A Life Altering Revelation

Well i have to say as i am fighting back the tears from this heart felt post, that the Gathering was very good . I can only hope that others learned some things that will help. Tiff you are some thing to open up like this & see that "the light bulb" went off for you. By you being able to let Miss Linda know just how , where , how hard ETC. We didn't come w/instructions, especially in this life style! This comminication back & forth in whatever each of us desires in this lifestyle is of THE UTMOST IMPORTANCE ! Number 1 for things to continue & grow. To find the likes & dislikes to make it a special bond between your Mistress, granted some of the dislikes will be used for amusement or punishment ! But it takes alot of work to 'figure out' things between some. Other have their own ways. Just my opinion, thanks Tiff & Miss Linda . Your friend ,disciplinedpet:love0014::anim_37:

 

tiffany, I am very happy for you and Ms Linda that you were able to have this very important, eye opening experience, and that you took the time to share it with others.

Good luck to both of you !!

 

tiff,

I am speechless. Thank you for sharing such a special and private moment. I cannot tell you how happy that I am knowing the weekend had such a profound affect on you. I know we talked several times privately during the party and discussed many deep topics. Having attended MM first gathering last year, I knew full well how the emotional highs from the party are hard to carry forward afterwards. Which is why I am so, so happy to read your post and to know that you are taking what you and Ms Linda learned and experienced and are using them going forward.

For me, meeting both you and Ms. Linda was truly a treat for me that weekend. I only wished I could have been around for the after party. Keep the faith and keep an open mind and enjoy the journey, where ever it takes you.

little pet

 

tiff,

Those that know me, know that I am not one usually at a loss for words. But this is an exception and it took me a bit to come up with what to say. I guess I can only say a few things that I hope mean something to you and Ms. Linda.

Your post clearly shows your love for Ms. Linda. It also seems to me that you are struggling to find peace in yourself with what you want and who you are. Now, please don't take it the wrong way, as I've yet to meet anyone who doesn't go through this. Just some aren't willing to admit it! So kudos to you for posting. Anyway, if I can offer one thing about this is to not be afraid to talk about how you feel with Ms. Linda, MM, pet, little pet, or any of your friends who have "been there/done that". Be true to yourself and enjoy the special relationship that you have.

As for MM and pet, all I can say is that one doesn't have to search this site very hard to find people feel about them, and why they are so loved and adored. They are truly very special people and those of us who have been blessed with having the honor of meeting them and becoming their friends are very lucky.

Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is enjoy your journey, live your life to the fullest and know that you have some great folks who are your friends (even if you drive a Dodge! ;-) j/k)

Tom

 

Dang tiffany that was wonderful ..had me bawling ...but i thank you for sharing as it cleared up alot that i wondered about from a previuos post you had made about MM and pet really helping/saving your marrige had no idea there was a problem and as usual its none of my buisness.I missed a great gathering and a chance to meet you both and it still bothers me but moving on and im sure we will get another chance ..thanks for sharing that heart felt post and im so happy that things are better for you both :happy0158:

 

That was beautiful tiff.

:love0059:

 

tiff, this post is beautiful. Its hard to believe how much you have changed over the person I was chatting so much with before the party. From all the discussions and chats we had and the ones I had with Linda, it just seemed you were so angry for some reason, you needed so much and frankly I was afraid you were going to not get out of the party what you wanted. Now as it turns out, what you thought you Wanted was completly opposite of what you Needed. I am extremly happy that I was there to witness this transformation from Pat, (the Its My way or no way), into tiff, the careing sweet one who understands now how wonderful submission can actually be.
I have said this many times before, it is VERY difficult for a Woman, even a Mistress to do the things Her partner wants, or even begs for. It takes an open communication and alot of work! It dosent come natural all the time. Linda and you have a long life and history together, you will continue to have to work on this, to practice what you both need, but as long as you are open, honest, careing, and commited to pleasing Her, you will reap the benifit.
Make Her comfortable in every request, listen to Her concerns, be understanding and work together to come to a mutual place where Both of you are comfortable and it will work everytime. If She feels threatened, or uncomfortable with something talk about it and come up with a compromise.
I and pet are extremly lucky to have met the two of you and to have had you here for a week after the party. We enjoyed you being here and cant wait to see the two of you again. I have a deep connection with Ms Linda, and I never want to loose that. Hopefully we will meet agin in the spring, I just cant wait for that 20 hour drive up there!!! LMAO

Take care tiff, and listen to the voice as pet has told you, you'll be amazed how smart that voice can be when you listen!

Mistress Michelle :sex020:

 

tiff-

I wanted to wait a couple days, read this again, and process all it said before responding. you and I have been through O/our own personal
hell over the past few years. There have been times when it would have been so easy to simply walk away and not look back. Yet, neither
of U/us did. you are so fond of the phrase, "everything happens for a reason". Well, maybe this was O/our reason. As you have said, W/we
can't go back and change the past and can only go forward from here. Let U/us take that journey, My love, hand in hand, side by side and
not look back.

you are the reason I am who I am. I love you with all My heart and soul.

Ms. Linda (your wife, your soul-mate)

 

tiff what a wonderful post this is. i am happy for both Ms Linda and you. i would like to thank you both once more because while all this was transpiring you found time to help a confused sissy. tiff for you to take that time for me was very nice of you and something i surely didn't expect. You are a SPECIAL person.

rachel

 

Good luck on your journey into permanent chastity. I am extremely jealous!

I am only wearing a CB-6000 and am now keyholded by Mistress Lucy (LittleLucyMK). However, I'd be more than happy if Mistress Lucy wants to keep my keys permanently! Mistress Lucy knows I want to be permanently chaste and permanently orgasm denied. :confused0068: I will not complain if she decides to keep my padlock keys permanently.

