with a smirk on his face and I told him not to get cocky. He said, “If it is all true it isn’t cocky.” I reminded him that I said back in the beginning I might have to give his butt a swat if he got cocky. He said that a girly swat on his back side might get him turned on even more. I told him just for that I would give him a dozen good swats and they wouldn’t be girly. He told me to have at it and was laughing. The only chair we have in the house that doesn’t have arms on it is the extra chair next to the desk in the office downstairs so I led him down there. I sat in the chair and told him to lie across my lap. We were both laughing a bit.

    We finally got him so I was comfortable with him across my lap and I hit his butt but not super hard. The smart ass said, “Let me know when you are going to start so I can prepare for it.’ He laughed a little. I hit him as hard as I could with my hand and I think it hurt my hand more than it hurt him. His reaction was eleven more love taps like that might get him really turned on. That to me was a challenge and I never back down from a challenge. I noticed his fifteen inch steel drawing ruler on the desk and I picked it up and swatted him as hard as I could with it. He let out one hell of a yelp. I asked him how was that for a love tap? I didn’t give him a chance to answer. I started swatting him very fast. Not as hard but not lightly either. I started counting but I was swatting faster than I was counting and at one point I stopped counting to mock him a bit but was still swatting. He must have ended up with twenty or thirty strokes. I was actually getting one heck of an adrenaline rush.

    When I stopped I asked him how those love taps were and he said painful. Then I looked at his back side for the first time and it was bright red. I was mortified and said to him, “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you so bad. I was just playing.” He told me not to worry that he would be alright. I got a mirror so I could show him and he admitted I spanked him good. He was taking it alright so I started to feel better about it and asked him if he learned his lesson. Then I said that maybe in the future he’ll behave better and not kill my romantic feeling.

    He asked me if he would get to spank me if I misbehaved. I thought for a second and said, “That would be fair. I’ll let you know if I ever misbehave.” Then I let out with that laugh he calls evil.

    While I was spanking him it was a rush. I am not sure I would do it again though because it must have really hurt. His butt was so red and you could see the marks the ruler made. I felt bad afterwards. But it was his fault. He shouldn’t have challenged me.

    By now we had wasted half the morning. We got to work on our chores and we still touched and kissed a lot while we did them. This afternoon the weather is looking better so Hubby just went to get “Big Red” out and we are going to ride around the back 20 acres and down to the stream. We’ll make some holes in the ice so the deer and smaller animals can get a drink. I hope his butt is up for it.
     
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  17. maid julie
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    maid julie Long term member

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    Sounds like you had fun. He should be reminded as he bounces while on big red lol
     
  18. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    I was a little tender but not bad. My backside was very red but not as hurt as Missy thought. Mind you it was more than I expected when I started kidding around with her.
    I did learn a lesson though. I hadn't understood how important that feeling after we got up was to her even though she told me how loved she was feeling at that moment. I finally apologized to her for stealing her moment when I finally figured it out just before we went for our ride.
    Work has been more stressful for her with all that is going on. I made her feel relaxed and special this morning and then snatched it away with my joking around. She forgave me and hugged me when I apologized. She is pretty special.
     
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  19. maid julie
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    maid julie Long term member

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    I think that you both are
     
  20. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    Thank you.
     
  21. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    Wow......

    I am rather shocked.

    Is this the same Missy or pod person from Mars???

    In all seriousness though, hits usually look worse than they really are. Unless it turns deep purple... really deep purple.

    If you got an adrenaline rush from it, I would explore it further. It sounds like you really enjoyed being in charge. You sounded rather Domant when talking about the whole thing. Well done.

    Iso.
     
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  22. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    I don’t think it is as simple as that Iso.

    I told Hubby how good he made me feel yesterday morning and he made fun of it and I told him not to get cocky but he just kept on. That is what started it. He sort of made it a dare and by the time we figured out how and where to do it and I got comfortable with him on my lap it was a game. When I hit him with the steel ruler the first time, the thing that started it all, his mocking my feelings, came back to me. I think the adrenaline rush was about getting even, revenge. Not a trait I am proud of.

    I was upset with myself when I saw how red he was because I would never want to hurt him. After he assured me he wasn’t really hurt I told him again that he put a damper on my special moment but I think it went in one ear and out the other.

    It was as we finished our chores it finally registered with him. I don’t know why then. Maybe I was still a little miffed and he sensed it in the way I touched or kissed him. In any case he came over to me and in a half saying and half asking way he said, “I ruined your morning didn’t I.?” I told him he knew I had a hard week and he made me feel so special but when I tried to tell him how good he made me feel, a little thank you if you will, he turned it into a big joke. I told him that hurt. He said he was sorry and he knew how bad my week was and that is why he made the morning about me. Then he said, “But as soon as we got up I turned it into being about me and that was a crappy thing to do. You told me how you felt and I should have respected that. I am so sorry. I was a jerk” He truly was sorry. I can’t stay mad at him for long and I forgave him. I felt better.

    Then he asked me how he could make it up to me and make the day about me again. I suggested we ride down to the creek and break up the ice so the deer and rabbits and even the coyotes can drink. I love the animals on our property. He got Big Red out and he made some sandwiches and a thermos of hot chocolate. We bundled up and had lunch down by the stream and he broke up the ice for me with his sledge hammer.

    The rest of the day we just sat around and last night he took me to my fuzzy place. Tonight I will make him have his orgasm to keep up with the requirement but then I think I want him to just hold me and make me feel loved for a long time.

    How can a guy be so sensitive and understanding one minute and not have a clue like Hubby did five minutes later?

    Maybe you are a little right though, Iso. Part of that rush may have been about the power I felt over him while I was spanking him.
     
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  23. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    To answer your question:
    "How can a guy be so sensitive and understanding one minute and not have a clue like Hubby did five minutes later?"

    Simple, we are Men. Sometimes it's like we have Fart Beans for brains when it comes to stuff like that.

    With the rush, I was referring to finding out where it came from, not from using the ruler.

    Also, that's cool you guys broke the ice up so the animals can drink. Do you leave out feeder corn for the deer or just make sure they have access to water?

    Iso.
     
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  24. Hubby&Missy
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    Hubby&Missy Love keeps us together

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    So about the time I think I have the perfect husband it turns out he is just a man. But sometimes he is perfect and I love him even when he screws up.

    It is not illegal but the game commission frowns on feeding wildlife other than the birds. The deer do a number on the native shrubs and bushes all over our property.

    The rush was mostly about my disappointment and hurt. It was about getting even and I am not proud of that. Some of it though may have been about the power I felt. It was like a moment of total control outside the bedroom. It is a little scary to have that kind of power but at the same time it is a bit of a rush. I remember Jane warning me that the power is just the spice and it had to be used carefully. I have to make sure Hubby and I are always on the same page of the cook book. I don't know if we will play games like that in the future or not. If he is foolish enough to dare me again he better remember I don't back down.
     
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  25. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    I am sorry, I was thinking "the Rush" was a positive not a negative.

    I love wild life. Especially birds. We have a pair of mockingbirds and mourning doves that nest in our yard every spring and a blue jay that lives in our tree in back. I named him Melvin.

    Iso.
     
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