Steele's first blog

I will share past, present and some fantasy here.

Today though was a red letter day. I proposed to my Goddess Wife to enter into a Female Led Marriage. She accepted and is willing to see how it goes.
I have lost my way a bit these last few years and I went from a fun loving guy to an angry old bastard. That was rough on her. I explained how I needed to be put back on track because I lost track of her and her needs.
July will be a trial period where we discuss household responsibilities, financial responsibilities, sexual needs and satisfaction. This has to merge a lifestyle where we work different shifts. We have a live in moving out in august so discretion also leads this down the trial road.
She understands I would locked up until all her needs were met and it has been earned. Release doesn't guarantee orgasm. No unsupervised touching at all.
For fun and until we get she gets,her tasks set, will play a marble game. 14 white, 1 black, 1 blue.
One pick a day. White neutral pulled from the bag. Black is bad, pick another so 2 in the bag. Blue release! However there is a red punishment marble. If I'm unruly its added. If pulled, the number of the blacks in the bag are doubled and the blue cut in half, never below 1.
I'm sure there will be more, I'm so excited!

 

Since joining this site I have been able to further share parts of myself with my Goddess/Wife that I may not have fully expressed or simply not shared. This has been very enjoyable so far. And everyone is so nice and enlightening. Love the freedom of expression.

 

We are just few days from starting our 30 day trial FLM. My lovely Goddess/Wife teases me whenever I do a chore or something for Her, "oh honey just think, that might have gotten you points!"

I think She might be looking forward to this more than I anticipated!

Be careful what you wish for!

 

@Argentus I'm looking forward to the lack of sexual decisions. And yes her having final decision on household matters is a relief. But now I have the responsibilities of fulfilling those decisions. May be a daunting task that may have me not in contact with my little friend for a long time. Shivers...

 

Well it has been a few days since I posted. Mostly due, unfortunately, to being disappointed.
The device we were waiting for had not arrived on time. So on the eve of our new adventure, my Wife was acting a bit lack luster. She really never acknowledged it wasn't here yet but one could sense she felt my blues. She said before bed that night, "I'm going up, you can do what you have to tonight."
So I got a bit excited and thought hey who knows tomorrow might work out. But as I went to go about having my last masturbation orgasm, I got melancholy and ruined the orgasm...barely finished. My Wife had said she didn't care but I'd gone 10 days why bust now.
Well the 1st arrived, big day! No device.Big downer day again. No mention of the day and its significance by my Wife at all.
The 2nd day, device arrived! Ring way to small, cage pretty small. One thing to measure another to physically see the size. Bummer again! However my Wife was wanting to see it. I told her it was too small. "Well fix it!" Ok I shot back. I go to kiss her..."no kisses til it's fixed."
Hmmmm.
Well today I have to work ot so I didn't get a chance to "fix it" yet. And my wife started the day with a "Well?" And a "you know we started Mr. Why isn't My kitchen clean?"
I must say I better get in the shop, things are looking up!

 

@EvetS thank you.

 

Well things are looking up. Friday night I asked my Wife if we should just use the curve as a back up until I can make a suitable ring. She said no and we'd wait. 'I hope I'm not disappointing you?' "No." That was that.
Saturday passed easily and I found myself being really helpful around the house. The dreary weather helped too. We had music playing we were dancing to punk music like when we were teens. She started taking it to a new level when She punched me square in the nuts! Did not expect that! But after recovering, I gave Her a playful yet firm smack on the behind.
Smiling, "That will cost you 10 points Mr," She said. I look amazed at her.
"That is what you want? Ok."
Back to household chores we went. The rest of the day passed.
Tonight however, I finished my first working ring for the new steel cage. It is a work in progress. I'm glad this month is trial period, I can try to get something perfect.
I must admit I hot pretty horny trying it on and off to get the cage and post to align. All that touching, couldn't help but wonder when I would get that privilege again. I refrained.
I brought my fix to show my Wife and Her reaction was "That's rather small. Isn't that gonna hurt?"
'I hope not'.
She ordered me upstairs to put it on and bring her the key. "I don't have to be involved yet." So I did.
12:54 AM, EST, July 6, 2015. A day I may never forget.

 

Ok the day started with a nice caged erection that needed a bathroom. My Wife works from home do I passed her office and she said, "come here and kiss me."
I moved toward her with this tent leading the way. "Oh my goodness come here! Does that hurt?"
'No not really'
"Do you have that tube inserted? "
'No' I didn't because I was just a bit timid the first night.