 

Please let us know when you use the cut off screws and become permanently chaste! You lucky person, you!

 

I am pleased to hear it -mutual consent! Consensual being one of the three golden rules of kink.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do. I am still a little envious of that silver tube and the thought of screws being fixed to it! If only that were me!

 

I am happy for you both

Tiffiny: I am new to this forum and don't really know anyone here. Thus I try to be humble and open when I become spectator to a "work in progress" as your journey apparently is.

I was moved by your entry and recognize many of the mechanisms that you describe. It made me think. I don't know you so I will not try to be wise on your behalf, but I do know the feeling of having needs that makes other peoples needs appear less important and it's a horrible way to live.

Mistress and I practice SM or whatever it is called and when we met a few years back, it was -among other things- a question of needs. We knew that we had (and have) a deep connection, but SM and its border transgressions was our point of departure and a source of exploration of each other. We reached a point where we questioned this approach -it appeared futile- and continued our search. We stumbled upon chastity after years of having it in the back of our minds. I hesitated.. Properly because of the potential ultimate lack of control over my sexual desires, but (or because of that) it now appears to be the last part of our journey. "The last part" because it is not about my desires anymore. It was -in my fantasy- my desire to be locked up but now that it is actually real, I don't really have a choice anymore. My desires are controlled by my mistress and due to the mindset the belt induces, it is now her desires that dominates in my mind. The tail does not wag the dog anymore..

Well.. I'm just saying that discovering the aspect of a relationship where her needs become prominent and tangled together with mine is something that not many people experience. SM -or relationships in general- are not about meeting each others needs but about not knowing the difference.

It makes me feel happy to hear about your experience and I truly hope that you and your mistress have found a way to move forward. Chastity or not.. The insight you gained is what I wish for us all.

 

Tiff: You are welcome. Thanks for sharing.

 

:EM_Kung_Fu_Panda004 Isn;t it amazing when you communicate to your Mistress/ wife in a way that is not threatning what can happen!:happy0187: Things just seem to work on another level that is hard to explain, but has such amazing results ( that both parties tend to want that cigarette) afterwards! lol Congrats to all that have read Tiff's break thru & have been able to make their own !:jumping0045: Keep up the work in this llife style, As even in the vanilla world things there needs to be communication! Later ,disciplined pet:anim_37::character0114:

 

life altering

tiff and everybody else..
tiff, thank you for sharing this revelation of yours..you said quite well what many folks go through in relationships and you are truly blessed that Mistress Linda has put up with you and all the other voices roaming around your head trying to detroy the love the two of you have.
She is your wife, lover and mistress and I am glad you have had this ah ha moment---this post should be put in your pretty underwear drawer and revewed on a regular basis.
riki and I go through times of doubt and questioning but we always remember the love we have. We are conrades in our journies and journey.
I am sure it is the same for MM and pet.
Love to everyone...u all deserve it
Rob:love0075:

 

tiff, thank you for your heartfelt words.

tiff, thank you for your heartfelt words. When i first met pet he told me right off that he and Mistress Michelle had at one time come to a place in their relationship where neither was sure where it was going (this was before they became Mistress and pet). pet said they had a sit down in which he opened his heart and spilled his desires to serve and Mistress Michelle did the same. . . that was just the beginning of many, many hours and days of honest talk and emotion. When pet told the story i could still feel the depth and emotion alive and active in him.

It seems to me all loving relationships are built on this foundation. It isn't about negotiating a good deal and it isn't even about asking someone to meet your needs, its about building trust and safety IMO.

Mistress Rob knows about my desires and needs, she knows about my guilt and occasional depression, she knows about my struggles to accept who i am and the self-loathing i've had to overcome to get there. She has held my darkest secrets and i have in return held hers . . . her doubts about herself, her struggles to accept who she is, and so on. (We also know lots about the light and funny parts of each other too!)

We met 10 years ago and tried to act out the trappings of a Femdom relationship, but it was only after we came to accept and trust what each offered that we really blossomed. Mistress Rob wants me to be who i really am and i want her to be her true self. i still have all my fantasies and wish lists and 'needs', but i've found they are a distraction. i've found my job is to help Mistress Rob become what she desires and Mistress Rob has the same agenda for me. We each want the other to be who they really are. (BTW, we've even reassured each other that if one of us realized this wasn't the path for us we'd support the other in that too. . .)

i don't want to paint some perfect picture here, we struggle, but we talk a lot too, and i think we've discovered an important truth: once you fully trust another there's no real need to worry about getting your needs met, there's no need to make demands, everything will be ok, you get what you need.

Youre safe and loved, everything else is gravy and there's lots and lots of gravy!

i really enjoyed my time with both you tiff and Mistress Linda, and i am so happy you both have found a new beginning. Congratulations!

 

wow, well said riki 1. Mistress and i are soulmates. W/we are very lucky...as Y/you are.

 

tiff,

When in doubt, BREATHE, pause, and then listen to the little voice. I do hope you are able to think back a few weeks and envision all that you expereinced and learned while away, and then use that as your goal to where you want to go. I hope you are able to gathering things back together.

lp

 

tiff we all have our moments. When i have one it makes me think how NICE it was before, how much i miss it and what can i do to get it back. At the Gathering and MM's house after i saw a happy tiff but what i saw too was a happy Ms Linda and shouldn't that alone make you happy. Ms Linda loves you i know that for a fact she will forgive you so don't stay gone from her too long. Wasn't it a better feeling for you being happy then being pissy, for lack of a better term, tiffy. You were so kind to everyone and seemed to be truly happy. Try with all your might to get back there and you WILL succede.
Took me a long time but what i have learned is if you have a problem talk to Mistress first. Most times you will find you really don't have a problem you just think you do. Remember all the advice you gave me and heed it my friend.

your friend
rachel