A step forward in our journey

We have been playing and learning for a little while now, since my wife asked for more "rough" sex. Initially she wanted to be dominated and controlled in the bedroom, although we didn't yet know anything about D/s. As we researched and learned more, we tried different stuff including rope, bedroom bondage, orgasm control/denial and forced orgasms, anal, and switching roles. As we've found things we like and don't like, she took a big liking to control and denial of my orgasms. Then she decided she really liked the idea of a chastity cage to further the control and denial. As good cages are not cheap, we've been using a frenum ring to simulate a cage. (I have a 5 bar frenum ladder and a reverse PA.) When the frenum ring is on, instead of the curved barbell, I am "caged". This has worked relatively well, as our interest so far has been tease and denial, so she is still very able to tease and deny me. In our D/s world, I am her toy.

Recently we were at an event with vendors. She saw a locking cock cage of leather and steel and took a liking to it. I then found it (or a similar one) on sale at http://www.stockroom.com/Locking-Cock-Cage-P341.aspx and ordered it. Yesterday it arrived and I immediately put it on. Once she realized the suprise, she insisted on trying it out. She proceded to play with me for about an hour while watching her TV garbage. We are absolutely hooked on caging me for her use. And she has gotten quite good at teasing me for her entertainment.

Since this cage is not custom made, and is leather and steel, it will not work for long term use. We are testing it this weekend with different underwear and pants, to see what the limit is. The two clear limitations are the uncustomized oversized steel is very visible and my steel piercings clang against the cage steel. We'll see... But, I am eager to be in her control.

Now, she doesn't know it yet, but I have placed my order for a Lori's #15 cage! I can't wait to suprise her with that. It is one of three that she likes. Since the #15 has an open head, it is her first choice for being able to tease me. We also like a customized version of the Jail Bird (with extra cross bars/rings) and a concept based on Steelwerks designs that would incoporate my piercings.

So we take a step forward in the journey...

 

We've now played with the cage a few times. While I like being in it and she has found great ways to tease me while in it, I've also found another problem. When I'm soft inside the cage, my piercings catch on the cage and pull. One of them in particular really got pissed off after being in the cage for about 24 hours. So we're only going to be able to use it for specific, shorter periods of time. Of course, this only has to last until sometime in May when my Lori's #15 arrives!

We have also gone back to our previous plan of using my frenum ring as a "chastity" ring. When it is on, we act as though I am in a cage. Obviously it does not keep me contained, but the major benefit of this is the access it gives her. Our intent for chastity is not permanent no use of my cock; our intent is her control of my cock as her toy, to be used for her pleasure only. Using the frenum ring actually makes that easier for her to tease me for her entertainment. (And she is damn good at it!)

For example, the other night (after a couple nights of me servicing her needs) she played with her toy (my cock) for a while, until I was ready to lose it. Then she asked me to get her Hitachi Wand. Just when I thought I was going to just have to watch her use her wand, and not her toy, she straddled me, rubbing herself all over her toy. Since I was in the chastity ring instead of a cage, she was able to tease me very well with being so close, yet so unsatisfied. She used the Wand to several orgasms while straddling me, so I could just barely feel the vibration and really feel her grinding and wetness. Then, when she decided she was done, she moved the wand to the head of her toy for just long enough to push me over the edge and pulled it away; very effectively causing a ruined orgasm as she sat on top of me. Huge mess, no satisfaction for me, plenty of orgasm for her; she fell asleep fast while I tried to get comfortable with a raging hard-on!

 

So this is still a hot and cold adventure. My biggest frustration is her on and off attention to our interaction. When she attempts to, she is phenomenal. Otherwise interaction is nonexistent. While for some this is appropriate, it is not what I'm looking for. About a week ago we went to a play event and I ended up getting flogged by someone helping my wife learn. At one point, while our friend was flogging me, my wife began playing with her toy with her hands and mouth. With the pain of the flogging, I could barely keep hard for her to play with me. On the way home, she said she had fun and planned to use her toy for her satisfation, since I had all the attention earlier. When we got home, she went to sleep... A couple nights later, after I had asked each night to serve/please her, she finally allowed me to give her multiple orgasms before falling asleep in my arms. Happy I was! Then, even with my offers to serve her, no more interaction for days... Really, I'm just looking for consistency. I am not upset with her for not giving me attention, as I really want it to be about her satisfaction, but I would like it to be a two-way interaction with some consistency.
On an awesome note though, Lori emailed yesterday that my #15 is enroute! They had some delays in manufacturing, but finally it is on its way.