Body shaming a thing now?

Discussion in 'Site announcements and information' started by whizz, Oct 23, 2016.

  1. Mascara^Snake
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    Mascara^Snake Banned

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    Well that maybe the case for you but I prefer to be able to express myself freely. I think if we try to pander to everyone's egos then we will just end up with a syrupy, gooey mess which is far removed from any sort of reality. The chap in question complained of a problem with crotch fat. I actually thought that him losing weight might be a good solution to his problem. Excuse me.
     
  2. sylvana chastity
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    sylvana chastity just Syl

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    Actually I expressed myself freely as well ;)
    Of course I am not here to teach behaviour or such, and as english is not my native language, I might also use the wrong terms and phrases, maybe Paul Simon once sang it better than I ever could tell:
    "What can I do
    What can I do
    Much of what you say is true
    I know you see through me
    But there's no tenderness
    Beneath your honesty"
     
    Mascara^Snake and greenmike79 like this.
  3. SubVerity
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    SubVerity Still the mansion's fairy godmother. ;)

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    I'm not sure we need to be tender all the time, but a basic level of kindness is to be expected. We're all of us fighting a great fight, and my general expectation is that people are in fact speaking kindly to me. Even if they telling me things I dont want to hear - I'll assume they're being kind, and that they're expecting kindness in return.

    What I think we don't want to encourage here is people claiming to be a victim of some sort or other. Once you claim victim status then it's as if you have immediately claimed the moral high-ground, and all debate is reduced to others defending their actions - rather than having an open and honest conversation.

    I've never actually seen any body shaming on here - no-one's called anyone fatty, or skinny runt, or anything else of that ilk.
    In the UK there is a saying - always with some jokey but friendly intent - "Eat less pies". It works for motor-cyclists who've discovered after a winter layoff that their leathers have mysteriously shrunk to dive instructors discovering that their BMI puts them outside of HSE requirements to professional licenses.

    That any of the messages on the other post were taken the wrong way is very sad indeed, and that someones feelings were hurt is likewise a great shame, but I know for a fact that no-one intended any rudeness to occur, or for anyone to feel shamed or victimised.

    I have tiny hips. If I were to comment about a full belt slipping down, someone might comment Eat More Pies as a twist on the saying. Should I be then be upset about body shaming, and feeling that I'm a skinny-runt? Of course not. But then I'm happy with my skinny hips. If you're not happy with your weight - then take ownership of that and do something about it. If you are happy about it - thats great - have more pies, ride a bike a bit, have more pies. And some beers. Tell you what - have one on me!

    Cheers! :)
     
  4. SubVerity
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    SubVerity Still the mansion's fairy godmother. ;)

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    Oh btw - before anyone thinks I'm victim shaming, I don't do shame, and I don't believe anyone else should.
    Certainly not the OP. Certainly not anyone who mentioned pies either.
     
  5. Nicoftime
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    Nicoftime The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts

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    Not really talking about this particular thread but am not a fan of self victimization. We are responsible for how we feel. So and so didn't MAKE me feel upset, I chose to let someone's comments bother me. By all means yes comments can upset someone, but only if you allow it to.

    I also believe people are responsible for their actions. If you say something that might upset someone the consequences might be that they no longer value your comments.

    Maybe I'm just a simple person, but I believe we own our reactions, as well as the consequences of our actions.

    Ok everyone feel free to call me cold hearted...don't worry I won't let it bother me.
     
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