Hi everyone. Some time ago I found this place when Googling "strapon sex" I can't remember which thread it was but of course I found the rest of the forum and was interested, puzzled by some, turned on a bit by other parts slightly freaked out by some. In short pretty normal. Anyway a little while ago I replied the following inside a thread that really wasn't about people asking questions about Chastity and it was very nicely suggested that instead of asking there I start a new thread and reask. The idea being that #1 I was hijacking a thread which I do NOT want to do and #2 I might get more feedback. Anyway, I've read a lot of the threads came up with some basic ideas of what this is about (Big picture type of thing) Its been already pointed out that people are different and some subscribe to more of less of this set of steps and others pick and choose which ones. I wonder however if some just have not accepted their fate or been told this IS the plan so get ready for the next stage. As I asked in the other thread. I would like your feedback! Chastity and denial (And Humiliation?) are tools to re-educate men into a new sort of lifestyle. Some go beyond this and add physical punishment like whips etc. *The S&M part that I didn't really "get" in the original post. The early stages are either serious denial for rather long terms as a sort of boot camp or... Its highly filled with kinks and sex to encourage the male to accept increasing controls. More advanced stages increase the denial and make almost total the service aspect of the male so that he becomes less a factor in any (typical male) decision making, sex, finances etc. *It was pointed out that some couples don't think that changing the role in finances is a part of "the deal" only the sexual control parts. At some point in this the male is broken fully and gladly (or not) accepts his fate. Some own their new position with such gusto that they hate orgasm because it may lower (for a short time) their desire to serve their dominant female. The female part of this I'm not fully understanding. Clearly its good to be King (or rather Queen) but having a neutered male for a lover can't be that good no matter how well he does oral sex? Or Maybe I don't get that part? Another stage for some (many? all eventually???) is that the male is feminized. This maybe part of the males wish? (*Or is just a way to humiliate him?) or to aspire to what he thinks is perfection? ie the Female? Or is it the woman dom that wants him put in his place or? Again, I'm not clear on the motives. Help? Cuckolding seems like a natural next step when the woman seeks a non chastised male companion in bed to give her what she is by now lacking from her chastised (and possibly feminized) male. The chastised male who is now totally devoted to his female dom is more then happy to see this, assist her and even watch and clean up (Cream Pies) Some even participate with the male bull to give the female dom a visual thrill and to add to his humiliation. Or course there are wide variations on this. I've seen blogs from couples that never use Chastity or denial but are very active in Cuckolding which seems a more advanced stage. I've also seen posts from people who use Chastity for very short term control then have wild sex together on a very regular basis. The part that puzzles me is that so many eventually follow the basic pattern and I wonder if that is the real goal of either of both of the people in a couple doing this and if everything else is just a short term stage or error? ------------------------------------------------------------- Is part of the thrill (for the male sub) wondering when the next step will happen? Just a couple of additional and probably even dumber additional comments. Are some of the male subs ashamed of their sexual needs at all? Do they for example find it repugnant to do vanilla male/female intercourse for example? Is Chastity and giving up their control a relief? And not being able to masturbate a plus? Is being denied a plus and not a punishment? I ask that because some posts seem to indicate subs being very turned on by loosing games where they may earn and orgasm (for example) or joy when the Dom changes her mind at the last minute and ruins orgasms or insists on increased days of chastity. How much of this is mostly BDSM but with a twist and how much of this is more along the lines of what I suggested. Steps or stages of converting a husband/lover/male into a sexual servant / cuckold. Anyway, please forgive me for any really dumb questions. I do NOT intend any sort of insult to anyone. Thanks for taking the time to ponder!