Caged in a Coffee Shop

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  1. Guest 2934
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    Guest 2934 New member

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    Well, I’m back behind the keyboard! Last I’d left off, I was unable to spend more than one night in chastity. Since then, I have found a much better fit, and am now able to sleep multiple nights in a row. Which begs the question…what happens now?

    As of this moment, It’s been 48 hours since I “locked up.” Twelve hours short of my all-time record of 60 hours. Already, I’m experiencing quite a shift in my experience. One comparison I’ve heard others make online is that it feels like you’re a teenager again. For me, this is only partially true. Chastity definitely does remind me of what it’s like to be a teenager in certain ways. For instance, I woke up this morning buzzing with sexual energy that has not diminished one bit. Much like my teenage years, I barely know what to do with it! On the other hand, there’s a massive and important difference. Every time I notice the “electric” sexual energy I’m feeling…every time I start swelling against the chastity cage...my mind is pulled right back to my fiancé. In these moments, I feel a deep sense of focus purpose, which is quite difference from the chaotic hurricane of horniness I felt as a teenager.

    In chastity porn, I often come across fantasies of sissification and immaculation. However, this is not my experience at all. For me, when I’m growing inside the chastity cage (which is futile) while the key sits on my fiancé’s nightstand, I feel masculine and strong. To me, it feels chivalrous, much like a night serving his queen. It may not be easy, but it feels noble, and the idea of taking on challenges for her feels like an honor. The idea of my gorgeous, sexy, sweet, beautiful, goddess of a fiancé having ownership of my orgasms and even erections makes me feel immensely proud.

    Now for my fears: I am afraid of overwhelming my fiancé. I am scared that this kink, rather than inspiring our relationship, will challenge it. Though I’d love nothing more than my fiancé to be my key holder, and enjoy the shift in our relationship that chastity inevitably creates, I’m scared she will find it nothing more than inconvenient.

    I’ll end by sharing some thoughts I was having on my way to the coffee shop I’m writing from. Everybody who enjoys sex is, in essence, sexualizing a certain set of emotions. For the most vanilla of couples, they might be sexualizing emotions like comfort, security, and stability. For the sexually dominant, they may be sexualizing emotions like power, strength, control, or dominance, while the sexually submissive may be sexualizing emotions like fear, frustration, jealousy, and deference. The thing is…who’s to say that any of these emotions are the “right” emotions to sexualize? How arbitrary is it that certain emotions are societally accepted as “appropriately sexual” while other emotions are taboo to sexualize. What could possibly make this logical, fair, or healthy? I’m not saying I don’t sometimes feel embarrassed or slightly humiliated by certain kinks of mine. What I’m saying is that they’d be less sexy if I wasn’t feeling that way. :)
     
    triguy, Neander, Rectrix and 7 others like this.
  2. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Active member

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    Interesting insight, thanks
     
  3. bondinchas
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    bondinchas Active member

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    I very much agree that while you can be submissive sexually, between the sheets, chastity doesn't necessarily make you any less masculine, you can still be her knight in shining armour (and more literally than anyone would guess if you expressed it like that to them!)

    You're also right about not wanting to overwhelm her. That's avoided by minimising "it's all about me and my penis" and maximising "it's all about her and her happiness".
     
  4. bobolink
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    bobolink New member

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    This is very similar to what I am feeling. I like the idea of serving my wife, holding off on orgasm so that it is only for her, and pleasuring her without my need for reciprocation. It's a turn on.

    She is everything to me and I don't want to have her feel like she isn't "enough," a frequent comment when I come up with my interest in "alternative" sexual activities. I am just now, at 64, opening up to my long held desires.

    I am taking it slow and I am more open than I have ever been about my sexual desires. Refreshing to say the least.
     
  5. MistressNicx
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    Miss you my friend x
     
  6. MistressNicx
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    apologies, mistook you for someone else. Tried to delete but won’t let me.
     
  7. triguy
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    triguy New member

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    i can relate to what you are saying. My wife has expresses interest in chastity and caging. She has participated but is fearful of the sissification. I am not looking to change by gender but I do want to focus my energy on her. This has seemed to do that for me but we are still struggling as a couple to set the right ground rules for how chastity and caging fits in to our relationship.
     
  8. bondinchas
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    bondinchas Active member

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    If neither of you want sissification, there doesn't need to be any.
    There are plenty here who do chastity who maintain their decidedly masculine persona.
    You can be submissive and still be her knight in shining armour.

    It's no different to any other associated fetish / kink / lifestyle, whether that be FLR, bondage, pegging, bathing in cold custard or anything else, everything is optional.

    There are probably more ways to do chastity than there are members of this forum.
    As long as you communicate, you'll find your way to what suits you both as a couple
     
  9. bobolink
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    bobolink New member

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    I have to say that this sounds interesting... :)
     
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