At the moment I am having a hard time communicating with my partner what I want. I feel like I am asking too much and then I want even more. Dealing with "regular" life like the kids school stuff, vehicles, bills and work has us feeling tired. Then add on our upcoming wedding and another family wedding later this summer, now we have very little time for anything. Chastity and play time is limited if it fits in at all. I don't feel attractive to my partner. I feel like I have to ask for attention. I need to ask to be shown that I'm wanted. I know I can't expect him to know what I want without telling him but I just really want to be loved, needed and wanted. I want to be physically shown that he finds me attractive and wants me. I don't want to always tell him what to do to show these things. I probably want and expect too much. I need to remember that we are both trying and growing and learning together. Need to cut each other some slack and remember that we love each other and that we can continue to work together to make our life together the best we can.
What youre asking for is not unreasonable, but perhaps he thinks you're too busy or tired to be interested in his interest in you? Have you tried telling him you want to be wanted? Have you dropped any hints in the way you dress or verbally? Out of curiosity, is he locked up day to day or not? I am assuming not from what you've said. If he is, hes probably trying to be well behaved an wait for you to express interest.
Ok, so what I'm hearing is you both need to take more time out of your day to acknowledge and celebrate your dynamic. Even when we have terrible times, we have a ritual where I bring my Mistress a coffee or a tea in the morning. I hand it to her and I say "I belong to you, Mistress". This happens even if all other play/chastity is suspended. Life beats us all down a lot to the point where we don't feel very sexy but if this is important to you both, you need to talk with each other about some easy ways you can keep the magic going, at least there in the background.
I certainly do not want to put any pressure on anyone, and I hardly know your routine, but I have found a little fuel goes a long way, but when it runs out it’s hard to get started. You would not believe what a few comments, a pat on the cage, a sly look, a whisper in the ear, or a filthy text can do to someone’s interest. Sometimes we need a little fuel, not much but a little just to keep us going. To show that you are interested, to show that this matters to you, that we are locked for a reason and not just because that person is humoring us. My wife doesn’t do it near as much as she used to, but she still reminds me occasionally. “I suppose you want out of your cage? Yes I do! Awe that’s a shame then”. Or patting it through my pants, “do you remember when that used to be yours?” And she’d mix in some slight humiliation occasionally like “just think, if you were bigger, I’d unlock you all the time, and now you have to earn it for other reasons” Sometimes she would just send a pic of her key around her neck, or send a text that she was about to play with herself (I would never be able to tell if she actually was). Point being, it takes literally a few seconds to throw fuel on the fire, and a little bit lasts for weeks. You don’t actually have to have a session or even do any sexual activity, just insinuate and small comments can keep a person burning. Good luck
Everyone wants to feel wanted. As a keyholder, you should expect that. I saw this post in one of your threads from a couple of years ago. What do you think has happened in the time since then?