Attentive Vs Intimate

Discussion in 'Chastity in vanilla life' started by Miles, Sep 7, 2019.

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  1. Miles
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    Miles Member

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    I've realised that the longer I'm in chastity the more I focuses on being attentive towards my partner,but can being in Chastity help a relationship develop on a more intimate level.
     
  2. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Active member

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    I expect the two things go hand in hand a lot of the time. Wives and partners do appreciate attentiveness.
     
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  3. Gigaman
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    Gigaman Property of BKwife

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    It certainly did for me and @BKwife, we have never been closer.
     
  4. madams-sissysub
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    I agree and i have found it takes it to a deeper level also, it creates a whole different aspect to a relationship. And the more you have it, the more you want it.
     
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  5. bondinchas
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    bondinchas Active member

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    For many of us, those two things are the whole point and benefit of chastity, for keyholder and chaste alike.
     
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  6. HappilyLockedMan
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    HappilyLockedMan Active member

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    For me, intimacy can be seen in more than one way. There's physical intimacy, emotional intimacy ... I'm sure there's more. In any case, our emotional intimacy has improved through chastity because we're talking about sex now. We never used to talk about it but now we do. Usually I'll speak first but we're talking. I may talk about how horny I am but how I like straining against the cage. She may dangle the key in front of me and say that what we do, or don't do, is up to her.

    Physically, and this continues to be hard for me, she's not that much into sex. Sometimes she'll tease me, which I love, but she doesn't want me to play with her. This has been the reality for a number of months now. I'm so ready for it to change; I love to give her orgasms.

    If not for chastity I would certainly be masturbating. I masturbated because it was easy, quick, always available and I didn't risk the pain of rejection. When I am in the cage, which is virtually always, and I approach her hoping for sexual intimacy if she's not interested it's not emotionally painful. When I was masturbating I drew away from her, emotionally as well as physically.

    So, for sure chastity has improved our intimacy.
     
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  7. elias
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    elias 6/7 on the TomAllen-Rectrix scale

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    Yes, yes and yes!

    Regardless if you are mentally or caged in chaste, it will help to develop your relationship in many ways. In my case our relationship became "almost new". It help me to talk about feelings and intimacy, for which my love was waiting many years for. Once the change of my behaviour was recognised by both of us, it led to more intimate moments ever. These moments are emotionally as well phisically more intimate than ever before.
     
  8. DonnaSue
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    DonnaSue Active member

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    Chastity can certainly help in developing a more intimate relationship, but IMHO, it al comes down to communication. Your being chaste certainly should give you plenty to talk about.!
     
  9. buildup
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    buildup Active member

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    In other ways possibly; but not with regards to PIV or oral because for me this is prohibited. Hugging is more intimate in the sense that I enjoy it a lot more. Although this can be denied to me because my Wife knows I want to hug far more in chastity.
     
  10. StubHub
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    I only hope to earn back the honor to be close to my Wife. Her complete lack of trust In My ability to cuddle without sexual satisfaction for me, is an impossible feat.

    Her suprise xmas gifts of 3 cages she purchased revived something we played with years earlier and fizzled out.

    That lead to the first 2 massage events for her in several years. Currently I am totally in doghouse over a mishap that occurred during the second massage. I left on a bussiness trip after round one of her wrath and being told she would think and decide about her reaction of what occurred.

    This week continues her silence. my calls. Video call and text messages are all being ignored.

    Friday night or Saturday I figure the silence will end and her position/reaction will know.
     
  11. homebody
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    homebody In awe of GoddesofHomebody

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    I wish you well. I think the silent treatment is not a healthy way to deal with whatever offense your wife seems to think you did. I hope your relationship rights itself soon because you seem to have a deep and abiding love for her. Good luck.
     
  12. MrsBR_Saiph
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    MrsBR_Saiph Hotwife & Keyholder
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    I am not sure what you did but I am not sure anything warrants the silent treatment. Best wishes
     
  13. MrsBR_Saiph
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    MrsBR_Saiph Hotwife & Keyholder
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    We have always been intimate physically and emotionally. Chastity is however a constant reminder of our ongoing commitment to each other and our happiness.
     
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  14. StubHub
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    I am certain the silence will break. Question is what she says. We've been together 39 years and have weathered many storms. Feeling upset and hurt her after she allowed me close.
     
  15. StubHub
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    I wrote up the event in my journal Vanilla to Owner. Will post again when she lets me know.
     
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