Side story: I had a Domina switch partner one time before I met my Wife. We would take turns a week or so being the top. Once when she was the top I was summoned to her home. Her instructions were to be extra clean inside and out! Insert a medium black plug in your ass and be here in 3 hours. She lived 2 hours away.
I did as instructed but was a bit late. I was made to lay on her door mat outside like a dog naked until she let me in.
When let in I was put on her "work bench" on my back, arms secured above my head, head strapped to the bench and legs in the air.
The plug was removed without ceremony and I was immediately filled with 2 quarts of warm clear water. "This better come out clean or you're hating the clean up."
Oh my that was rough. But it wasn't unfamiliar and it was clean. She was pleased and began to loosen my asshole a bit more with a dildo of medium size. In out around in circles just loosening my hole. Ugh!
When I asked her ever so quietly to stop please...she heard me. She stopped. "Oh I see you obviously desire a different stimulation. She proceeded to get a medical bag I'd never seen before. She pulled out a few hygienically sealed packs then turned to me and said, "let's see how your penis likes to be fucked." What?!
With that she showed me a catheter and bag. "Here you go...but really you don't have control when you go! I do now."
With that she lubed the long tube on started to insert it. OMG! I could not believe it. "I buy the thickest ones I can get" I felt every inch of that thing being shoved down my super raging hard on into my bladder. She had the valve closed off and then attached it to a bag. She fixed the bag on my hairy thigh with tape and said, "this will be going nowhere."
With that she opened the valve and the bag started to fill, not much mind you, but still my liquid was entering and I had no control.
"Oh where was I" with that statement out came the strap on. I save that part.
She did tell me I'd have to come for the rest of the week to get my bag changed. I took a weeks vacation and served Miss.

Anyhow, before my Wife allowed me to scurry off to the bathroom, I was instructed to remove the device, add the tube, take a shower and put the device back on.
Wow this is a crazy sensation. Unlike a catheter that really doesn't move around much, this tube moves in and out ever so slightly with every move I make. What a constant reminder of my situation! So erotic.
I remember removal of the catheter was not fun and the after burn was intense! I'm definitely a bit fearful of removal. But the feeling of being constantly disk fucked might be worth it. I'm sure I'll let you all know.
By the way my Wife never even acknowledged whether I did it or not. Just went about the day til I had to go to work. Oh yeah I have to get back to work.

 

@Your little man I am quite pleased. Updates for sure to come. This site and all the nice people are inspiring. Tennessee...hmmm

 

I will make a few minor modifications to the ring on my current cage tonight after work. I will remove cage and then immediately put on The Curve. When the changes are complete, I will do an immediate switch back.

 

Well did what I said I'd do regarding repairs. But this is not going as hopefully planned.
I tried this in an effort to spark our sex life as well as life in general, but the initial interest by my Wife I can see slowly waning away. She just is too focused on work and other things. Basically at the end of her day She's too tired for anything, not sex or romance but anything!
I stated earlier my last real orgasm before lock up was June 21. That was a jerk off session for me. FYI last real intercourse was November 17 2014 and before that March 08 2014. Missionary ok we're done.
I love my Wife and I haven't cheated outside the home or online, but when you have a sex drive like mine, this just isn't working.
I will say this stint in chastity or at least tried, has even given me a feeling of no more need to jerk off. Masturbation now seems disappointing. Porn seems so obvious now. Shit now I don't even have that excitement.
I've been submissive to women before, but in general I'm a top. I haven't topped from the bottom here. I searched out some ideas for investigation. I recommended the books reviewed here. I picked vanilla sources of information to forward Her if she needed more info. Sent a sexy pic to Her of me in chastity..."thinking only of you lol!" Response ~ "I just don't get it"
I know that ~ just don't get it ~ topic is discussed in posts all over this site so advice is abundant. My problem is I'm running out of ideas on all levels. I'm a fetishist no way around it. This is my second marriage. My first ended up being sexless for 7 years after our child was born. She didn't like sex let alone a bit of kink. My Wife now was into it when we first were married because I was up front about my tastes. But time has waned on and I'm in the same boat again.
I have no plans on cheating, I don't believe lol. I will remain in chastity a bit longer ~ I guess for me to see how long I feel like going. But that in the long run will be less and less interesting.
This a great site so I will stick around for sure. I love the idea of chastity. Maybe I should go back to being a key holder?
In any case, I'm in it for the long haul sex or no sex ~ rich or poor ~ in sickness or health ~ for better or worse. Just be patient.

