The emotional changes from Chastity.

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Kneeling_before_Her, Aug 13, 2019.

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  1. Kneeling_before_Her
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    Kneeling_before_Her New member

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    Hi everyone.

    I’ve been around here for a while and just starting experimenting with chastity. My wife is definitely intrigued and we are close to ordering a jailbird from MM. However we are experiencing a few one time financial set backs (car repair, phone broken, etc) that are threatening the cage be put off and while I accept financial responsibility I don’t want this to delayed too much :(

    To help it’s chances I wanted to ask about people experiences about the emotional changes you had—both personal and interpersonal—when you got your chastity device? Did it help your emotional relationship? Did it change the dynamics behind your relationship OTHER than the obvious ways :p How does it make you closer with your partner (if they are the key holder or not)

    When I looked up this topic I found threads tangentially talking abut this point but none with it as the focus. Could anyone please describe their experience with the emotional changes that have come up when caged?
     
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  2. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Long term member

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    I think there's 2 aspects to this. One is how it changes the relationship with the person you are with or that locks you up, and the second aspect, is how chastity changes the person who is locked.

    The first aspect really depends on the people involved, so there's no set answer. Some keyholers are reluctant, and some are eager, and some are indifferent. Some come to dislike or resent the chastity, some thrive in taking the in charge role. Some, like my wife, enjoy having sex be on their terms, but aren't huge on assuming any role. In the early days (15 years ago or more) it was a great way to spice up sex. Now it's more about me accepting her wants, and not partaking of my own. It's improved our sex life, in different ways, over different periods. early on it increased my sex drive, and now, after over a year of full time, it's lowered my drive and sexual needs, although I am in a constant low level state of frustration, but no longer want to relieve it, if that makes sense. My reduced drive and needs suits my wifes lower drive, and preference for toys/oral over regular piv sex.

    I'm a bit different in that the person who enforces and controls my chastity is a friend of ours, who was already a dominant woman, who could never find someone to serve her, who didn't think of their dick (or vagina, she's queer) first, or needed to have their genitals/own pleasure involved in, or dictating the relationship. She discovered a love for locking me up and loves the power exchange in denying me any pleasure. Again, she started from a kink background though. Most partners/women aren't looking to remove your dick and sexual needs, unless you, as a couple are into cuckolding and such, which is another branch of the chastity tree. Most guys are not best friends with an asexual queer sadist.

    The other aspect is how it effects the wearer. Long term denial, 24/7 chastity and full denial of erections/piv sex etc has made me more bottomy, and more open to other things. My wife likes that I'm not as needy sexually. My keyholder likes me more bottomy and service oriented. It was the change in me that made her decide to make my chastity/denial permanent.
     
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  3. madams-sissysub
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    I found I became even more in love with my madam, my emotions got hightend after being in chastity for a few weeks and they don’t seem to drop, I love it! Just as my madam does, I am a doting loyal slave to my madam, just how she likes!
     
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  4. Sexy Slave 69
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    Sexy Slave 69 Long term member

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    There 2 things I cant stand now.
    1/Being left unlocked.
    2/Going low after a full Orgasm
     
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  5. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Long term member

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    Same here! Once I got a cage I could wear stealthily out of the home, I find being unlocked feels really wrong, and is actually too sensitive flopping about in my pants. Funny how you can go from struggling with being locked for a week or so, and later on, you hate being unlocked!

    The post orgasm drop was a huge problem for me. I also found I was really tired and foggy headed when I would cum more than once a week. Once we got me off masturbation, and cut back my "emptying" schedule, I don't have the dreaded drop, or really crave cumming like I once did. Not being able to get aroused and stimulated helps there too!
     
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  6. MissyB
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    MissyB Long term member

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    For me the emotional changes are a reinforcement of my submissiveness and an sort of resonance between my sexual feelings and my appearance. I feel more at ease when I'm locked in seeking and wearing fem clothes as they both reflect my desire to renounce masculinity.
     
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  7. Kimberlynn
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    Kimberlynn Active member

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    After a couple of weeks my feminine sude really comes out i have always been submissive but its alot more when im locked for a bit. The feeling of womans clothes makes me feel at ease with my feelings and emotions i also love that my master helps me to get all deessed and pretty.
     
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