 

@ineverknew thanks, good words and I'm sure my situation is not an unfamiliar one. Just whining a little I guess but still is frustrating.
All things pass.

 

@Onescotchaday @ineverknew I agree we are in it together!

 

Well things are quiet around the house because our work schedules have just not meshed. No real opportunity to be romantic or even affectionate in the slightest.
When we do see each other, its basically to review how work was, what errands we need to perform for each other due to limited time, or we are running a family member here or there.
Its been 24 days without a proper orgasm of any kind and locked for the last 9 days (arrival of new device).
Just being patient, getting a bit sore from the small cage, morning wood no issue, enjoying the *tiny handshake* always holding my cock.
Got to admit overall not that horny or even necessarily motivated for sex because there seems to be no near end to the current horizon.
All part of it, when my Love needs it, She can have it.

 

So its been a bit. 13 days in the cage and tomorrow marks 30 days without a proper orgasm. I did have to remove the urethral insert after 5 days. The 70mm length was not a bother, felt kinda cool actually. Like a little constant dick fucking.
No just got uncomfortable at the tip or opening. Once removed felt bruised for several days. No biggie in the long run.
We been real playful. Digging old music dancing around the house. Its been nice.
I don't top or suggest any sexual or chastity interplay. She just goes about the day as if I wasn't locked really. Kinda weird but I'm growing fond of my chastity and don't really feel time is an issue.
Our anniversary is in a month and I don't care if we wait until then. As if I have a choice.
Side note: I was carrying a safety key with me for work or when out of the house. I kept the key on the car key chain. However as of two days ago I now keep the key in a box at work. I still may need that key in case of a real emergency. So really my Wife is the sole holder. Its fun being in public locked. I was a pretty aggressive dude, but now the thought of being arrested and discovered keeps me mellow. At least chastity is making me grow in the area of tolerance and patience.
Would update the gallery but my caged fella is just chillin and frankly just not that interesting right now....uh oh! I hope my Wife is not thinking that!

 

Well its been a bit but things are about the same. Life in and out of the home has been hectic. My Wife's job has been super demanding. We've had some nice quiet moments together but have little energy for more than petting.
I am very aroused at the simplest things. Can't really say it's a desire for sex but rather a desire to just have an erection again!
It's been 22 days in the cage and 39 days without an orgasm. I find that the slightest arousal leads to dripping. Sometimes it's do large it feels like a small pearl just passed through me. That's kinda cool and I really enjoy that feeling.
Last time I said I was keeping the spare key at work. Never needed it so my Wife asked me to bring it home. I gave it her and tonight I was unlocked and told to shave it up! "You're not looking so neat."
I was released and allowed to stand at the sink and shave myself. I must say it was nice to be out for the 10 minutes it took with cold water and shave cream to clean up. My wife was kind enough to apply a little cream on me. But it wasn't long enough to really say I enjoyed it. As quick as you could say "click" I was back in it.
Then I was asked to secure my second key in a way I could get it an emergency but it would be a bit difficult. I suspended the key in a medicine bottle full of water and put it in the freezer. My Wife then explained she'd be out of town for work all next week.
I was really calm about this. That means as it looks I will be locked through our July test month. I got stiff in the cage over this thought I must admit. I was shaking a bit because I then realized I have to go out of town myself for three days before she returns. So we will be apart for 8 days. My mental calculator figures my nearest chance at being unlocked will be August 9th. That will be 34 days of lock up. Longest I will have ever gone.
We really never speak much of my chastity and even discuss it much. Occasionally She will smack or nut shot me when I least expect it. This usually gets me kneeling and her chuckling. Usually she just walks away but occasionally She laughs at me and says I should get up and take some more. Then She smacks me several times fast in a row til I bend. "Awe come on you like it, stand up!" She reigns another series harder and faster. She walks away when satisfied and I won't know when that comes again.
I got to admit I am enjoying this experience so far. Amazed that I haven't cum in so long with really no end in site. Funny thing I did notice when shaving is my cock is the same size but my balls are getting longer and larger. I think their kinda impressive or at least looking at them made me grin.